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Discussion in 'General Discussion Subforum' started by Walt Oleksy, Jan 13, 2013.

  1. Allund

    Allund Peer Supporter

    @Simplicity , I also have a lot of tension in my jaw (I have bruxism), and I know it is very related to anger and rage, to not expressing yourself.
    As I mentioned, one big discovery for me was just to notice the tension in the different parts of my body. I can be tensing my muscles and not even noticing it. So the first step for me was to realize I was doing it, I just try to scan my body whenever I remember during the day and focus on each part of the body checking if it is tense or not, if it is tense I just try to relax it... from the feet to the head. It might sound ridiculous but for me this has been really important to start feeling better.
    For many years I have not paid attention to my body sensations... Some years ago I was recommeded to read a book called "Depression and the body" by Alexander Lowen (and after that I read some other books by him), and it was an incredible discovery, it changed the way I saw the mind-body relation and the importance of the body for our well being.
    I have felt also that fear when you wake up and move in the bed and everything starts to spin around, so I can understand how are you feeling these days, really sorry, but for sure you will be getting better.
    JanAtheCPA and Simplicity like this.
  2. Simplicity

    Simplicity Guest

    We have a lot in common. I'm dealing with being sensitive and not being able to express my anger/not allowing myself to feel my feelings. @Andy B recommended Soul Without Shame, which I really like so far. I'm hoping to get back to it soon, I got sidetracked by this ordeal.

    Your technique doesn't sound ridiculous at all; I think it's crucial to become aware of what you are doing/thinking and then finding ways to let-it-go. Being in the moment, observing and accepting - it's very important.

    I looked up that book and it seems promising. Thank you for the recommendation and your support, I really appreciate it.
    Last edited by a moderator: Jan 21, 2016
    Allund likes this.
  3. Simplicity

    Simplicity Guest

    I'm feeling a little better today, managed to sleep on my left side. Hopefully I will overcome it completely soon.
    Last edited by a moderator: Jan 21, 2016
    Allund likes this.
  4. Allund

    Allund Peer Supporter

    Great Simplicity! I am happy for you... you will feel better in a few days. Relapses are really hard, but also it is the most common thing... I guess everytime we have more skills and tools to get over them and don't feel defeated by them.
    Simplicity likes this.
  5. Simplicity

    Simplicity Guest

    Thank you, Allund! Yes, that's so true... this week has been horrible but it showed me how much progress I have made with regards to the fear. I wouldn't have been able to do that without discovering TMS and the different techniques that help us heal. (I ordered that book, btw. I'm planning on reading it soon ^_^).
    Last edited by a moderator: Jan 21, 2016
  6. Simplicity

    Simplicity Guest

  7. Allund

    Allund Peer Supporter

    It is great that you feel better! It is true that you don't have to live like that, with those symptoms. For me it is the same feeling, I think that I am tired of being afraid and tired of having such symptoms and anxiety, so I feel I can stop fighting them.
    This weekend I had to travel to another country for a business trip and I felt anxious and with some heart palpitatioms and dizziness, just for some minutes but enough to frighten me. I have lot of tension in my body too.
    I think this situations, as you said, teach us that we can overcome them, and next time we will be prepared as well.
    We will keep on trying :)
    Simplicity likes this.
  8. Simplicity

    Simplicity Guest

    Thank you, Allund! Yes, exactly. We have to find ways to give up the fight and I know that we will get there.

    I'm sorry to hear that you got dizzy, but at the same time you made the connection and that's great. As long as we do that I think we can make it go away completely. I know exactly what you mean, even if it hits you just briefly like that you still fall into fear.

    Fear is what spins everything out of control. I thought I had managed to control it better and I did a lot better for a while in regards to my TMS, but then my life got extremely stressful and I stopped paying attention to myself and this happened. When you're exhausted it's much easier to let the fear get to you. That's why it's so important to take care of yourself.

    It will get better for us. I'm sure of that.
    Last edited by a moderator: Feb 2, 2016
    Allund likes this.
  9. kitkatie124

    kitkatie124 New Member

    In the summer this year I was so dizzy I could just lay on the floor and when I got up I felt like I was in a globe everything was foggy and light bothered me too that went away I guess because I stopped caring about it.
    Allund likes this.
  10. Beastmode

    Beastmode Newcomer

  11. sacolucci23

    sacolucci23 Peer Supporter

    I have had a bout of BPPV which has changed me. I had always suffered from anxiety ( the first panic attack was when I was 16, and I am 33 now). My twenties included major health anxiety. Seven years ago, I awoke with an intense internal rocking sensation. My family physician chalked it up to stress since all tests were negative. At the time, I was living alone which was a massive trigger for me. I am scared to be alone. I then met my husband, and everything seemed to subside. A new chapter in my life had begun, so my brain wasn't going to stop it with symptoms.

    Into my marriage, all was well. I had my first child. Quit my job which I was thrilled about. We lived off of my husband's income, and I focused on my daughter. My daughter was not an easy child to raise and I did have a lot of stress with her. I did things to combat that stress like exercising, eating well, etc.

    Then I got the itch. I wasn't happy just staying at home. I decided to get my mortgage broker license. I started working and building up my business. It was a dream of mine to be self-employed. My dream was to be a lawyer, but this was close enough. I had the flexibility I wanted. I got pregnant with my second child sixteen months ago. I worked throughout the entire pregnancy. After I had my daughter, I had a panic attack. The first one I've had in over ten years. See, although I had anxiety and panic, the panic part of mu condition diminished. I hardly ever had panic attacks, and if I did, I could control them because I would recognize my thought patterns. Anyways, I went to the doctor thinking my legs were numb. I had gotten a thought in my head that the epidural had somehow paralyzed me.

    I kept getting these mini panic attacks and I couldn't figure out why. I wasn't thinking anything scary before they would come so it had me really stumped. Then, one night, I went to bed really late. I was working on the computer into the early morning hours. Shortly after I had fallen asleep, my baby woke up. I jumped out of bed and felt so disoriented and dizzy. She was teething at the time, so I ran downstairs to get her some Advil. I couldn't even read the instructions. I could see them, I was looking at the bottle, but it was like my brain shut down. I asked my husband to take over, and I went to bed. The next morning, I was very foggy. I was changing my baby on the change table and as my head was tilted down, to the right, I had an immense dizzy rush. I panicked and ran down the stairs to the kitchen. I thought it was because I had had anything to eat. Then, we went out to eat lunch that day, and I noticed I was very dizzy when looking at the tv which was off side to the right. We went to a movie theatre after lunch and I couldn't even stand being in there in the dark. I was extremely dizzy but also panicky. Anxiety attack after anxiety attack.

    These episodes kept happening to me. A scary one was in the car when I looked down to get my wallet out of my purse and had a dizzy rush. I ended up in the hospital 2 months later. I was told I had BPPV. I went home to perform the Epley and there it was. My right ear was affected. I had classic BPPV (although no one actually saw me or did the dx-hallpike). But I did spin for 5-10 seconds and then it stopped and I would turn over, etc. Eventually, the spinning while lying down stopped and I no longer got those intense bursts of dizziness while tilting my head. A big one for me, too was tilting my head talking on the cell phone. That stopped too. I thought, "great, this is what I had and it's gone now perfect!" - NOT. I kept getting those dizzy rushes and went to three ENTs and there was no more spinning on the dx-hallpike test so they could not diagnose me with BPPV anymore. I had a full ear work up and nothing. I even went to a neurologist who said I had no nystagmus (eye movements that correlate to dizziness) and therefore, there's no way it's BPPV. But now, I just feel dizzy all the time. If I get out of an elevator I still feel like I moving. My left ear feels full at times. And, after months of googling about ear disorders and the fact that tinnitus is always accompanying them, I have tinnitus. It's depressing because not one test can tell me what's going on now. I mean if the BPPV is gone then why am I still getting BPPV type episodes? Has my brain learned a new neural pathway? My anxiety is also in full swing because dizziness is extremely unpredictable and when a person doesn't have 100% control over their body, it causes anxiety. And, because I had a pre-existing anxiety condition this has been a terrible affliction that I've had for over 7 months now. My symptoms wax and wane. After I had my MRI, I felt good for a couple of days because my six-year thought process about having MS was now proven wrong.

    Can my brain mimic BPPV even after it's gone?
  12. Sonic

    Sonic Peer Supporter

    Hey, I understand exactly how hard these symptoms are and not getting a clear diagnosis from Drs. Have you come across this thread?

    http://www.tmswiki.org/forum/threads/psycho-physiological-dizziness-syndrome-ppds.4599/ (Psycho-Physiological Dizziness Syndrome (PPDS))

    Worth checking out as there is a document attached at the bottom which I think you may relate to.
  13. colls100

    colls100 Well known member

    Dizziness is my absolute worst symptom.

    Mine started about 8 years ago - after a (VERY) traumatic few weeks, I stood up one day and felt like I was going to faint. I didn't faint but the residual 'spaced out' or 'imbalanced' feeling has never really left except for a short while when I was first put on antidepressants. I'm still on them but they don't seem to be as effective anymore.

    Since then I developed migraines too. And most recently carpal tunnel like symptoms, which I started to think were not carpal tunnel because they would come and go so much and made no sense to me. That's how I discovered TMS and the mindbody prescription. I actually was cured of the carpal tunnel pain within days (sometimes I feel a little twinge but I tell it to go away and it does)

    However, since this discovery my dizziness has been A LOT worse. I think I realised it could also be TMS, along with the migraines. But focusing on it again has ended up making it worse? It's so so hard for me because I have some vague sense of it all the time, it never lets up. The wrist pain was relatively easy to deal with because it would come and go. But with the dizziness I have no experience of it going away and coming back. And feel like I have no control over it at all.

    I have recently started exercising daily (I've been very inactive for years because of the dizzy feeling, tiredness, headaches etc) and meditating.

    But I keep having the same thoughts 'the dizziness wont go away' / 'it's not any better yet' / 'i cant do anything about this' / 'what if its not TMS'

    Why is it so much worse now that I suspect it is TMS?

    I read so much about it and have read the article posted above. I understand it and it makes some sense to me but I simply can't seem to not care that it's there :(
  14. colls100

    colls100 Well known member

    Also, I get a bit confused about what my approach should be...

    Should I be ignoring it

    Or should I be addressing it saying things like 'go away' and 'I am in control'

    I can't seem to work out whether the two can co-exist as approaches.
  15. Sonic

    Sonic Peer Supporter

    Hi, I've not recovered 100% so feel a bit of a fraud giving out advice on what to do.

    I adopt Claire Weekes 'float' approach. Just let it come and pass through you without reacting to it with thoughts and reactions.
  16. sacolucci23

    sacolucci23 Peer Supporter

    I have felt like this is the past as well and it went away for 5 years because I changed my focus and just gave up after going from doctor to doctor. No one ever found anything wrong so I just stopped paying the symptoms any attention and they ended up going away. This time around, however, the dizziness was more intense and interfered with my daily life. I also developed a huge fear of losing control in public and driving. I think this is because I am older now and have kids who depend on me whereas before, I didn't have any dependents. See the TMS is based on the fact that subconsciously, I feel I cannot handle the pressures. Before this all started for me 7 months ago, I was feeling extremely overwhelmed and like I had to complete everything ever in a short amount of time. I remember calling my husband every day and telling him I "just couldn't do this anymore"... the stress of carrying a business, the children, etc. was too much for me.

    Then, the physical symptoms started because I ignored my emotions that I just couldn't handle it and my stress levels were out of whack.

    I also wasn't sleeping. But the more I pay attention to the dizziness the worse it gets. Like last night I wrote my comment on this thread only to have extremely noticeable dizziness this morning.

    Of course, I often question whether this is TMS or something "they" haven't caught but then I remember that one of the foundations of the TMS theory is believing it's TMS and getting an "A" in Acceptance. I've been told my countless professionals and people including Dr. Schubiner that what I have is neural pathway problem or MBS. I like to consider myself a great manifester ;)
  17. Tennis Tom

    Tennis Tom Beloved Grand Eagle

    Every professional you've been to including TMS doctors, say there's NOTHING physically wrong with you and that it's STRESS!--the definition of TMS. Yet, your sub-c doesn't want to accept it, and your still looking for missed-dx'es, not trusting the white-coats. Your character traits fit the T personality, driven, perfectionist, etc. I had chest pain years ago, thinking I had a heart attack, it became a panic-attack, thinking you may be dying from a heart attack can make one a bit panicky! I went to my doc, who was a cardiologist and he gave me a treadmill EKG in his office and I passed with flying colors. He gave me an RX for Xanax and told me to take one if I felt that way again. I've only taken half of one in maybe twenty years.

    Two kids, a career and modern 21st century life is probably enough to make one dizzy and panicky at times. When I wake up from sleep I feel disoriented too until I have my cup of coffee and Pop-Tart. My panic attack years ago I feel was also triggered by a double espresso mocha capuchino on an empty stomach before brunch--I still regret the great omelette I left behind too nervous to eat just because I thought I was dying.

    It sounds like you want to be taken off the battle ground of life for a while by having the docs find something "real" wrong with you. TMS is real but benign. I've seen many threads here on TMS/dizziness and many who've had SUCCESS STORIES recovering from it. Search for their success stories here and at the TMS HELP FORUM's archives.

    Look at the HOLMES-RAHE LIST for the stressors in your life, and talk with a TMS therapist listed here to explore why your still looking for why your symptoms are not TMS although you've been cleared numerous times that they are stress--and maybe you need a long vacation and a nanny for your kids. Maybe get Nicole Sack's TMS book "TRUTH", she's the mother of five and a TMS therapist. She writes much about TMS and motherhood, she's listed here at the PRACTITIONER'S DIRECTORY. TMS therapy by phone and skype have been found to be as effective as in person.

  18. sacolucci23

    sacolucci23 Peer Supporter

    The only diagnoses I ever got was Migraine Associated Vertigo or migraine vestibulopathy. One ENT said that I had that and then the first neurologist I consulted said I had this too. But wouldn't migraine also fall under TMS?
  19. JanAtheCPA

    JanAtheCPA Beloved Grand Eagle

    Gosh, this sounds familiar, sacolucci. Back in 2011, I went to a dizziness and balance clinic where I was tested for every possible cause of my dizziness/foggy head/off-balance, etc. Only to be told by a young woman at least thirty years younger than me, that my balance was better than hers. At this point I had a session with the head PT/owner who said, literally, the following: "When we see people like you ("we can't find anything wrong") our diagnosis is an irritated vestibular system. I would like you to try the migraine diet and see if that helps, because my theory is that you might be a migraineur".

    Don't you think that "Migraine Associated Vertigo" and "migraine vestibulopathy" just sound like different names for the same thing I was told?

    If they were being truthful, they would just call it "We Have No F***ing Idea".

    But anyway, that night I went home and researched migraine diets on the internet. I found a forum where they were all talking about their migraines and their diets and NONE OF IT MADE ANY SENSE. There was absolutely no pattern or consistency, and many people said silly things like how they could eat cheese and chocolate but they couldn't eat avocados, for crying out loud (I am not making this up - someone claimed that she only got migraines when she ate avocados). I was already well-versed in the power of the placebo effect, and I kept visualizing **Placebo Effect** in big neon letters as I read these posts. The only post that I took seriously was someone who recommended reading The Divided Mind (Dr. Sarno's fourth and final book) and that's what I did, and that's how I got at least 90% of my life back in relatively short order (feel free to read my Profile story for all the details and list of symptoms I had).

    That being said - the vague dizziness is the one symptom that keeps coming back to bug me. I totally forget about it when I'm busy and distracted, but it often comes back quite consistently in certain situations, which can only be the result of brain memory. The difference between now and then is that it's mostly quite manageable, and, more importantly, I really don't fear it (Claire Weekes helped a lot with that as well as with my chronic life-long anxiety). It's an annoyance, and if it gets too persistent over a period of time, I will sit down with pen and paper, and I'll do some writing exercises that I remember from the SEP. And practice some mindfulness and try to relax and breathe more.

    All of you - I highly recommend doing at least one of our programs, because if you're all struggling this much, you need to do the deeper emotional work - knowledge alone isn't enough. The Structured Educational Program (SEP) is on the main tmswiki.org site, and Alan Gordon's Pain Recovery Program is here on the forum.

  20. JanAtheCPA

    JanAtheCPA Beloved Grand Eagle

    Everyone - There really is no such thing as 100% recovery, because TMS is not an illness as such. It is a brain mechanism designed for our survival in an ancient and primitive world, and it will continue to try to do its job after you've learned how to control it most of the time.

    I don't think Dr. Sarno ever promised 100% recovery. But I got such a huge percent of my life back after I discovered Dr. Sarno and this forum - and did the work - that I know that I recovered from a real risk of becoming housebound. That's more than good enough for me.

    You can't ever go wrong by recommending Claire Weekes! Hope & Help For Your Nerves was integral to saving my life.
    Allund, plum and Gigalos like this.

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