Ann Miller
Well known member
The pain/fear cycle being what it is- fear of the pain actually reinforces the neural pathways that create the pain- it makes sense that while we work to calm our nervous system, we want to send messages of safety to ourselves. These messages typically sound like, “I’m okay. This is just neuro-plastic pain. There is nothing structurally wrong. This will pass.” etc
But what if we don’t actually believe this self-talk? What if we do not believe any of those messages in our heart of hearts? Do we still say it? Or does that backfire?
Here’s my take. Culled from personal experience and the experience from many clients.
Be authentic with the messages you send to yourself. And yes, focus on where you DO feel safe. There is a TON of real estate between complete fear of your symptoms and total safety around them. Perhaps you’re not yet to the point where you can authentically say, ”I'm okay. I know there is nothing structurally wrong.” But you also don’t need to go down the fear tunnel of reliving the MRI and googling the scary diagnoses. There is space between these two extremes. And THAT is where the magic lies.
So maybe you could say, “I understand the concept of neuro plastic pain and I fit the model.”
Or “My symptoms come and go randomly and structural pain doesn’t behave like that.”
Or “Last week, when I was distracted, I sat in this wooden chair for two hours. Today, it's killing me…that doesn’t make logical sense.”
Or “I feel safe in these areas of my life…my neighborhood, my home, my job.”
Or “That emotion is huge and dark. I know now that emotions are just energy in motion. I can feel it rise up in my body and whoosh over me. My character is not defined by my emotions.”
Or “Others with my diagnosis have solved their pain using these techniques. I will be patient with myself and keep going. I’ll get it eventually. I’m learning.”
You see the point here. Move one small step at a time away from the fear messaging and towards the safety messaging while being authentic with where you truly find yourself. If you slip (and you will!) and start thinking fearful thoughts, just kindly stop, redirect, and go on. Changing neural pathways takes commitment and compassion. With practice, your overall tension will ease and symptoms slip away.
My best to you.
www.pathsbeyondpain.com
But what if we don’t actually believe this self-talk? What if we do not believe any of those messages in our heart of hearts? Do we still say it? Or does that backfire?
Here’s my take. Culled from personal experience and the experience from many clients.
Be authentic with the messages you send to yourself. And yes, focus on where you DO feel safe. There is a TON of real estate between complete fear of your symptoms and total safety around them. Perhaps you’re not yet to the point where you can authentically say, ”I'm okay. I know there is nothing structurally wrong.” But you also don’t need to go down the fear tunnel of reliving the MRI and googling the scary diagnoses. There is space between these two extremes. And THAT is where the magic lies.
So maybe you could say, “I understand the concept of neuro plastic pain and I fit the model.”
Or “My symptoms come and go randomly and structural pain doesn’t behave like that.”
Or “Last week, when I was distracted, I sat in this wooden chair for two hours. Today, it's killing me…that doesn’t make logical sense.”
Or “I feel safe in these areas of my life…my neighborhood, my home, my job.”
Or “That emotion is huge and dark. I know now that emotions are just energy in motion. I can feel it rise up in my body and whoosh over me. My character is not defined by my emotions.”
Or “Others with my diagnosis have solved their pain using these techniques. I will be patient with myself and keep going. I’ll get it eventually. I’m learning.”
You see the point here. Move one small step at a time away from the fear messaging and towards the safety messaging while being authentic with where you truly find yourself. If you slip (and you will!) and start thinking fearful thoughts, just kindly stop, redirect, and go on. Changing neural pathways takes commitment and compassion. With practice, your overall tension will ease and symptoms slip away.
My best to you.
www.pathsbeyondpain.com
