Really struggling, urinary urgency

[Leslie735]

Thank you for posting Gypsysoul! It's nice to hear from another person who understands. I'm SO glad to hear you are feeling better. Feel free to PM me and we can chat and maybe help each other.

 

[Leslie735]

TMS? Today, I had a great day with my family, my husband and I took our 2 kids to the beach, all day. We had a lot of fun, my parents and my older brother came along. I felt fine all day, even thinking about my symptoms they were still not there. As soon as we got home, bam, urinary urgency is here after using the restroom upon returning home. Why would that happen? Why would I be fine all day then as soon as I get home it shows up?

 

[Eric "Herbie" Watson]

TMS? Today, I had a great day with my family, my husband and I took our 2 kids to the beach, all day. We had a lot of fun, my parents and my older brother came along. I felt fine all day, even thinking about my symptoms they were still not there. As soon as we got home, bam, urinary urgency is here after using the restroom upon returning home. Why would that happen? Why would I be fine all day then as soon as I get home it shows up?

It is trying to confuse you " The mechanism". Don't give into it, you have it on the ropes at 80 to 90 % better. Just stay course and don't fear ok. Think psychological at all times and you will get better again soon. Don't try to get better just do all of the steps in the SEP and don't fear or focus on the body ( if you must focus somewhere on the body that you don't hurt). You got this, keep your courage -- You are winning.

 

[Eric "Herbie" Watson]

I have struggled severely with urinary urgency. In fact, last Wednesday I called the urologist in tears because it hurt so bad and there was no infection. In My mind, I actually figured it was TMS but I had thought I beat the urinary symptoms years ago. So urologist called in a muscle relaxer and Xanax. Told me to take one or the other. I took the Xanax, and boom, pain was gone, which tells me it was anxiety (TMS) causing the pain, not a urinary/bladder problem. Once I had this "aha" moment, the urgency went away. A day later, I'm painting and have an excruciating back spasm which I've struggled with for a few days. Had a tough go of it for a few days then found this site and listened to some of Herbie and Bruce's recordings and I am remarkably better. I sometimes wonder if people with our personalities try to master TMS too hard and that's what keeps us sick. I had an amazing childhood and a great life so far, but the reality is I am a perfectionist and a worrier. I truly think that's why I have TMS. There are no dark secrets lurking in my past. I just need to let go, trust TMS and move on feel free to contact me if you ever need to about the bladder problems. I really struggled. Have a great day!

Kristen

Awesome, love it.....

 

[Eric "Herbie" Watson]

Hi Eric,

Thanks for the well wishes! I really appreciate it. I'm still battling the same prostatitis like symptoms that I first wrote about on here in February. It's tough because my back pain from years ago was cured quickly and completely by learning about and believing in TMS.

This is the part you have to hold onto to know that if your back healed then your other ailments will heal too as you continue to re-condition. Some have been reconditioning for years but its always a healing journey. I remember one night on the radio show and we we're talking and someone brought up neck pain.
I remembered that I had neck pain for like 20 yeas. All the other pains we're so much more thought consuming so I didn't even know that while I was healing from other symtoms I healed from neck pain at the same time -- unknowingly till Bruce or Forest mentioned this type of pain on the show. I was like checking my neck and boom -- no pain. So to make a long story short. You are still re-conditioning that's all. Dont trivialize this thought with worry because it becomes a fear thought then and your not thinking clean as they say. When you somehow forget the symptom you lose the pain through reconditioning.

This just doesn't seem to want to quit, and as I wrote earlier, I'm still taking the antibiotics so that makes it difficult to 100% say it's TMS while I'm taking medication for prostatitis. Think it's time to dive into the structured education program and see if that can help me.

Thanks for always being here for so many of us!!!

If your taking antibiotics as long as your still thinking psychological and about your emotions being the culprits to pain you should be fine ok. Remember know why you are thinking trivialities and you will always have the right psychological answer to focus on your emotions and explain them.

 

[Leslie735]

Thanks Eric!

 

[Walt Oleksy (RIP 2021)]

Kristen, you are probably right that since you can't recall any bad childhood experiences, your TMS
is probably from being a perfectionist and a worrier. Those two will bring on the pain.
It's not easy to break long standing habits like those, but if we work on it, we can do it.

Expect less of ourselves (we will still be doing a lot more than most people),
and stop worrying. Don't even worry about today, much less tomorrow.

Distract your worrying with keeping active and doing things and thinking about things you like.

 

[Leslie735]

I think that is where mine stems from. I'm always in a constant worry. I worry about everything, finances, my weight, health, school, my kids, my family, what people think about me, etc. etc. etc.

 

[gypsysoul]

I think that is where mine stems from. I'm always in a constant worry. I worry about everything, finances, my weight, health, school, my kids, my family, what people think about me, etc. etc. etc.

Leslie, let's definitely schedule a time to chat on the phone! I will be back in Dallas tomorrow so I will have free time to chat. It's interesting you say you worry about your weight. I do too and think I probably worry way too much about it. My weight and my appearance are a constant worry. I see people so much larger than me and so much more confident and I'm jealous having two babies just doesn't do too much for the figure I hope you are feeling a little better!

 

[Tru B Leever]

If your taking antibiotics as long as your still thinking psychological and about your emotions being the culprits to pain you should be fine ok. Remember know why you are thinking trivialities and you will always have the right psychological answer to focus on your emotions and explain them.

That's kind of what I'm trying to do. I'm taking the antibiotics because they say you should always finish the full course of antibiotics, but in my head, I'm thinking TMS. What I tell myself is, "Yes, I probably did have a real prostate infection back when this began a few months ago, but the antibiotics killed that infection. Then, my brain latched on to those urinary urgency symptoms I had when it realized how much of a massive distraction it was." My symptoms have consumed me, made me stop going to the gym, made me only wear my loosest jeans, made me afraid of long car rides, etc. Talk about a distraction!!!

 

[gypsysoul]

Leslie, let's definitely schedule a time to chat on the phone! I will be back in Dallas tomorrow so I will have free time to chat. It's interesting you say you worry about your weight. I do too and think I probably worry way too much about it. My weight and my appearance are a constant worry. I see people so much larger than me and so much more confident and I'm jealous having two babies just doesn't do too much for the figure I hope you are feeling a little better!

Are you in the US?

 

[Tru B Leever]

I sometimes wonder if people with our personalities try to master TMS too hard and that's what keeps us sick.

Hi Kristen,
That's a really interesting thought. I know when my symptoms are really bad, I spend hours and hours reading and re-reading TMS forum posts and articles and watching youtube videos. It's like I'm searching for any little thing that will reinforce my beliefs that my symptoms are caused by TMS. Maybe I'm dwelling on it too much?
Jeff

 

[Walt Oleksy (RIP 2021)]

Yes, Jeff, you seem to be spending too much time on TMS work. Try to balance it with happy thoughts
and activities. You need to work on believing 100 percent that your symptoms are caused by TMS
repressed emotions and/or your maybe perfectionist and "goodism" personality.

Have fun. Enjoy life. You deserve it.

 

[gypsysoul]

Hi Kristen,
That's a really interesting thought. I know when my symptoms are really bad, I spend hours and hours reading and re-reading TMS forum posts and articles and watching youtube videos. It's like I'm searching for any little thing that will reinforce my beliefs that my symptoms are caused by TMS. Maybe I'm dwelling on it too much?
Jeff

Jeff, there is no question that dwelling on it makes it worse.

 

[Eric "Herbie" Watson]

Jeff, there is no question that dwelling on it makes it worse.

Yes it does. You guys hit it right on the head. I would say worry is the absolute worse when it comes to pain and anxiety. That is what you have to work on over coming -- all of the worry and stress.
Some worry is unconscious that is why we have to recondition to it.
When you stop fear you don't worry. When you stop stressing you don't worry. When you stop the negative self talk you don't worry. A lot of worry has to be caught through your belief system. Like you might have always worried about your bills and its just a part of your thought stream, well you can catch that thought. Stop worrying about it and over time you will be free of that specific worry.
The more important part is the more you become used to being in the now and just letting life flow without thoughts of doubt and fear controlling your thinking -- you almost instantly feel better right then and there. Then you just have to repeat until you get the desired effect.
Bless You

 

[Leslie735]

I try to let my "worry" go but it's really really really difficult! I'll have moments where I'm 100% positive this is just TMS, then my mind will fight it and throw in the negative that it could be IC or something else. I hate it and I'm so tired of it.

 

[Eric "Herbie" Watson]

I try to let my "worry" go but it's really really really difficult! I'll have moments where I'm 100% positive this is just TMS, then my mind will fight it and throw in the negative that it could be IC or something else. I hate it and I'm so tired of it.

If you see yourself with IC. You could Focus on the emotion. Like Eugene Gendlins focusing. Do you know how to do that. It will make it possible for this emotion that you feel to leave. We always have emotions with thoughts.
You will feel the emotion and not judge it or fear it or criticize it. Then you will think, this is what this emotion of fear feels like. Then you will think about the way it feels again -- like how does the emotion feel in your body. As you do this back and forth it should make the emotion go away cause the fight, flight response isn't meant to last that long if you think of it and don't fear it.
Then if you see it in your minds eye you could change the picture to one in which you are all healthy, vibrate, strong and full of courage. If you look at the summary for the next tuesday night discussion you should see a swish. Or a reframe that will tell you the how to.... Let me know if you have any questions.
Bless You

 

[Leslie735]

I'm not sure I follow what your saying?

 

[miffybunny]

Hi Leslie,

I just wanted to let you know I went through a horrendous period of IC many years ago. I was just married and we moved to Arizona. I had bladder installations etc etc., I lost a ton of weight, went to all sort of urologists and urogynecologists. I had it for about 6 months and then it disappeared. Just like that. Looking back, I realize it was TMS. Marriage, moving and looking for work were all factors in generating inner tension that I was unaware of at the time. I just wanted to give you hope and reassure you. I know the kind of torture "IC" is but it's just TMS. Every time you feel the urgency try to shift your focus to what you are feeling. It will go away!!
MiffyBunny

 

[Leslie735]

miffybunny, thank you for your reply! That is so reassuring!! Would you mind if I private messaged you with a few questions?