I have had a bout of BPPV which has changed me. I had always suffered from anxiety ( the first panic attack was when I was 16, and I am 33 now). My twenties included major health anxiety. Seven years ago, I awoke with an intense internal rocking sensation. My family physician chalked it up to stress since all tests were negative. At the time, I was living alone which was a massive trigger for me. I am scared to be alone. I then met my husband, and everything seemed to subside. A new chapter in my life had begun, so my brain wasn't going to stop it with symptoms.
Into my marriage, all was well. I had my first child. Quit my job which I was thrilled about. We lived off of my husband's income, and I focused on my daughter. My daughter was not an easy child to raise and I did have a lot of stress with her. I did things to combat that stress like exercising, eating well, etc.
Then I got the itch. I wasn't happy just staying at home. I decided to get my mortgage broker license. I started working and building up my business. It was a dream of mine to be self-employed. My dream was to be a lawyer, but this was close enough. I had the flexibility I wanted. I got pregnant with my second child sixteen months ago. I worked throughout the entire pregnancy. After I had my daughter, I had a panic attack. The first one I've had in over ten years. See, although I had anxiety and panic, the panic part of mu condition diminished. I hardly ever had panic attacks, and if I did, I could control them because I would recognize my thought patterns. Anyways, I went to the doctor thinking my legs were numb. I had gotten a thought in my head that the epidural had somehow paralyzed me.
I kept getting these mini panic attacks and I couldn't figure out why. I wasn't thinking anything scary before they would come so it had me really stumped. Then, one night, I went to bed really late. I was working on the computer into the early morning hours. Shortly after I had fallen asleep, my baby woke up. I jumped out of bed and felt so disoriented and dizzy. She was teething at the time, so I ran downstairs to get her some Advil. I couldn't even read the instructions. I could see them, I was looking at the bottle, but it was like my brain shut down. I asked my husband to take over, and I went to bed. The next morning, I was very foggy. I was changing my baby on the change table and as my head was tilted down, to the right, I had an immense dizzy rush. I panicked and ran down the stairs to the kitchen. I thought it was because I had had anything to eat. Then, we went out to eat lunch that day, and I noticed I was very dizzy when looking at the tv which was off side to the right. We went to a movie theatre after lunch and I couldn't even stand being in there in the dark. I was extremely dizzy but also panicky. Anxiety attack after anxiety attack.
These episodes kept happening to me. A scary one was in the car when I looked down to get my wallet out of my purse and had a dizzy rush. I ended up in the hospital 2 months later. I was told I had BPPV. I went home to perform the Epley and there it was. My right ear was affected. I had classic BPPV (although no one actually saw me or did the dx-hallpike). But I did spin for 5-10 seconds and then it stopped and I would turn over, etc. Eventually, the spinning while lying down stopped and I no longer got those intense bursts of dizziness while tilting my head. A big one for me, too was tilting my head talking on the cell phone. That stopped too. I thought, "great, this is what I had and it's gone now perfect!" - NOT. I kept getting those dizzy rushes and went to three ENTs and there was no more spinning on the dx-hallpike test so they could not diagnose me with BPPV anymore. I had a full ear work up and nothing. I even went to a neurologist who said I had no nystagmus (eye movements that correlate to dizziness) and therefore, there's no way it's BPPV. But now, I just feel dizzy all the time. If I get out of an elevator I still feel like I moving. My left ear feels full at times. And, after months of googling about ear disorders and the fact that tinnitus is always accompanying them, I have tinnitus. It's depressing because not one test can tell me what's going on now. I mean if the BPPV is gone then why am I still getting BPPV type episodes? Has my brain learned a new neural pathway? My anxiety is also in full swing because dizziness is extremely unpredictable and when a person doesn't have 100% control over their body, it causes anxiety. And, because I had a pre-existing anxiety condition this has been a terrible affliction that I've had for over 7 months now. My symptoms wax and wane. After I had my MRI, I felt good for a couple of days because my six-year thought process about having MS was now proven wrong.
Can my brain mimic BPPV even after it's gone?
