Beginning my TMS journey.

Hi everyone.
I had the opportunity to see a TMS doctor on Monday. It was Dr. John Sklar and I really liked him.
He diagnosed me with TMS and numerous TMS EQUIVALENTS. After reading The Great Pain Deception and all of Sarno's books and a few others, I was convinced that TMS was behind all of my issues but wanted professional confirmation.

Now that I have put the last pieces of the puzzle together, I realize that I likely had TMS as a young child. It does explain why strange symptoms would pop up throughout my life, but would always self resolve and for the most part, I had a great, normal, healthy life up until 2007.

From 2002-2006 I experienced some pretty crazy emotional stressors, one after the other for that entire 5 year period including death of father, death of father in law, death of best friend, cancer scare, loss of beloved dog, work stress, major job change (husband), relationship issues, hurricane, and some other personal issues that were very stressful.

I had the financial opportunity to retire early (age 43) in 2007 and I jumped at the chance because I was getting more and more weird physical symptoms that were making my job as a Registered Nurse in a busy ICU's harder and harder to do.

I had begun getting chronic pain, joint pain and fibro like symptoms that were mild in 2002 and slowly escalated to becoming moderate in 2007. I remember a few weeks before I retired, and I was walking to my car after a 12 hours shift and the pain was so bad, I felt like my muscles were on "FIRE".
By 2007, I had developed neck pain (especially when looking down), low back and hip pain, heel pain, knee pain and generalized fibro/flu like symptoms.

Looking back now, I found it interesting that my first experience with back pain came a few months after my father was diagnosed with terminal cancer. He began having lower back pain and went to the doctor. He was diagnosed with inoperable stage 4 lung cancer. His back pain was coming from a large tumor growing around his lumbar spine that had spread from his lung area.

So, a few months later, I bent down to lift something, FELT PAIN IN MY LOWER BACK and BOOM. The stage was set. That trigger would later cause me to hurt my back at work and have to take a leave of absence. Then next came a hip injury and so on and so on................

I now believe that my TMS EXPLODED in 2007, because of those stressful issues I mentioned.

I retired in April of 2007 and was set to ENJOY MY NEW FREEDOM............But instead, just a few weeks later, I ended up going from doctor to doctor to doctor doing one test after another as my TMS morphed into over 30 TMS EQUIVALENTS. I wanted to list them here. I know now that TMS goes way beyond just chronic pain for some people.

I had tolerated ALL FOODS, my entire life, but in 2007, I began getting severe abdominal bloating and was diagnosed with NUMEROUS FOOD ALLERGIES. After this, my hormones went CRAZY, my joint pain and fibro skyrocketed, I got depressed for the first time in my life and my insomnia was beyond horrible.

Other TMS EQUIVALENTS I HAD WERE:

pollen allergies, GERD, anxiety, palpations, tachycardia, asthma, shortness of breath, Bursitis, Chronic Fatigue, cold sores, IBS, depression, dry eyes, dyspepsia, skin rashes/eczema, Epstien-barr virus, fasciculation, floaters, frozen shoulder, gastritis, bloating/gas, gingivitis, teeth sensitivity, hair loss, heel pain/plantar fascists, hiatal hernia, hot flashes, I.C., nose bleeds, numbness/paraesthesia, OCD, thirst, warts, fungal toe infections and intestinal candida along with thrush..........and immune suppression.

I don't have many of these anymore thank goodness.
Taking some of the most offending foods out of my diet helped with so many of those TMS equivalents and keeps my chronic pain/fibro from being worse than it is. But I still have a very restricted diet and it is my future visualization that one day, when I heal from TMS, that I will be able to eat normally again.

I have been doing a NEUROPLASTICITY program which is brain retraining for the last 2 years and have seen improvements with it. It is called DNRS (Dynamic Neural Retraining System)
Many people who do this program recover in 6 months to 1 year but it is taking me longer. So finding TMS and adding that into my healing has really helped. I already knew that I had a mind body issue but did not have the whole picture.

So I am very grateful for TMS Wiki (Thank you Forest.), and for all of the TMS books, doctors, therapists and programs for us to heal.

I am due to start the PP (Presence Process) and have plans to work with one of Alan Gordon's therapists.

What has really helped is getting out and living life again, exercising and making it my job NOT TO BE DISTRACTED BY THE SYMPTOMS.

I loved Dr. Sklar's advice for me to embrace my symptoms, (don't resist them), he talked to me about Acceptance, Gratitude and Connection. That was a welcome change from how most doctors treat you.

Just wanted to say hello to everyone. I am getting a lot of great insight reading some of your posts.

 

Hi, Grateful. You are doing everything right and will soon be free of all your pain that is left.

You had a lot of stressful things happen to you a few years, any one of which could cause TMS, but together it was what Steve Ozanich
calls a "perfect storm" for TMS.

It's great that you saw Dr. Sklar and now will be seeing one of Dr. Gordon's therapists.
Starting the Presence Process is up to you. I am not an expert in it. I think the Structured Educational Program would be more helpful before the PP.
The SEP is free in the subforum on this web site and helped me and hundreds of others to heal with TMS healing practices.

It's very important to live in the present, not the past or future. And be positive and practice deep breathing throughout every day. It's profoundly relaxing. Breath through the nose to the count of 7, fill the lungs and hold to the count of 4, then release the breath through the mouth to the count of 8.
Even 4-4-4 works. Good luck and keep posting.

 

zenhabits.net/unwanted

 

Walt,
I am glad u reminded me about the SEP. Something kept telling me to do that first. So I think I will. I will finish reading my Presence Process book, then begin the SEP. And my first appointment with a TMS therapist is in a few weeks so that sounds like a good plan. I am making sure to get out and LIVE and have tried to keep my recovery simple by not trying too hard and not doing more than one program at a time.

I do believe that I will benefit from the PP, and the SEP.
I have the Andrew Weil Deep Breathing CD mentioned in Steve-O's book, so that will be a good place to start.
Yes, I totally agree about what you said, my situation turned into the perfect storm. And now I am finding my way back into the light of LIFE...........

 

Good luck to you. It is a process. Glad to share it with others who have been enduring this. Welcome.