Recent content by phizzy56

Thanks for the reply, Walt. I do need to forgive my dad, and lately I feel compelled to broach the subject with him personally (well, through email at least) rather than leaving it all in the journal. Perhaps my forgiving him will not only help me heal but also help him heal as well. I am...

What I've been learning the past several days is that I'm not afraid of revisiting the traumatic events of my past, and actually I can remember all of them with precise detail. I don't think there are any memories that have been repressed. I was never sexually abused or anything like that. From...

I've been suffering from back pain and spasms for a year since an MRI revealed a bulging disc and degeneration. During that year I've had virtually no real anxiety as I've been transfixed on my back, and so I've had a bottle of Valium sitting untouched behind anti-inflammatories and muscle...

Yesterday was the first real journal exercise of the program. I chose one of my past traumatic experiences and just started writing, unsure of what was going to happen. About two minutes later, holy cow I just started bawling like a baby! I can't remember the last time I cried. It came out of...

Thanks for your insight, Walt. I too had a difficult childhood which I'm sure is a major root cause of my problems. It will be interesting to delve into these things in the coming weeks through journaling. As I've been lurking around this forum the past couple of days I've seen the amount of...

Not that direct scene I mentioned earlier but here is another...Big Pussy is laid out in spasm as he talks to his boss, Tony Soprano, about some of the stresses in his life. He is of course unable to talk about the biggest stressor in his life, which is the fact that he has become an informant...

Definitely, living in a different country is a challenge for anybody, so those of us who are susceptible to TMS really face a mountain to climb.

Any fans of The Sopranos? The character "Big Pussy" suffered from constant back pain and spasms during his time on the show. Eventually he had surgery, only to proclaim angrily a few weeks later that his back "don't feel one iota different". Eventually we learn that he was arrested for drugs and...

I just want to put some words down that might be read by people who understand what I'm going through. Even as kid I experienced what I now realize is TMS, although it was infrequent and usually fairly mild. My first serious TMS occurrence happened at age 20. I had lost a football scholarship...