Tms, Paxil withdrawal, nerve pain

I’m a long time believer in TMS. Last year my boss screwed me with bonus and my ear pain was unbearable - although I blamed it on a concussion - it went away.

About 4 months ago I tried to go off Paxil and became manic. Went back on shortly after. Worst trauma of my life. Having problems regulating my body temperature with lots of sweating still. At one point during this I was put on Levaquin for an infection. Of course I researched the nerve and leg pain side effects and immediately felt them. During this I also experienced the most painful orgasm with an electric shock up and down my whole left side.

Now I have burning leg and feet. Like fire. Like electricity. Also burning urination. Also my glutes are stuck in a spasm.

But sometimes I feel no pain at all!! As a result I know it is TMS but I fear it will never go away!!

I’m also 37 and hate my job and decision to take it. Have a mortgage so I have to work the job. Actually like a woman who is not available right now. And I am scared. Not to mention a ton of childhood trauma and I might be bipolar.

Anyone ever go through this kind of pain? How did you recover? Thanks!!

 

Hi Frank,

There are a lot of stories in our Success Subforum from members who have recovered from incredibly lengthy lists of what seem like intractable and overwhelming symptoms. I suggest that you start there. Read at least a couple every day (unless they are super-long - one of those a day is enough - but they are always worth the time!)

Oh, and check out my post about The Mind And Fitness Podcast. Lots of good advice for people who are stuck.

Good luck,

~Jan

 

Most of us had those...especially the burning legs, feel, broken glass under the skin, butt in spasm....

Read the work of our Patriarch Dr. John Sarno. His work will explain the symptoms AND the mortgage, frustrated love life and the job you hate... all in one swing!

My Personal fave is "Healing back Pain" by John Sarno m.d. He wrote "The mindbody prescription" "The divided Mind" and one other book (Mind over back pain?)

and the burning and spasms are all gone and have been for a long time.

 

Thanks - i did - and I know the problem. My issue is that I hate my job. But I can’t leave my job. How does one heal when they can’t change the situation causing the pain?

 

Sarno explains all of that in "Healing Back Pain". I Used to work in an industry I LOATHED but it was the best money I could make to support my family. My pain left in around a month and I didn't leave that business for 6 or 7 more years.
The question you just asked is one of the most common questions he used to get and it is listed first or second in one of the sections. There are and have been many things that are 'less than ideal ' in my life since but I have been painfree since '99.

Grab a copy of the book and it will all be made clear.

 

Frank, your pain is there because you have allowed yourself to be a victim of your situation, and your brain doesn't want you to be aware of that. Get back to journaling, and be honest about the choices you are making. You have to acknowledge and accept the truth about reality, and stop hating yourself. When you do that, your brain will give up trying to cover up.

 

But won’t I just then be sad and depressed? leaving the job is not an option.

 

Have you even read Dr Sarno?

 

Yes twice!

 

It seems that you missed his whole point. I recommend his last book, The Divided Mind.

How about the SEP? Our Structured Educational Program?

 

Look, I've been trying to do this on my phone and now I have to go, but I'll get back to you.

 

In the meantime, check out @Nicole J. Sachs LCSW. She really addresses this issue.

 

Thanks!!

 

I'm copying and pasting something I just wrote for someone else, because these three things are the key to doing this work.

This work is all about taking control over your unconscious negative thoughts, the ones that your primitive brain is trying to overwhelm you with - so that it can keep you safe and in fear at all times. You MUST TAKE CONTROL and call bullshit on that crap!

You also MUST be willing to look hard and completely honestly at the negative emotions your primitive brain is trying to cover up with the symptoms.

Most importantly (and this is mentioned frequently in my favorite podcasts, in the SEP and the Recovery Program, and in every Success Story) you have to stop obsessing about your symptoms. That's part of the negative chatter that you are allowing to take control of your thoughts.

 

And getting back to this: To me, this means that you completely missed the point of Dr. Sarno's work. You need another way to understand the concepts, and the book I would recommend for you is The Great Pain Deception by @Steve Ozanich, (a friend of the forum). For one thing, he brilliantly explains how Freud's theories mesh with with the TMS concept. Dr. Sarno was the one who originally went back to Freud, but Steve does a better job explaining the connection, and the significance.

To address your two statements specifically:

1. You don't need to change your life in order to accept your life and, most importantly, your role in your life. Right now you are hating on yourself for your situation. You can't recover if you don't love yourself enough to know that you deserve to recover. The first thing you need to love yourself for is being here, right now, exploring the TMS concept!

2. You're already sad and depressed, my friend! That's what your TMS symptoms are covering up! You have to be willing to take the risk and look at the repressed emotions that your brain thinks are too dangerous for you to acknowledge. You look at them, you acknowledge their right to exist, and you accept yourself for having them. And you let go of the power that the fear of those emotions currently has over you. Steve O will explain this to you.

3. Finally, be patient and be open-minded. You don't understand TMS enough right now to be able to accept it - and without acceptance, you can't recover. But acceptance is simply a state of mind - and our minds can change - all it takes is a moment of insight, followed by acceptance.

Check out my tagline.

 

These are my all-time favorite resources:

The Divided Mind by Dr. John Sarno (plus six other health professionals weighing in)
The Great Pain Deception by Steve Ozanich
Hope & Help For Your Nerves by Claire Weekes (for anxiety)
Meditations to Change Your Brain (audio program) by Richard Mendius, MD and Rick Hanson, PhD

The first four of these helped me save my own life back in 2011 (8 years ago!) I also did the SEP - our Structured Educational Program. Since then, we also have Alan Gordon's Recovery Program, graciously donated to us by Alan.

These podcasts are helping me stay on target or pull myself out of relapses when they happen. These are tough times, TMS is clearly epidemic (scarily, among so many young people now!) and we all need all the help we can get. Fortunately, the resources out there are almost unlimited, including these two brilliant people:
The Cure For Chronic Pain, a podcast by @Nicole J. Sachs LCSW
The Mind and Fitness Podcast, by @LindenSwole, aka Eddy Lindenstein

And let's not forget our own Success Stories subforum. Anyone who is struggling needs to go to the earliest post on that subforum, and start reading. Read one or two a day (some are very long, but well worth the time spent), so that you can truly absorb the wealth of experience and advice in each story. Each story is as unique as each human being that has ever lived is unique. Have faith that you WILL find at least one story that resonates with you, and you will find at least one element in each story that does the same.

The Divided Mind, Hope & Help For Your Nerves, and Meditations To Change Your Brain are all available at my local library, but it's a multi-branch city one, so that might not be true for everyone. Amazon will have used copies of many books. Podcasts are accessed using a podcast app on your phone or computer.

 

Thank you so much!

 

FYI - pain is mostly gone today. Moved to my right side at one point this morning. It comes and goes when I think about it but it moves around. The mind is freaky - and when in the disease it is hard to climb out!

 

Good advice here but I think you also have to be kind to yourself. Besides your pain you presumably suffer from anxiety since you take an anti-depressant. Anxiety is fear. You wouldn't tell a fearful child to suck it up and not give in to the symptoms. You would comfort and soothe them. This is something that many with TMS don't know how to do. They instead threaten and pressure themselves unknowingly. Alan Gordon touches on this a lot in his recovery program and it was a big focus of my therapy as well.

With regards to what happened to you when you tried to go off Paxil, I can relate. I had a hellish experience getting off Effexor. It made me hypomanic and my Dr. was extremely negligent which just triggered a lot of stuff from childhood. When I didn't recuperate fast enough I was misdiagnosed with bipolar 2. Luckily I resisted more drugs and did a lot of therapy and self care and it eventually passed.

If you've never suffered from bipolar symptoms previously then likely the mania was just a withdrawal reaction (it's actually called hypomania). DO NOT let this bipolar diagnosis be another thing you fear! Doctors are great at instilling us with fear. When you decide to go off the drugs, do it very, very, very slowly to give your brain a chance to start working normally again. It is a myth that antidepressants cure a chemical imbalance in your brain. They actually cause a chemical imbalance by hijacking your brain's functioning, so when you go off them quickly the brain hasn't regained it's normal functioning and the drugs aren't their either so you can have severe symptoms.

 

Yes hypomania is right. He doesn’t necessarily think I’m bipolar but I’ve been cycling like crazy as a result of the SSRI. I believe he wants to stabilize me on the lamictal and then consider tapering the SSRIs. Then taper the lamictal. I had to go back on the SSRI due to withdrawal and that adjustment is keeping me hypomanic at times. I also have two genetic markers that signal bipolar. This new doc would not have given me these meds but it’s been 16-17 years.

Each time I step down, my left side goes into overdrive. Today is day 5 going from 10mg brand name lexapro to 10 mg generic lexapro - and it’s clearly a bit weaker. I’m more obsessive compulsive and my left foot is all pins and needles and tingling. This happens every adjustment down. I just hope it goes away when my mind adjusts to the slightly weaker dosage.