Q&A: How do I overcome initial unconscious resistance to "the work"?

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Question

Here's the thing. My full story was posted in a thread in the General Discussion forum. I'm at the beginning of my first journey with this beast which has taken about 7 months; I haven't experienced true pain free and emotionally light episodes; though I have made some discoveries about myself very recently through therapeutic journalling (i.e., trying to communicate with the child that I was). I don't know if this is generalizable to other TMSers, but I feel that I'm pushing against a large degree of unconscious resistance to the journey. How do I push past calendar watching, severe doubts/worry and obsessive fear? Concrete advice would be helpful as I do tend to think concretely
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Answer by Frances Sommer Anderson, PhD

An image of Frances Anderson, PhD

Fran Anderson's Profile Page / Bio Page / Psychophysiologic Disorders Association (PPDA) Board Member

Dear Seeker,

I haven't read your full story but have a few comments that I hope will be useful in what can be a challenging "journey with this beast."

1. The discoveries you've made through therapeutic journalling will most likely be invaluable in working with the unconscious resistance you mention. In my view, resistance is part of being human and a way of protecting us from whatever feelings are intolerable. Even physical pain can be "unconsciously preferable" to emotions that the child within you may have had to repress in order to survive. I encourage you to respect the resistance when you notice it. Sometimes I recommend that people say something like, "Thank you, resistance/pain for alerting me that I need to tune in to what's upsetting me now!"

2. If you have not been given a diagnosis by a TMS-qualified physician, I encourage you to seek a consultation. Sometimes people discover that there are subtle questions about the diagnosis lurking, even if the person thinks that they believe that the TMS diagnosis is accurate.

3. While you want to experience freedom from pain, I encourage you to notice if you're putting pressure on yourself to be pain free as soon as possible. Of course you want to be free of pain but sometimes people can actually be creating pressure on themselves to be pain free as soon as possible or within a certain time frame. They can actually feel like a failure because they're not making progress as quickly as possible.

4. Keep trying to connect with that child within, noticing all of your adult reactions to the child. Sometimes people find it difficult to be patient and compassionate with that child because they didn't experience that from important authority figures when they were a child.

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