Roughly 6 years ago, I began my recovery from alcoholism. Part of that process was attending Alcoholics Anonymous and working the well established 12 step recovery program. Whether you're familiar with AA or not, you probably recognize the first of the 12 steps - admitting that you have a problem. No recovery can take place unless the alcoholic is able to fully come to terms with the reality that he is in fact an alcoholic. This is profoundly difficult for many people, even in the face of overwhelming evidence. Even once we accept it, we must be reminded again and again, day after day, one meeting after the next. We remind ourselves and each other. It has to be drilled into our alcoholic brains through repetition, reinforcement and by sharing stories with one another. Much as I initially had trouble accepting the fact that I am an alcoholic, I'm having trouble accepting the reality that I have TMS. I can accept it intellectually, but I can't yet BELIEVE it. Alan Gordon makes a very astute observation regarding acceptance on the conscious level vs the gut level. He is right - there is a BIG difference! I'm hoping that by working the structured educational program, journaling, reading, and rehashing all the evidence against there being a structural cause for my pain, I can eventually expect for the reality of my diagnosis to sink in. I would love any encouragement regarding tools of reinforcement that some of you have used to accept your diagnosis. I would also welcome reading about struggles and doubt, either past or present. Thanks!