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Relapse AND symptom imperative...

Discussion in 'Support Subforum' started by Ludmilla, Aug 29, 2019.

  1. Ludmilla

    Ludmilla Peer Supporter

    Hi everyone, this is my first post here. I'm a 27-year-old woman and I've discovered Dr. Sarno's work almost a year ago, but didn't really get into it until last February. At the time I had been struggling with sciatica in my right leg for 4 months. In one week of reading, the pain disappeared, and I was ecstatic.

    Now, I've been dealing with a lot of chronic pain since I was 20, which was attributed to malocclusion (been operated for prognathia at 20), scoliosis, etc. I've spent thousands of euros in doctor visits, scans, acupuncture, osteopathy, naturopathy, physical therapy, supplements... over the years (I also have PCOS, which, of course, ups the costs). I had some minor improvements, but it wouldn't last - you know the drill. Here is the list of all the problems I have outside of PCOS :
    - (mild) lumbagos 3 to 4 times a year ;
    - low back pain ;
    - weird tendinitis in the arms, wrists, legs, feet ;
    - IBS ;
    - knee pain when running or doing tai chi ;
    - (mild) acne on my face and my back ;
    - tinnitus (to be fair, I wear ear plugs every night because my neighbour is really noisy and I'm really sensitive to noise, and I have to go the doctor 1 or 2 times a year to extract ceramen blocks causes by this) ;
    - tooth sensibility ;
    - dust allergy ;
    - headaches ;
    - lot of fatigue ;
    - eczema (didn't have any for some years now) ;
    - heartburn-type pain for some months now ;
    - on the psychological level : OCD, anxiety, was really depressed a few years ago but way better now, hypersensitivity.

    Yeah, I'm like the poster child for TMS;), and I may be forgetting some other things. After getting rid of sciatica, I went running a few times and I've been able to make the knee pain go away by the good ol' shouting-at-your-brain-method. I thought, Great, now I'm gonna apply this to my other issues, especially IBS which is a pain in the ass (and I mean it both metaphorically and literaly :D).

    It seemed to work at first, but then I developed heartburn. Forward to July this year, and with the holidays some of my back and sciatica issues came back, although less than it was before, and now I have IBS AND heartburn.

    I totally believe in the TMS theory but I guess I'm slowly getting discouraged... I can't seem to get rid of the pain. Plus, I would like to go running and exercising, because it really helped me get past the fear, but I'm currently really anemic (heavy periods these last months) and too tired to do so. I've been seeing a psychologist and psychotherapist last year, but I feel like I've not a lot more to talk about. I'm a very introspective person, and I understand where all this unconscious fear and anxiety come from, but... well, I feel stuck.

    I was thinking of doing the Pain Recovery Program. If any of you has any suggestion...
    Last edited: Aug 29, 2019
  2. plum

    plum Beloved Grand Eagle

    You’ve kinda answered your own questions. Once you’ve tried (and failed) with standard and alternative methods, then ruminated intensely on your self and your life, the only other thing left is to simply get on with your life. I’m serious. A great many of us get snared where you are. It’s no fun. Often it’s expensive, time-consuming not fun.

    Get thee to the Success Forum. Read a few stories about peeps who have overcome TMS. Sometimes you need to lubricate the psychological joints with a decent salve of hope, joy and optimism. I’ll throw in some love for you too ❤️

    Plum x
  3. JanAtheCPA

    JanAtheCPA Beloved Grand Eagle

    Indeed, I agree (as usual :)) with @plum, in prescribing love. I was actually wondering, reading your post, how much self-love and self-nurturing you have practiced in doing all this work? I myself didn't really turn the corner until I was able to soften and open and really get in touch with myself as a little girl, one who was awkward and shy and felt isolated, as the oldest of four children. I had a great upbringing, but I think that at age four or five, I was kind of on my own as my mother was dealing with two younger kids and another on the way. Back in earlier days here on the forum we had a couple of call-in webinars with Alan Gordon, and those were instrumental in helping me to open up and get in touch with that little girl who wanted to be the only child once again, being nurtured by her mother.

    I'm thinking of "something completely different" for you - here are some suggestions:

    Anything to do with self-acceptance - one of the go-to books is Radical Self-Acceptance, by Tara Brach, although I've never read that one.

    Existential Psychotherapy - a pretty simple concept, which breaks down our emotions into four categories, representing the core human issues: Isolation, Freedom, Meaning, and Mortality. This has proven really incredibly helpful for me, in order to process several personal losses in 2012 and 2014 (Isolation, Mortality, and Meaning) and in dealing with the fact that I'm within a couple of years of being 70 (Mortality, Isolation, Freedom). It could easily be applied to any age or life stage or life change. It's just really helpful to recognize the importance of these four things as they relate to the really strong emotions and fears that we experience on a regular basis.

    Meditations To Change Your Brain - an educational audio program with Richard Mendius, MD and Rick Hanson, PhD, explaining how our brains are wired to keep us in fear, and how to re-wire them.

    And, these days, more and more people are recommending that for mental health, we need to cut way back on smart phone use, social media, and the news.
  4. Baseball65

    Baseball65 Beloved Grand Eagle

    My son who is exactly your age is having the same symptom order. He just beat back an attempted sciatica breaK OUT, but it switched into a horrible heartburn episode. He is aware of the mechanism behind it, but he has never gone in depth (yet) to have to come up with a better strategy than knowing it's psychogenic in origin.
    A lot of the younger Tms-ers I have spoke with lately have had the same issue 'Hey... this used to go away really easy with me just being aware...why is it so sticky this time?'
    The only thing I can guess is since our unconscious is a 'prison' as Freud and Sarno call it, the prison is getting over populated and might require some different management.
    As Jan just mentioned, cutting back on media. Doing a little more thorough work. Trying the SEP. It is still just TMS but your salad days might be over!
    It still doesn't take THAT long and the personal growth we get from the introspection far outweighs the extra time we might spend working on it. It is a very, very annoying blessing.

    but it will go away
    MWsunin12 likes this.
  5. Ludmilla

    Ludmilla Peer Supporter

    Thank you all for your kind answers, I needed it ! The pain in my leg is still stubborn... But I really feel how much it's linked to emotional overload.

    I took an appointment with my psychotherapist tomorrow night, and when I come back from work tonight I'll begin the SEP. And, yeah, cutting back on media is a good idea. I don't use a lot of it but I look at some news pertaining to women's rights and ecology, and it breaks my heart every time to see what's happening in this world.

    Baseball65, seems your son and I have exactly the same problems than me, indeed! Best wishes to him

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