Reading Sarno and symptoms getting more intense.

Am at the end of my tether. Around two years ago started new, albeit intense, job and at the same time turned 50 (which really didn't bother me). Then 'fell in love' and started applying to do a Masters (which I recently completed). So far so familiar? Soon after all these events two years ago, for no apparent reason, severe back pain and foot drop. MRI - herniated discs surgery recommend. Instead went to chiropractor. So far so familiar? Discovered Sarno and noticed some changes but probably not convinced regarding the TMS theory. Nevertheless, more recently, re-reading Sarno books - including divided mind. Noticed better walking and less pressure on back foot etc, but then symptoms get worse. Pressure on back and feeling in my foot like concrete. Notice other things, however. Wake up and dull ache in buttocks and then the other morning pain in arm. Just getting fed up - really need to believe that it's a mind thing but can't help thinking that it's not. Help!

 

Hi Cris - and welcome to the forum!

It sounds like your brain is fighting back against your new level of knowledge and belief - and your brain is a tricky devil! It is also very strong in asserting its primitive survival function. It really wants you to stay in negative territory, scanning for danger, and staying on your toes by worrying about shallow concerns (like pain) instead of wallowing in deeper emotional concerns (like aging).

When I read in The Divided Mind that aging is a source of deep emotional rage, I practically yelled out loud "Holy crap - that's me!" LOL. Intellectually I knew I was worried about growing old, but good lord - we are surrounded by a culture that says we can (and should) age gracefully, and that never discusses the unfairness of death; and we have a medical culture that refuses to accept the inevitability of death and is dedicated to fighting it with everything they can throw at it. Ugh. No wonder it's a source of rage.

Just sayin' - since you brought it up

Anyways... you've read the books, which is the first step. If the choice to have or not have surgery is not an urgent life-or-death matter, you have to ask if you can harm yourself by putting it off and taking the TMS route. If you want to proceed with TMS, I would recommend checking out the free SEP (Structured Educational Program) on the main wiki (tmswiki.org) and start doing that. We have two other programs generously donated by Alan Gordon, including his new comprehensive step-by-step program, with dedicated forum threads.

Also, you'll want to check out Dr. David Hanscom, MD - a back surgeon at the highly-reputable Swedish Hospital in Seattle. His program is called Back In Control - and he has also graciously allowed us to repost his blog posts on our forum (go to the profile of, and look for content by "member" Back In Control Blog)

It's essential to start with the book knowledge, but most of us need more in order to find the path to recovery. I would also highly recommend reading the stories that are posted on our Success Stories subforum. They are pretty amazing. You'll probably find descriptions that fit your situation.

Good luck!

~Jan

 

Thank you. Two years ago the doctor said that the surgery was not essential but better to have it done "sooner, rather than later." and requested that I return in six weeks - which I didn't.