My story / asking for feedback

Hello, I am from Germany - so please forgive my english which might not be perfect.

I would love to have a feedback on my situation, as I am dealing with debilitating symptoms for a year now. I try to summarize:

Everything started actually 1,5 years ago, in spring we went for three month on a surfing trip to spain. On the 3 day drive from Germany to spain I developed some knee pain (understandable). After some weeks I suddendly had burning muscle pain on my upper legs at night, sleeping the rest of the time on a very hard bed helped the problem a bit . At this time I was mentally very happy (surfing in Spain) and had no explication regarding this burning pain, except vaccination and covid, which I had both in the beginning of the year.
My knees went better, still had some problems playing soccer.

In late summer my father died within 3 weeks very surprisingly. After this a downward spiral began: After running for some relief, my knee pain started intensly again and never resolved until today. Looking into that a doctor said besides some small athritis my knee is fine, but he stated that I need a hip replacement (which turned out to be totally wrong). Afther the death of my father and this diagnosis, I went down a spiral with more stress, panic and symptoms (my legs burned as hell, my neck and upper back tightend, I got tinitus and then in the beginning of this year neurological problems - sometimes I felt drunk, dizzy, certain movements I almost blacked out), got pain all over my body, especially problems with muscles and joints. I was constantly looking for answers, went e.g. after lyme disease (which is very contraversial) which I was tested postive as well.

After a lot of treatments (I did everything possible - antibiotics, supplements, massage, accupuncture, cleansing&detox, massage, pyhsiotherapie, rife machine, and a a lot more) I am finally getting better, far away from feeling healthy. My neurological symtoms (fatigue, diziness etc..) improved a lot, my physical symptoms not so much - I still feel a lot of knee pain, muscle and tendon pain, I feel like my neck and beck is very stiff and making a lot of cracking noises when moving etc...).

About two month ago I heared about TMS, but I am constantly falling back and forth in my head if I have e.g. some lyme bacteria or virus eating up my body, or if my brain is just going crazy.

Why I think it is NOT TMS:

- It all started in Spain (burning muscle pain), when I had a really great time surfing at the beach - no stress at all
- I had stress before in my life, but never ever something comparable to this symptoms
- My knee pain is really bad, I always have a stiff knee waiking up, I feel some structural resistence bending it. Is it possible that TMS does something like this?
- some symptoms are really stable (knee pain, tissue problems in neck/back, tinitus)

Why I think it could be TMS:
- Symptoms really kicked off with stress (death of my father, wrong diagnosis of artificial hip)
- I really really panicked a lot with all of this crazy symptoms / always had a lot of fear that my life will never be the same again
- burning pain really jumps around crazy (foot, hips, back, arms, scatia etc..)

I am really happy for any feedback

 

any feedback?

 

Hi @nico87
Your symptoms sound very much like they are tms to me because there are so many. Many times the first symptom you notice seems “structural” like knee pain, and you should definitely have a Dr. check the knee to make sure there is no structural damage - you did the right thing.
Tinnitus and the stiff muscles “tension” is such a physical manifestation of stress. You mention it began with having the best time of your life and you did not notice stress. Unrecognized anxiety.
Others have mentioned that they get pain on vacation. I think it can occur for many reasons but the main point of TMS is, is that this is subconsciously generated, so you won’t really know why.
The most important things are to begin educating yourself about pain. Dr. Sarno’s books are most likely translated into German. Reading one will help you understand TMS more.
This website has two free programs at tmswiki.org and the Structured Educational Program will slowly take you through lessons to learn to help yourself.
Here are two TMS coaches in Germany: https://www.painreprocessingtherapy.com/directory-health_coach/?filter_global%5B%5D=756&filter=1&sort=location_address&num=50 (Health Coach Directory - Pain Reprocessing Therapy Institute)

This should link two trained psychologists in Germany: https://www.painreprocessingtherapy.com/clinician-directory/?filter_global%5B%5D=125&filter=1&sort=location_address&num=50 (Mental Health Clinician Directory - Pain Reprocessing Therapy Institute)

You can choose to do the program and read the Sarno book yourself or get help from a psychologist.

Like you, I have had many many symptoms. They can change, sometimes return then go away again fairly quickly. Dr. Sarno reassures is that TMS can not hurt us, and to think psychological!