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Day 10 Hidden emotions

Discussion in 'Structured Educational Program' started by Fabi, Mar 22, 2016.

  1. Fabi

    Fabi Well known member

    I do have some doubts about the TMS approach and as suggested I will write about them here.
    My migranes are permanent. They don´t give me a break. Does that mean I need to be permanently distracted?
    If my neck vertebrae cause me pain, because they are painful when I touch them, if I look down I get immediately dizzy, is that still TMS?

    My hidden feelings are towards noone that is relevant. I am even opening to the group of mothers at my son´s school and receiving some support on the phone.
    One of the hardest things is the isolation I feel. I thought I had a few friends. I thought your parents would pick up the phone.
    I feel very sad today. I don´t hide my emotions at home. I cry in front of my son if I feel like, and I tell him it´s ok.
    Maybe my hidden emotions post should read "repressed emotions" because I haven´t been able to express my anger to my family. And I doubt I will, it will be the journaling that will do it. I fear the anger in myself. I fear it will consume me, it will eat me alive.
     
  2. Walt Oleksy

    Walt Oleksy Beloved Grand Eagle

    Hi, Fabi. I'm sorry that your parents won't talk to you about your emotional problems. They probably have their own which is causing TMS pain.

    Try writing your parents a letter, writing about everything you'd like to tell them, but don't send it. Put it in a drawer or the refrigerator to keep it "alive."
    No need to tear it up.

    I am 85 and have fewer friends than ever. They pass on or move away. I have relatives but they very seldom visit me or call. Everyone these days wants to stay home and have others visit them instead of going out and visiting.

    Try not to let anger consume you. Don't be angry at yourself. Forgive others and yourself... it relieves emotional stress.

    Distractions help a lot. Also try calming teas or hot milk. Deep breathing is always helpful, as is laughing,. Don't watch tv news or the stupid shows that are not funny or are so violent. I like Youtube videos on my computer... there are some very relaxing meditation videos free.

    Try to do pleasant things with your son... watch funny tv or Youtube videos with him, work picture puzzles.

    Try head massages for your migraine headaches. Youtube has some very good ones.
     
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  3. Walt Oleksy

    Walt Oleksy Beloved Grand Eagle

    Hi again, Fabi.

    Someone else posted today with concerns similar to you. I like the way she's handling them:

    Today was considerably better for my right hand than yesterday. I laughed at the pain. I really just said "pffft" to it whenever it tried to cross my mind. It takes a certain strength to do that, because the pain also has its own will. But I want to show the pain in my right hand who has the upper hand.

    I began to read. The Mind Body Prescription by Dr. Sarno last night. Something he said struck me deeply. He said that when he felt the symptoms of his Migraine coming on (the "lights"), he sat down and tried to think of what was making him angry. Even though the fact that he couldn't think of anything that made him angry, the pain vanished, because he acknowledged that an emotion was behind it.

    Part of the healing for me will be acknowledging that repressed, dangerous emotions are creating the symptoms which result in the diagnosis of TMS. Accepting the diagnosis means, then, acknowledging the emotions that cause the pain.

    Emotions are terrifying to me. I try not to think about them. The reason I decided to do this structured program is because, if I do not make a commitment to uncovering what is eating at me, I will simply move on once I achieve even a partial remission of pain.
     
    Fabi likes this.
  4. Fabi

    Fabi Well known member

    Walt
    Dealing with abuse and neglecting attitudes from my parents is wat keeps me in therapy at l think
    Repressed doesn't' mean they don't know, they just won't take responsibility and that is very infuriating to me. Of course it is not addressed to me, it's their attitude to everyone, my brother and l are just the ones who grew up like this.
    I tried talking to my father a few years ago. He took it as if l was attacking him by asking him to respect me as a grown woman. With my mother it is an absolute waste of time and energy, Andy made me a suggestion last week, to just say "l don't want your presence" and it worked just fine. Now she is after my brother and me with other means, but it is clear for me how to respond
    One day, l will write and maybe scream out my feelings, the ones l am holding down. But l need not be alone for that.
    As far as pain today l received my first mtadona dose, not very high, from a very understanding doctor, and even if l don't expect the pain to go away, l know l am listening to me differently, my body speaks, l don't want to shut it down, l want it to relax a bit, desensitization l think is the term.
    Thank you for your suggestions and keeping me in mind
    I will go on with the sep tomorrow
     

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