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Flare & Emotions

Discussion in 'General Discussion Subforum' started by Paigeee, Apr 17, 2018.

  1. Paigeee

    Paigeee Peer Supporter

    Hi everyone,

    I'm in the midst of a TMS flare and while I'm new to the concept of TMS, I know this is what I have. Leading up to this current flare, I was having immense feelings of rage and sadness about an emotionally abusive relationship I was in. Coupled with this, I had pent up feelings of fear about a flare up happening again. On top of this, I also had feelings of deep guilt from another incident that had recently happened in my life. All of these emotions seemed to combine and put me in the current flare I'm in.

    How do you guys push past focusing on the pain in order to focus on the real issues--the emotions?
  2. KevinB

    KevinB Well known member

    Ahhh, the million dollar question. I thought I had a grasp on this before, but being that I too am in the midst of a particularly nasty flare up, I think maybe I don't have such a good handle on it.
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  3. Paigeee

    Paigeee Peer Supporter

    It's difficult, isn't it? I find it interesting that the mind becomes used to feeling good, thinking it can handle the next flare-up, and then, (in my case) TOTALLY freaking out when the flare actually happens. It's like I have all this obvious info in front of me that it's TMS, yet I still have bouts of doubt that lead to nothing but more fear. I feel like these flares happen for a reason though, as a way to teach me how to reign in the pain and become even more adept at handling the nature of TMS.
    Time2be likes this.
  4. plum

    plum Beloved Grand Eagle


    We learn to self-soothe. I'll pop a link to a post I wrote on this at the end of my reply.

    Your question is posed in a way that suggests you are thinking along lines that are pure Sarno. This does not work for everyone. I was one of these people so I have great empathy and insight into the many road blocks we can hit on our healing journey.

    Have you taken the time to mindfully explore Alan Gordon's new program?

    http://www.tmswiki.org/forum/painrecovery/ (Pain Recovery Program)

    It's brilliant and has greater healing potential than just the emotional because it is neuropsychologically based.

    Here is the link:

    http://www.tmswiki.org/forum/threads/day-2-the-nature-of-pain.16429/#post-85578 (New Program - Day 2: The Nature of Pain)

    Plum x
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  5. Time2be

    Time2be Well known member

    Me too! Same here. Astonishing that a flare freaks me out. I had many and should know better. And the process is usually that I at some point take myself serious and I journal a bit, relax to meditations, but I also try to do good things in my life. I did parts of Gordon’s program. Maybe should follow it religiously... I am considering.
    Last edited: Apr 20, 2018
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  6. Paigeee

    Paigeee Peer Supporter

    Thank you so much for the links, I will definitely look into them. :)
    plum likes this.
  7. Huckleberry

    Huckleberry Well known member

    I think it’s a bit of a paradox. My chronic pain life is either in one of three stages.

    Stage one will see me relatively pain free. During this period I will sort of forget about pain and TMS and just live my life the way I’ve been been living for the past 50 years. The way that has probably got me into the position I find myself.

    Stage two sees me with that elevated back burner niggle. It’s not a flare and it’s not cripplingly painful. It’s an annoyance and a constant bugbear. During this period I will be stressed and irritable and will imagine this is life going forward...I will be watchful and I will be monitoring just waiting for this to become the inevitable full on flare.

    Stage three is the flare. During this period I withdraw from life at first and become despondent and defeated. After a couple of days I will read some TMS literature and probably visit here then I’ll decide to get all Zen Buddhist on the pains arse. I’ll journal, mediate, relax and be mindful etc...in short over a few days I’ll chuck every TMS treatment protocol at the pain in desperation. At some point the flare will slowly subside.

    Of course, this is a rinse and repeat process. I know that what I need to be doing is actually living the TMS process authentically 24/7 in my life and not just turning to it in desperation. I think that TMS is something that is best dealt with when we feel good...it’s how we live our lives in those moments that actually determine our future pain. Easier said than done. Belief is all and authenticity is key.
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  8. Time2be

    Time2be Well known member

    Gosh! Exactly the same here. Couldn’t I said better. Three stages, yes, the second one is most denial (it will go over ...).
    Paigeee likes this.
  9. plum

    plum Beloved Grand Eagle

    Angel, with Alan's program pay particular attention to cognitive soothing and somatic tracking. They are hand in glove and somatic tracking is the Master Key to Healing. With regular patient and compassionate practice you learn not to freak out over flare-ups and such and this dramatically calms your body and mind, and therefore your pain, suffering, anxiety etc.

    Cognitive soothing and somatic tracking are essentially the neuro-psychological take on Claire Weekes so it is definitely worth listening to and/or reading her when things get rough.

    Plum x
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  10. Time2be

    Time2be Well known member

    Thanks Plum, what you are saying is that regular practice is important. And this is exactly what my brain tries to circumvent. I can be very disciplined and ‘regular’ at work. Now I start to understand that it is self compassion I am lacking. I will do the program. This time not half hearted. I listen Claire Weekes sometimes. I love her voice, intonation and the compassion that she radiates. Thank Plum! Your comments are always to the point and unbelievably sympathetic!
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