Day 9 Emotions Flooding Out

Hi All
Today has been an interesting day in my journey. I had written about two stressful events in my past when I was 10 years old and I decided to share them with my psychologist last week and my physical therapist today. Both are ardent believers in what they call MBS (mind body syndrome).

When I read my journal out loud to them I was overcome with emotion I was choked up and started crying and crying.
I was a bit embarrassed. They both told me that crying was a good thing and I am letting out emotions that have been pent up for almost 40 years.

Can anyone provide me with reassurance that this is what is supposed to happen?

In addition I saw my physiatrist today (rehabilitation medical doctor) and he told me that he believed in MBS as well especially in my case. That was somewhat reassuring.

Thanks
Steve

 

I believe it is supposed to happen. Have you read Mindbody Prescription? Dr. Sarno talks about a woman who was abused as a child and her emotions come up all at once. In fact, she was saying things she would say as if she was a child again. Remember Dr. Sarno says that the unconscious has to frame of reference to time? I hope that reassures you a little. I think you are lucky. I wish my emotions would come out.

 

Awesome going Steve! I look forward to reading further on your story.

 

It's normal. I always knew I had some anger about my upbringing, but when I started the SEP, I was surprised at how much sadness I had. I always considered myself very happy and optimistic. This was a good lesson you learned about yourself.

 

Steve,

The great thing about tms healing is that there are no *oughts* or *shoulds* and while this may prove initially tricky for people who have managed their emotions like a drill sergeant, it ultimately liberates.

Crying is beautiful and one of the most healing acts we can summon. To have our wounds witnessed by another (as you did today) adds yet more power to the process. To weep openly is an amazing thing to do in our culture and while you may have been embarrassed (your ego asserts itself), what you actually did was very brave. That self-same courage and vulnerability will serve you well in your healing.

By the sounds of it you have a good team of supporters and this really helps. You have the people here as well.

To answer the heart of your question, yes. We begin to recognise trauma for what it is, and to feel the awful pain, which may or may not be diluted with time. It is not necessary to do this to heal and I say this lest someone lose themselves seeking the wound or the emotion that represents the genesis of tms. It is a terribly common error and wastes much time. It really is enough to know you have tms. The digging is optional.

We each carve our own path. What all tms'ers share in common is that we learn to feel again, to trust ourselves, to honour our emotions. We learn to live.

 

I was actually just re-reading the TMS Recovery Program tonight, and Alan Gordon talks about the importance of feeling your feelings, not just trying to come to a logical conclusion about why you are feeling a certain way. He says we develop our symptoms because we aren't feeling our feelings, not because we don't know what are feelings are. I think that allowing yourself to cry means that you are truly letting yourself feel. Repression is what got us here. Rather than feeling embaressed, think of what you would say to your inner child...if you saw your own child upset and crying, you would hug them or rock them and tell them it's going to be okay... You can say the same to yourself.

 

We all find our own way to TMS healing. I healed from severe back pain by believing 100 percent it was from repressed emotions. I journaled about my life and discovered that I had been repressing anger going back to when I was seven years old and my parents divorced. Now pain-free, I learned from TMS that meditation is very relaxing. I high recommend it, especially the Relaxation Response...

The RR is a wonderful way to practice TMS Mindbody Healing because it changes harmful thinking in the subconscious mind which Dr. John Sarno says causes pain that is not caused by anything structural.

The RR, practiced once or twice a day for 10, 15, or 20 minutes has a profound positive effect on the subconscious mind, relieving or curing everything from anxiety, hypertension, headaches, fatigue, nervousness, dizziness, high blood pressure, insomnia, stomach problems, all forms of pain including backaches, abdominal pain, muscle pain, neck, arm, and leg pain, and relieves side affects from cancer and AIDS.

RR is like Transcendental Meditation which is taught by TM specialists who charge hundreds or thousands of dollars. But the RR is free and you can do it yourself.

It is practiced before a meal. I do it in bed before arising in the morning and again in bed before falling sleep. Often, I only do it 5 or 10 minutes and it works to calm me and put me to sleep.

Just sit in a chair (or lie in bed in the morning or at bedtime), close your eyes, don’t listen to any music, and try to avoid outside noises. Let your mind think of a word such as

"One " which has no real meaning or association. Or say a calming word such as “Calm” or “Peace,” or add the faith or spiritual element by saying a favorite religious word or prayer. Breathe naturally or incorporate Deep Breathing by breathing in through the mouth to inflate the stomach, suck in the stomach while holding the breath for a few seconds, then say the word when you exhale through the mouth.

Say the word silently over and over. At the end of the 10 to 20 minutes, picture and feel yourself as you were when you felt your best, and in a place where you felt that way.

When distracting thoughts arise during the RR, as they will, just tell yourself, “Oh, well,” and go back to repeating your chosen word.

My "word" is a prayer: "God loves me and is protecting me." I say it a few times and go right to sleep. If my mind wanders onto other things, I tell myself"Oh, well," and repeat my mantra silently while deep breathing.

There are several free videos on Youtube about the Relaxation Response. I especially recommend these two by Dr. Benson:





and this one which can put you to sleep:



and

 

Thank you for sharing this comment-- I had lost sight of this import piece. For the past few weeks I've struggled with a re-lapse of pain and I have been telling myself logically what I am thinking without actually allowing myself to *feel* the feelings. I knew this was important, but I'd forgotten and let it slide. I thought to myself, "I'm stressed because of a, b, and c, and that's why I'm in pain," and then felt frustrated because the pain continued. Time to allow myself to start feeling a, b and c.

 

No worries...unfortunately I think the harder part is actually feeling them. I struggle with this myself. In many of Alan Gordon's recorded sessions, he tries to get the patients to express how the emotion feels. For example, being angry often feels hot, being sad feels heavy, etc...and I agree with this... but it's difficult for me to pinpoint the physical feelings I have from my other emotions, such as my stress/anxiety. I feel like I feel stressed all day, so is there is another way I'm supposed to feel my stress, if that makes sense?

 

Ha I agree Ines! I don't cry, haven't been able or want to about my past I guess I feel like it's in the past why get upset about it. But today after listening to gingers interview I felt sad for her as she was crying and it helped me to cry, I took advantage of this sadness I felt for her and journaled about one of my past issues. Good method worked for me