Day 6 Anger and resource day

Fabi

Well known member
Today I went on journaling. I picked an issue that has brought me physical pain all my life, my teeth, mouth, swallowing deficit (?), orthodontic treatments, facial pain, connected with the issue I journalled about yesterday.

I journaled for about 20 minutes and I almost broke the pen. I made a whole in the paper. I was so angry my anger travelled through my arm.
I violently closed my notebook and went out on purpose. I had arranged to do some shopping, but i just had to move. I did the shopping and went to the park, I walked two blocks. I had not done that in a month. I felt very strange. I was like walking, feeling dizzy and at the same time not caring, knowing I was ok!!!!!!!!!

Later, I did this self massage

I only learned about this technique a week ago. I tried it and it works!!! It changes my physiology. I am so happy.
This morning I had a chat with a psychologist who has been trained with these mind body techniques. She suggested sekf gigong massage and group meditation as well (Dojo Zen) . A few blocks away from home!. She knows about Sarno, not in detail. So there are resources around me. She emphasized sitting and breathing and focusing a little on making the exalation a bit longer every time, eyes opened

She asked me very interesting questions and stopped my mind a thousand times during the hour. I need to stop my mind! She was relentless. She said you need to sit and be with yourself twice a day. And journal, first thing in the morning, three pages, anything.

We did an exercise together that left me looking at things I need without even realizing when I wrote them I do need them:

1. Nurture me
2. Accept and love me.
3. Live!
4. Decide and do!
5. Laugh

So much to add to the lists I enjoy! I also need and want these things!

Thanks to this forum.
May I be safe. May I be free from suffering. May I have the courage to accept myself just as I am.
 
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Hi, Fabi. Consider yourself hugged. You are doing great. Taking the walk and ignoring the pain and dizziness is wonderful. I hope you can do a little each day, maybe a little longer. Your positive affirmations are wonderful. I especially like the LAUGH. I had a rough morning and wanted to scream but instead, I laughed. Not pain, just daily problems causing anxiety. Laughing made me realize it's not fatal.
 
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