Samwise
New Member
Hello everyone, it's truly a pleasure to get to meet everyone here and lately I've been struggling so much with all the pain and symptoms being thrown at me. I'm a 26 year old guy who is in pharmacy school, and also engaged to a very supportive and wonderful fiance. But ever since the days I was an undergraduate, I have dealt with a multitude of symptoms that have tested me day in and day out since their onset. It first started about 7 years ago during the middle of my undergrad. The initial onset was when I was simply going shopping, and then all of a sudden it felt like somebody shoved a knife into my knee. I went to several doctors, and they couldn't find anything wrong. So to be on the safe side, I just put a brace on it, and over time the pain subsided. During this same time, I was constantly getting sick with colds every couple of weeks, and I couldn't understand why as I was a healthy guy and always eating right. But I just dismissed it as stress and the fact that I was in huge auditoriums with several hundred people. But then in my 3rd year of undergrad is when my symptoms really took off, which was most likely due to the intensity of the classes picking up, as well as having to do research and work on top of that. In the fall of 2009 I started breaking out in these persistent rashes that just would not go away. They were incredibly itchy and occupied every crevice in my body it seemed like. Eventually they just went away, but it was horrible having to take Hydroxyzine every day to keep down the itching as its a very sedating antihistamine. So after this, I thought I was in the clear as I had nothing go wrong for a few months. However, that took a quick turn. I started developing all these welts on my fingers. But it started on one finger, and then it just keep spreading to the rest of my hand. All the doctors thought they were warts, but they had no idea why they were spreading so fast. So you can imagine how paranoid and anxious I was during this time. But I eventually found that it was the onset of psoriasis, which perplexed me as I've never had a history of any autoimmune conditions, nor any of my family members. So once I accepted that, I developed a cough that persisted for about a month, and this was during fall of 2010. Then once that subsided, I started waking up with these massive headaches in the middle of the night, went from doctor to doctor (as usual), and I couldn't get a clear diagnosis. They kept saying it was infectiona, sinuses, etc... just throwing out random diagnosis because they honestly had no idea. My vision eventually blurred and I was throwing up quite often because the nausea became so intense. But then I was fortunate to have a doctor listen to me about all my problems with anxiety, and she immediately knew that I was clenching my teeth during my sleep and that I just need to relax and get a mouth guard to prevent further damage to my teeth. So a couple days after that resolved, I developed a really bad dry cough that lasted for 3 months. It initially started as bronchitis, but the cough just persisted and would not let up. In the spring of 2010, I developed horrible pelvic pain all of a sudden. I just remember sitting there one night doing some studying, and then WHAM. I had no idea what just happened. My bladder became so painful and all of a sudden I had the worst urinary frequency, just within a couple of minutes. So I saw about 5 different urologists, and of course, nothing showed to give any clear indication of what was going on. I was told it was either interstitial cystitis or chronic prostatitis, and that most likely that they would not resolve any time soon. So this dragged on for a few months, but I noticed that I came closer to graduation, that my pain was subsiding, and then by graduation, my pain was nearly gone. So I decided to take a year off from school, hopefully getting my anxiety and stress under control as the last few years had really taken a lot out of me. I was doing well over that first summer, but then as I inched closer towards the time for pharmacy school interviews, I developed the worst GI pain and nausea. For about two months, I was dry heaving everyday and my intestines just felt like they were on fire. So my fiance one day forced me to go to Disneyland with her because she thought I needed to get out and try and just shake this off, especially as she thought it was anxiety induced. Well, the first few hours I was miserable, but then something odd happened. We were walking down Main Street, and I just said to myself that I will not let this ruin our day. Then as soon as I thought that, the nausea vanished immediately. But then a split second later, all the muscles in my neck just tensed up. So realizing that there was some psychological aspect to this, I did the same thing with that neck and jaw pain, and it subsided. So during the rest of my year off, I had a couple instances of pelvic pain that would last for a few days, but nothing too drastic. However, a few weeks before I started pharmacy school, I noticed that I started getting more tension in my neck. I blew it off, realizing it was just anxiety. But I woke up on July 4, 2012, and noticed my jaw just completely shifted. I couldn't even close my mouth and my ears were just clogged with so much pressure and just constantly popping. Then when pharmacy school started, it just went downhill even further. I developed my pelvic pain again, my mouth went completely dry for about 6 months, and I had this taste of vomit in my mouth that would not leave. So once again, I went back to the doctors, they had no idea what was going on, so they just left me with the diagnosis of having oral thrush. So that definitely added much more anxiety into my life, up to the point where I developed gastritis and lost about 40 pounds as I couldn't eat anything for about a month with having the urge to throw up immediately afterwards. Not being able to handle school and this at the same time, I had to take a leave of absence. But after several months of therapy and injections, all the pain subsided. Although the ear pressure took quite a bit longer to heal and my stomach issues eventually healed. I was doing great during my leave from school up until April of 2013. I was doing some push ups and all of sudden I felt a little pop in my back and my ulnar nerve went immediately numb. It took a couple of months, but eventually I just accepted it, and the numbness subsided and I was back to normal. So here I go back into school thinking I was completely cured of everything. How naive i was 
Within a week of starting school, my neck and jaw muscles started to completely spasm out and then I developed a fluttering noise in my ear, which I later found out from Dr. Graff Radford at Cedars Sinai was simply a muscle spasm of my inner ear muscles. But this doctor was the first one to introduce me to the idea that physical pain can be psychosomatic. So once I got that answer, I calmed down and let it subside. But within a couple days of having that pain subside, my pelvic pain took hold... and this time it took hold for almost a year. It was simply pure agony having this. My whole pelvis was on fire 24/7, and I still had no idea what was going on until I came across this one urologist who said it is simply muscle tension. Even though I was in pain, that diagnosis made me so elated, knowing that this condition was anxiety related, and it eventually subsided by summer time. So in fall of my second year of pharmacy school, the classes really intensified and my whole body just tensed up again. I had pelvic pain, jaw pain, blurred vision, and nausea all at once. Then one day, my brother with paranoid schizophrenia came in my room when I was back home for the weekend and was trying to get in a physical fight with me. I kept telling him to stop as I was trying to study and still in a ton of pain from all my other symptoms, in addition to me hating any kind of altercation to begin with. Anyways, he kept screaming at me, and eventually I just slammed my hand against the desk so hard out of frustration. I thought for sure that my hand was permanently injured after that. So I saw 5 orthopedic surgeons and several physical therapists, adamant that something was wrong. MRI showed nothing, Xrays showed no breaks, and doctors were dumbfounded about the pain. And at this time was when I really started to delve into TMS. I was aware of it before, but never really looked too much into it. This was because after a couple of months of not even being to make a fist of my hand, I knew something was up. Even if there was something physical, I would have shown some type of healing by then. I even started getting carpal tunnel pain as well as ulnar sided pain all of a sudden. But all the nerve conductance tests came back normal, so the neurologist said that it was psychosomatic. So being fortunate to live near Los Angeles, I have access to several TMS therapists and doctors. After seeing Dr. Schechter in LA and talking with Arnold Bloch in Westlake, my hand pain started to get better. Within a matter of a few weeks, my hand is at about 90%, and still currently getting better. AND NOW FINALLY....to the tinnitus. For the last 5 weeks or so, I started to develop tinnitus. But unfortunately, I can't tell if the origin of the tinnitus is TMS or if it was something physically induced. The only reason I'm doubtful about TMS in this regards is because we were watching a movie in class, and as soon as it came on, I had an anxiety attack all of a sudden, mainly because the audio in the movie started irritating my ears. I had just finished up with a big midterm and my autonomic nervous system was simply on edge, and has been for several months. I can't even relax or sleep either, as I have developed insomnia on top of everything else. But I just cant figure out if the movie itself caused the tinnitus due to the horrendous audio, or if it was TMS kicking in. Also, I should add that in the week prior to the onset of this non stop tinnitus, I started getting the ear fluttering again as well as intermittent ear ringing (which I knew was anxiety induced). So is it possible that this tinnitus is from TMS or can bad audio cause this? Both Dr. Schechter and Arnold are convinced it is TMS, but once again, the audio was somewhat loud but made me strain really hard to understand what was being said in the movie. So right now I'm just really mad at myself for not saying anything to begin with in regards to the movie or just simply walking out of the classroom. So any help would be appreciated, and I'm so sorry about the length of this story.
Within a week of starting school, my neck and jaw muscles started to completely spasm out and then I developed a fluttering noise in my ear, which I later found out from Dr. Graff Radford at Cedars Sinai was simply a muscle spasm of my inner ear muscles. But this doctor was the first one to introduce me to the idea that physical pain can be psychosomatic. So once I got that answer, I calmed down and let it subside. But within a couple days of having that pain subside, my pelvic pain took hold... and this time it took hold for almost a year. It was simply pure agony having this. My whole pelvis was on fire 24/7, and I still had no idea what was going on until I came across this one urologist who said it is simply muscle tension. Even though I was in pain, that diagnosis made me so elated, knowing that this condition was anxiety related, and it eventually subsided by summer time. So in fall of my second year of pharmacy school, the classes really intensified and my whole body just tensed up again. I had pelvic pain, jaw pain, blurred vision, and nausea all at once. Then one day, my brother with paranoid schizophrenia came in my room when I was back home for the weekend and was trying to get in a physical fight with me. I kept telling him to stop as I was trying to study and still in a ton of pain from all my other symptoms, in addition to me hating any kind of altercation to begin with. Anyways, he kept screaming at me, and eventually I just slammed my hand against the desk so hard out of frustration. I thought for sure that my hand was permanently injured after that. So I saw 5 orthopedic surgeons and several physical therapists, adamant that something was wrong. MRI showed nothing, Xrays showed no breaks, and doctors were dumbfounded about the pain. And at this time was when I really started to delve into TMS. I was aware of it before, but never really looked too much into it. This was because after a couple of months of not even being to make a fist of my hand, I knew something was up. Even if there was something physical, I would have shown some type of healing by then. I even started getting carpal tunnel pain as well as ulnar sided pain all of a sudden. But all the nerve conductance tests came back normal, so the neurologist said that it was psychosomatic. So being fortunate to live near Los Angeles, I have access to several TMS therapists and doctors. After seeing Dr. Schechter in LA and talking with Arnold Bloch in Westlake, my hand pain started to get better. Within a matter of a few weeks, my hand is at about 90%, and still currently getting better. AND NOW FINALLY....to the tinnitus. For the last 5 weeks or so, I started to develop tinnitus. But unfortunately, I can't tell if the origin of the tinnitus is TMS or if it was something physically induced. The only reason I'm doubtful about TMS in this regards is because we were watching a movie in class, and as soon as it came on, I had an anxiety attack all of a sudden, mainly because the audio in the movie started irritating my ears. I had just finished up with a big midterm and my autonomic nervous system was simply on edge, and has been for several months. I can't even relax or sleep either, as I have developed insomnia on top of everything else. But I just cant figure out if the movie itself caused the tinnitus due to the horrendous audio, or if it was TMS kicking in. Also, I should add that in the week prior to the onset of this non stop tinnitus, I started getting the ear fluttering again as well as intermittent ear ringing (which I knew was anxiety induced). So is it possible that this tinnitus is from TMS or can bad audio cause this? Both Dr. Schechter and Arnold are convinced it is TMS, but once again, the audio was somewhat loud but made me strain really hard to understand what was being said in the movie. So right now I'm just really mad at myself for not saying anything to begin with in regards to the movie or just simply walking out of the classroom. So any help would be appreciated, and I'm so sorry about the length of this story.
