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constant pain sitting & standing

Discussion in 'Support Subforum' started by winterhaven123, May 18, 2015.

  1. winterhaven123

    winterhaven123 Peer Supporter

    I have posted on this forum many times but have never heard of anyone with the same problem. If anyone can please help. I have been through all the testing & Drs refuse anymore. I am fine lying down it's the only relief i get as soon as i stand Or sit the pain is full force every muscle cell & every & anything is is total lock down My entire body is in severe pain 5 years of Hell with no end in sight please help has anyone had this happen with them why would the body stay in a constant pain state other than lying down i can not function
     
  2. Andy Bayliss

    Andy Bayliss TMS Coach & Beloved Grand Eagle

    Hi Winterhaven,

    I have not had your experience, nor have I heard of it, in my limited experience.

    Question: Why does it matter if someone else has this type pain? Aren't you certain it is TMS? I looked all around for foot pain stories related to TMS, and only found a few. That did slow me down at first, so I understand. The reason I ask the question is that if you have had all these physicians find no reason for the pain (pardon me if I misunderstand), then why not embrace the Dr. Sarno approach without hesitation? (Not sure how much you have tried it!)

    Andy B.
     
  3. winterhaven123

    winterhaven123 Peer Supporter

    Thank you for your reply Yes i found Dr sarno approx 2 1/2 years ago. I have read The divided Mind/ also listened 50 times to healing back pain. I know He states how disabling this pain can be & be anywhere in your body. & I believe so & I do believe it's Tms I have tried every approach. When clinical Depression grabs hold of you it's a vicious cycle that i feel is impossible to break High anxiety/Clinical Depression drop on the floor pain. Yes I do take medication that sometimes brings little relief. I have read several books & tried everything Started from upper abdominal /chestwall pain Spread to my midback ribcage now its everywhere in My body. My entire nervous system is on fire. Yes I had been under years of severe distress i finally broke free from but the pain persist i have become isolated from the world.
     
  4. Mala

    Mala Well known member

    Hi winterhaven. So sorry to hear that u r going thru so much pain. It can't be easy & u r right it is a vicious cycle of pain, depression, more pain & your nervous system is just on high alert all the time which doesn't help.

    Ok so u say u have been to the drs. And what have they said? Can they say what it is or isn't or might be?

    You said that u have read sarno & listened to healing back pain & believe it is TMS. Can u say why you think it is TMS? What aspects of the pain make u think that it is TMS? Can u link the pain to anything emotional? Was there a trigger?

    Sorry for asking so many questions but it would help us to help u if u gave a bit more insight that is if u want to of course.

    I can understand why it would give u some solace & support to know that someone else is going thru or has been thru the same thing but Andy is right. If u can't find anyone with the exact same symptoms u can still do the work as TMS manifests itself in different ways in different ppl. Like for example you could try the SEP which is available for free on the TMS wiki & maybe even submit a question to one of our TMS experts. See what that brings up.

    I also suggest u continue with any medication that can give u some relief & make u less anxious.

    Regards

    Mala
     
  5. Walt Oleksy

    Walt Oleksy Beloved Grand Eagle

    Hi, Winterhaven. Andy and Mala have given you the best advice. Doctors have not found anything structurally wrong
    with you, so it has to be TMS from repressed emotions and/or a perfectionist and goodist personality. Lots of us have both.

    Journaling helped me to discover that I had been repressing feelings of abandonment and insecurity since I was seven years old
    when my parents divorced. You can discover your psychological reasons for having pain.

    You may feel pain when sitting or standing because now it has developed into a conditioned reflex expect pain in those activities.
    You have to retrain your mind that you feel fine when you sit or stand. It may take some time, but you can do it.
     
  6. Andy Bayliss

    Andy Bayliss TMS Coach & Beloved Grand Eagle

    Winterhaven123,

    I am supposing you need a TMS type counselor. Have you tried that? Alan's folks in LA can work long distance with you, and I am sure there are many others. I work long distance too, but am not a pychotherapist. I hope you keep working at it, and get the support you may need.

    Andy B.
     
  7. winterhaven123

    winterhaven123 Peer Supporter

    Hi walt thanks always for responding. Maybe i can get part of this out there is so much more going on. I have been storing & repression for many year i am 51 years old & seen it all Trauma with the big T. maybe writing this will give someone insight & possible be able to help Me. So here goes some of the memories I try to let go of. As a child i lived in shame because of my mother embassaring Me always. i started school at the age of 4 & as other mothers always hugged & kissed their children when i knew she was coming i would run & hide in the closet i was very shamed of her because she always put Me down & yelled at Me in front of all my classmates. I was quiet shy & barley spoke. My Sisters & brother always did very well in school but i was the slow leaner dumb one. because of all the shame i did fail 1 year of school. I was the middle child & my brother & We were always made to stay outside all day from sun up to sundown. We were kept totally isolated from playing or interacting with any activities. Childhood was not the worst or the best either when I was 11 & my younger sister was 10 My own brother Sexually Molested both of us nothing was ever said about it. As we got older My sister did start talking about it telling him what he did & i was too ashamed to ever mention it. All of Us left home young My brother & older sister graduated school at 17 & both joined the Airforce. Myself left home at 15 approx 3 weeks before my 16th birthday & Moved in with a guy 6 years older than Me his nephew also lived there. He was selling Pot & i knew about part of it but not the large amounts He was involved in. I also knew nothing about his involvement with large amounts of cocaine. this is someone i knew since i was 5 i was with him for about 2 years & His nephews body was found in a ditch shot & dead. about 6 moths later I went on a trip to Fl from Ny to visit My sister that was stationed at Eglin Air force base i was 17 My mom called & told Me He was shot 5 times & killed. I meant someone when i was 19 & got married the Hell shit marriage lasted 20 years 2 kids & The abuse & fear started the first thing that happened He kicked Me & broke My tailbone I could not sit for over 1 year & had to work Than the beatings with belts & whips left bruises all over My body the chocking & locking me in rooms The unwanted sex the abuse I closed my eyes to as He beat my kids with 2 by4s they were full of bruises & i was in fear of My life the quilt i feel for allowing all this to happen I had to work 10- 15 hrs a day to support them. He was lazy & would not work I worked a high volume job in Vegas & had to speak to alot of people He would daily stand there with his arms crossed & watch every move i made. i was scared to death & allowed the abuse to Me & my kids continue. My emotions were feared so much than My hands & feet would swell up so bad everyday I could no longer walk. after 11 years on that job i had to quit. i allowed Myself & my kids to be abused for many years. i finally broke free of him with him trying to kill Me. When my Son turned 16 he got him addicted to meth it about killed Me I couldent fight anymore there was nothing left. I have never been arrested or done drugs in my entire life.( I have smoked pot when i was younger) both my son's had severe behavioral issues because of what i allowed him to do. The cops dogs helicopters were constantly at My house they were all always in trouble. one is in prison now & the other just got out. They take turns & i repress & close my eyes. as i said i finally escaped from the frying pan to the fire. meant a guy i ending on being with who emotionally abused Me for 14 years. He is very destructive & smashes & breaks anything He comes in contact with he is full of angry & took it out on Me & like a sponge learned pattern i took & ate all the shit again. i was with him on & off i purchased property right net door to him & again the same pattern a living hell of more emotional abuse. the pain started 4 1/2 years prior to escaping him i had to move & am now renting a house. which my other place was paid for & is now up for sale. i cant even go there to get my belongings out. It's a major trigger & sets Me in bed or on the floor for days at a time even without going there i am in constant pain. Like you said walt it could be a conditioned response. there is so much more to the Big T i can write a book if i could spell. i diden't Mention prior My sister like myself is the nicest most caring givin person in the world who lives in a giant house in vegas & allowed my brother to ship his Son there because He could not handle him & He got on Heioin & stabbed with a icepick 25 times & killed My sisters dear friend that lived in Her guest house. His motive was her car. My brother is hateful & is in total denial & wont even talk about it to anyone. prior to that He was in prison for 7 years for locking his co workers in a freezer at knife point & robbing Burger King My sister like My self always trys to see change for the better in people & look what happens. The list goes on. I trust no one I am full of anger/ hurt rejection depression aniexty & severe non stopple pain. Yes i see a psychotherpist for over a year now. & yes i have been through the SeP program 2 times & have read sarno's work The Great pain deception . Dr Clarke they cant find anything wrong & Scott Brady Pain free for life Any & all help would be appreciated I am losing faith Help!!!!!!!!!!!!
     
  8. winterhaven123

    winterhaven123 Peer Supporter

     
  9. Andy Bayliss

    Andy Bayliss TMS Coach & Beloved Grand Eagle

    Hi Winterhaven,

    Does your psychotherapist know the TMS work? I wonder if you could work with Alan's people long distance, as well as your local psychotherapist. I think you need someone who knows TMS as a psychotherapist.

    I am very sorry for your rough experiences and the pain you are in. You are basically in a crisis. This requires a team approach that you should request through your psychotherapist. My heart goes out to you. You have lots of emotional reasons/history why you would be in pain. So is the personality which "rolls over and takes it" tendency. How enraging to the inner child!! You seem to see the patterns and reasons for the TMS. Alan's people might be good help.

    http://www.tmswiki.org/ppd/Alan_Gordon,_LCSW

    I am sorry I can't give you any better suggestions right now.

    Andy B.
     
  10. winterhaven123

    winterhaven123 Peer Supporter

    Hi Andy thanks for your reply. i just thought maybe i could let go of some of things i have held onto for so long the story is much more intense. but it would only add fuel to the fire. anyway i have been doing alot of meditation & just go day to day minute to minute. I do realize i am full of anger & distrust. i pretty much stay isolated flat on my back. a 15 minute to the store is too stressful. appreciate your response thanks
     
  11. Andy Bayliss

    Andy Bayliss TMS Coach & Beloved Grand Eagle

    You are welcome Winterhaven. You have a lot of strength and will.
    Andy B.
     
  12. Boston Redsox

    Boston Redsox Well Known Member


    Like to chime in on the therapist question i worked with a tms therapist and a non tms therpist and there methods are the same. I found the regular therpist to be more flexiable meaning they come at it with more angles then just the fear. Again this is my experiance and they are covered by insurance where tms therapy is not
     
  13. winterhaven123

    winterhaven123 Peer Supporter

    Hi Andy I appreciate you concern & post. Yes life has been quit a RollerCoaster Ride. it makes you distrust everyone. there is no end as much i i keep stay to myself isolated again tonight more stress it;s stuck in my body & mind & is afraid to let go i tried so many positive changes. but the list goes on way stress overload i repressed for years. i truly do need help & thanks again for your reply
     
  14. Andy Bayliss

    Andy Bayliss TMS Coach & Beloved Grand Eagle

    You are welcome, winterhaven123.
     
  15. Boston Redsox

    Boston Redsox Well Known Member

    Winter

    You can't conquer all your stressful issues in one sitting take the most important one and deal with that and work down your list
     
  16. winterhaven123

    winterhaven123 Peer Supporter

    Yes thank you. You are correct & I am trying hard i do recognize & accept My issues The hardest & biggest obstacle that stops Me in My tracks everyday is the severity of My clinical depression it holds me back from moving forward. thanks Judy
     
  17. Walt Oleksy

    Walt Oleksy Beloved Grand Eagle

    Hi again, Winterhaven. I wish I were there to give you a big hug.
    Maybe consider yourself hugged. We who have read your post feel sorry you have had such a rough time.

    My father used to put me down in front of his beer-drinking pals. I never knew why. I was a good boy
    and never got into trouble. I never mentioned this before, but he also used to reach out as if he was going
    to grab me between my legs, when I was a preteen and teenager. I never liked that. I don't think my dad
    was gay or bisexual, but why would a father do that to his son?

    I didn't let his putting me down stop me from going to college and becoming a happy writer of books,
    even though I haven't made much money out of it. I did what I loved doing, and that has made me happy.

    Try to think positive, that the future is going to be better than the past. You certainly don't have to do
    anymore journaling. You know the psychological causes of your pain. Now just live in the present and
    forget the past.

    In any case, you have found some new friends here and we care about you.
     
  18. winterhaven123

    winterhaven123 Peer Supporter

    Thanks Walt You are also right I am trying my best to move forward & let the past go. with you it it was your Father with myself it was My mother My father was a Saint. But he stuck it out with My Mother for 42 years She passed away in 2001 at the age of 57. She always had constant Headaches I am sure was also TMS prior to all the pain For over 10 years My body was in a constant state of welp & severe swelling of My hands & feet & my body full of hives. I was told by 1 Dr only it was emotional Stress through that i was still able to work Now this is totally disabling. 4 1/2 years started in My abdominal & spread throughout My entire Ribcage & body I do accept & have the awareness of the connection The depression was prior to the pain & is the hardest thing to fight thanks again Walt I am onto it & givin it My best
     
  19. winterhaven123

    winterhaven123 Peer Supporter

     

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