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Discussion in 'General Discussion Subforum' started by ellie freegan, Sep 17, 2015.

  1. ellie freegan

    ellie freegan Peer Supporter

    Is it worth Buying lots of different tms books So far I have Read Healing back pain unlearn your pain And Working on the programAnd Done wiki Structured educational program But Not noticed much improvement. Would be grateful for anyone opinion on Whether to buy more books Thank you.
  2. mike2014

    mike2014 Beloved Grand Eagle

    Hi Ellie, the problem that I've faced is the danger of being exposed to so many books on TMS. Whilst I appreciate it's all about knowledge therapy there's a risk of moving from book to book without digesting the information or following the process, which can lead to frustration.

    The ones you've mentioned and Steve O's book is all that you really need.

    As you progress on your journey, you can look into supplementing the TMS framework with the likes of EFT, ITSDP ETC. But for now try not to get consumed in the when will I be healed, as the fear you are instilling within is negating your hard work. Just know that the work you are doing will bring about change but it will be slow, our s conscious mind is stubborn creature that will only listen when we eliminate fear and challenge it.

    Good luck and please remember to be kind, gentle and loving to yourself.
    Simplicity and JanAtheCPA like this.
  3. JanAtheCPA

    JanAtheCPA Beloved Grand Eagle

    Hi Ellie,
    I can hear your frustration, and I'm really sorry you feel like you're not getting anywhere.

    I was curious about your process, so I scanned some of your other posts, and what I see is that a LOT of your energy is spent worrying. You use that word constantly! You Worry about how well you are doing this work, you Worry about whether it will work, you Worry about whether or not you believe in TMS, you Worry about whether you should take your antidepressants, and and I didn't even look at the posts that seemed to be about specific symptoms but I'll bet that the "W" word shows up in them too!

    In addition to the fact that you probably are a long way from 100% belief in the TMS diagnosis, the unhelpful thing you are doing to yourself is allowing all of these shallow Worries to occupy your surface thoughts, creating a constant negative chatter in your head. How can your conscious mind break through all that? It needs some peace and quiet so it can figure out what is really going on deep deep down inside where the repressed emotions are.

    And I see that you are pretty sure that that you don't have a lot of negative emotions, and that you can't find things to write about, etc. Based totally on my own personal experience, I am going to suggest that when you did the writing exercises in the SEP, that your brain was holding you back, by telling you all of the things that you should not write down. It probably convinced you that certain things weren't important. Or that other things were too embarrassing and not really important anyway. I'm here to tell you that those are the very things that you need to write down, and that you need to examine. They might not be earth-shattering, but they are important to find out how you processed things as a child.

    The reason I'm telling you all this is because I recognized myself when you said those things. Four years ago, I also felt that I did not have a negative or traumatic childhood - and in fact I did not - that's still true. But what you need to understand (as Freud certainly did) is that Every Human Being is traumatized by the experience of being born human, and being raised by other humans, as imperfect as we all are. Our childhoods are full of anger, shame, guilt, and embarrassment. Little children feel guilty all the time. And they/we are angry a LOT. We're angry at being forced to give up breastfeeding, at having to share our parents' attention with the rest of the world, at having siblings, at having to leave the safety of home, and at having to grow up.

    And shame and embarrassment in childhood? OMG - it's constant!

    And then there's the rage, which is mostly rage at our parents for not protecting us from all of the other things, and for not cherishing us 100% of the time. And here is what our primitive brains do with all of that rage, anger, shame, guilt, and embarrassment - they repress it. They repress it because our brains think it is dangerous for our survival in a primitive world to be going around with those negative emotions at the front of our conscious brains.

    The problem is that in the modern world, we live too long, and our day-to-day life is NOT consumed with raw survival, which in itself is a perfect distraction. Plus there's more and more repression as we respond to adult/modern stresses with some of those same childhood emotions. The repression builds and builds and the brain needs another method of distraction. And the result is pain. Pain, in all its many varieties. And depression, anxiety, and OCD, plus IBS, allergies, and many other symptoms.

    So now I'm curious to know if mindfulness and self-love have a significant and conscious place in your program? I'm thinking that you may need a big dose of both of these. Mindfulness, because you need to learn to turn off that shallow negative self-talk so you can access your subconscious thoughts and unconscious emotions. And self-love, because you need to know - really know - that your true self is worth the effort.

    We have lots of suggestions for resources for these two things in particular. Including an upcoming free online Mindfulness Summit which starts on Oct 1!

    To answer your immediate question, Ellie - I would say no more TMS books, and perhaps take a break from Dr. Schubiner's program (if the SEP already did nothing) and instead take a look at calming down, learning about mindfulness, and practicing self-love.

    Wishing you all the best!

  4. mike2014

    mike2014 Beloved Grand Eagle

    Excellent advise Jan. Mindfulness will definitely help her to harness awareness and observe without passing judgement.

    I think the anxiety, worry, depression etc will tail off as a result of being more mindful, after all these are just preconceived thoughts that may not even be her own.
    Last edited: Sep 17, 2015
    JanAtheCPA likes this.
  5. JanAtheCPA

    JanAtheCPA Beloved Grand Eagle

    And this was a really excellent point, Mike.
    mike2014 likes this.
  6. Porpoise

    Porpoise Peer Supporter

    Just want to comment that I find your posts inspirational, Jan. Your comments always hit me deeply where it counts. Thank you.

    JanAtheCPA likes this.
  7. JanAtheCPA

    JanAtheCPA Beloved Grand Eagle

    Thank you, Porpoise, that means a lot!:happy:
  8. Walt Oleksy (RIP 2021)

    Walt Oleksy (RIP 2021) Beloved Grand Eagle

    Hi, Ellie. I read a few very good books on TMS but it all seemed to boil down to believing 100 percent that TMS causes our pain.
    I find Dr. Sarno's 12 Daily reminders to be very important to read every day. Herbie, another TMS recoverer, wrote his longer version of them
    which I think can be very helpful in healing.

    Herbie’s Extended Version of Dr. Sarno’s 12 DAILY REMINDERS

    1. The pain is due to TMS. This is real pain or anxiety but its caused by subconscious tensions and triggers, stressors and traits to your reactions and fears and also when at boiling point your conscious tension can and does cause real pain too.
    2. The main reason for the pain is mild oxygen deprivation. This means that when you get in pain or in anxiety then the the blood is restricted from going to your lower back for instance. The blood being restricted causes oxygen deprivation which causes the pain - remember, where theirs no oxygen then there is pain in the body. Also, The pain stays because of fear and focus to physical organic symptoms and repressions.
    3. TMS is a harmless condition caused by my REPRESSED EMOTIONS so even though you think you can harm yourself from the years of pain you have felt and how you feel in general -- so far no reports have been heard from tms healing knowledge causing damage to anyone, it only helps.
    4. The principle emotion is your repressed ANGER -- this means under your consciousness lies something that happens automatically to everyone. Tmsers have repressions that are stored because of our personality traits,traumas, stressors, fears, strain, etc... When these stored repressions build and build then eventually they cause the brain to send pain into your body to keep you from having an emotional crises. The mind-body thinks its helping you.
    5. TMS exists to DISTRACT your attentions from the emotions, stressors, tensions and strains of your personality traits because if you can get distraction then you wont have to be in emotional turmoil. When you don't face and feel your emotions and they get repressed cause you didn't want to deal with something -- they are just adding up in this beaker, ready to pour over and create real pain and anxiety in your body.
    6. Since my body is perfectly normal, there is nothing to fear. So in reality when I fear the pain or anxiety I just cause myself undo strain and tension adding to the beaker of pain. If I fear then I feed the pain, If I fear Its impossible to recondition. Fear keeps the pain and anxiety alive in the body through focus.
    7. Therefore, physical activity is harmless.If I want to work against the pain I could but its better to lose some of the pain so when I start my life over I=t have to be in pain trying to heal cause facing the repressions and all the other activities that cause the pain and reversing my fear and focus to them then I can heal.
    8. I am resuming all normal physical activity. I don't fear moving anymore. I believe in my bodies ability to heal now. I can move how I want. I will not fear moving with a bent back anymore. I will also practice going out and acting normal again, not in fear of what pain might do to me.
    9. The pain is unimportant and powerless. Its only power is how its hidden -- its illusion, Its fear.
    10. I will keep my attention on the emotional issues. I will think about my emotions and feel my emotions throughout the day. I will not judge, criticize or fear my emotions. I will not run from my emotional issues but face everyone of them. I will feel my emotions fully and cry if I need to. Then I will release the emotion and get my mind and thoughts back to my life and living in the present, in flow.
    11. I am in control of all of this. This is how I recover.
    12. I will be thinking PSYCHOLOGICALLY AT ALL TIMES. This means I will keep my thoughts on psychological issues like happiness, fear and anger -- traits and triggers, conditioning and journaling. The science behind mind-body/tms healing, etc.... This way I will not feed my thoughts to the body -- that is a trick of tms. Tms will always try to get me to focus on the body caused by the pain until I break its show and flair. When I get my attention off psychical symptoms and on emotional issues and psychological issues then I will not feed the fear of the physical issues anymore thus making the tms of no effect. This will in return, give us the cure.
  9. Simplicity

    Simplicity Guest

    I totally agree; such a great point. I have a few books that I want to read but I'm taking my time, it can be overwhelming otherwise.
    Eric "Herbie" Watson likes this.
  10. ellie freegan

    ellie freegan Peer Supporter

    hi Jan for some reason I managed to miss this post until now but it's very useful thank you very much. I just wondered if you have any specific tips about practising self love or you can direct me to something good to read on that when I search the wiki there are so many results I didn't know where to start. I have been trying mindfulness on and off this year but don't seem to be getting anywhere really with it. Even though I tried it every day for at least a few months and I'm trying to start doing it every day again now. Also I guess I'm struggling to imagine how it's going to help me access my deeply repressed emotions. Also would you recommend me going back to journalling at some point writing down everything that I think doesn't matter?
    Thanks a lot Ellie
  11. JanAtheCPA

    JanAtheCPA Beloved Grand Eagle

    Hi Ellie,

    You know, at some point I had to learn to soften up, open up, and really love myself. One thing I was able to do as a result was get in touch with myself as a little girl. Doing that was another turning point in this journey, I think because being able to do that was a radical departure from my normal cynical and pragmatic persona.

    Someone recommended the movie "You Can Heal Your Life" by Louise Hay, and that might be a good one for you, too. I checked it out from my local library. It's also in audio and book formats. She has many different books, but I think this was the original.

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