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Day 11 Another past event

Marla

Marla

Peer Supporter
I picked a event that dealt with shame and I found myself almost unable to stay focused on it while journaling.

I wanted to think in the present, not remember how bad I felt. It was easier to deal with the fearful problems I remembered then shameful regrets and mistakes.

The program will be a bit slower this month because I am working full time while boss on month honeymoon.

I had a touch of pain at work yesterday and it was caused by boredom and I am fighting another bout of IBS again and dealing with feeling queasy which last for days.

I didn't think of IBS being TMS until today but as I look back when it started I was stressed out at the time.
 
Dear Marla,
I have similar things going on for me. On days when I journal about certain people, I feel so nauseous I cannot function, cancel plans etc. But then by the next day or so it passes. I think it's important to keep with the SEP, NO MATTER HOW PAINFUL. The next day comes and the moon did not fall from the sky and despite facing our most painful memories we are still here. And, the nausea passes. I am happy to say I have been feeling ok in my stomach since Sunday. Now a tightness in my neck. It just moved. The pain moved not because something is wrong physically. As dr. Sarno says, think emotionally. No emotion is permanent. It's just a thought. For me, it's about knowing there is nothing physically wrong and believing that this thought, this emotion can be released and let go. The journaling is difficult, and sometimes we feel it'sore comfortable to stay where we are, but that is not so. We can feel better. I am on day 13 of the SEP and I see results. Just keep at it. Letting go of the emotions through journaling is freeing. In the moment it doesn't feel like that. Just trust that it helps. This is a great place for support. We are all here for you.
Angel
 
Marla,
Dr. Evan's taught me that almost anything can be "TMS". I prefer Dr. David Clarke's ("They Can't Find Anything Wrong") term "Stress Illness" as TMS really defines the back pain syndrome Dr. Sarno spoke of. Stress Illness covers the whole gamut.

IMO, Angelic gave some really good advice. Sticking with your process (the SEP in your case and hers). Without feeling the emotions and letting them get "used up" or as Agelic says "released" they stay inside and create symptoms. The symptoms are messages like "let me outta here!".

I don't completely agree with Angelic on emotions. I think emotions are more than just thoughts. I was told by a counselor once that she felt I emoted via my physical sensations. I see them as more tangible than a thought. I believe they need to be treated as such. Accepted, observed with curiosity and without judgement.... And be FELT. You have probably already found we all don't agree on this site. Tha is not a bad thing. There are lots of folks here that have been successful and in many different ways. Take what works for you, from each of us, and create your own hybrid TMS/Stress Illness reduction program.

Speaking to your IBS (and not realizing it was a manifestation of your response to your stress "until today"), I had gout in May. I treated it physically and didn't think too much about it from a stress perspective, although I was not responding to my stresses as well as I could have. I see it now though. Hind sight is 20/20. Dial forward, and I have had 2 gout attacks in 8 days. Now I KNOW I am not making good choices. So, Wednesday night I made a good choice. I chose to go back to counseling after about a year break from it.

"Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response. In our response lies our growth and our freedom." Viktor E. Frankl
 
I have been thinking about this and what Matthew wrote is better. The emotions and/or pain and sickness are real. No doubt about that. The thought (stimulus) comes first. And between stimulus (thought) and response (pain, emotion, illness) lies the space to choose. I remember this now from when I was in counseling. So, thoughts are just thoughts. It's how we respond to them that creates the outcome.
 
That is an interesting way of explaining it Angelic. I never thought of it quite that way before.
 
Well, I suppose counseling is helpful. Sometimes we forget what we learned, or, we were not in the place to use it yet.
 
Counseling saved me from years of intermittent disabling back pain and a plethora of other symptoms. But, I think you read my "success" story, so that is not new to you. I am all for it. I took a much needed break from it, now I am diving in again. This counselor is very spiritually minded. She uses regressive hypnosis. It should be a wonderful experience.
 
Regressive hypnosis sounds like scary stuff. Make sure you are ready for what you may hear. Souls regroup. Do you really want to know who was you mother, sister, brother, child? How will that change your current relationships?
 
That was me Walt, I will report back on how this counselor works, and what I get out of it. There is no doubt to me the gout is stress triggered. It is happening more frequently and it is a new symptom for me since May, so time to get ahead of it, before it gets ahead of me. Those days are behind me.
 
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