Angry at the money spent

[Patrisia]

Is anyone here angry at the amount of money the TMS had cost them? I spent so much money (my family) over the years on chiropractors (back pain) and now root canals (it was trigeminal neuralgia so that was unnecessary) and neurologists (whose meds didn't work). I live in the US and health care is expensive. Not even mentioning that I am in debt because of a visit to the ER (where, guess what, they couldn't help me but charged me a lot of money for that visit). How to get over the anger at the money TMS has cost me to date? It's an insane amount. I am angry that body produces such confusing symptoms that doctors themselves could not help but charged me so much for these visits! Not even mentioning all the alternative doctors..

 

[mbo]

felt angry is not the issue. The pain persists because you have a huge quantity of UNFELT RAGE.
Your «inner Chucky» is ready to kill all those hustlers (oficial or alternative, well-meant or just thiefs). But your brain detects the radical intentions of your «inner Chucky» ...and also knows the requeriments of your superego for being a «very good person».....and creates pain: the perfect distraction for that unbearable conflict. And so the vicious circle is perpetuated.
Some kind of catch-22 ?

Take care !

 

[Baseball65]

Yes and Yes and Yes.

I am having to pay a lot of money NOW for TMS symptoms I had w/my teeth a 15 years ago. The pain was so 'uncatchable' that they ended up extracting a molar...one that was probably totally healthy . I knew about TMS at that point but didn't imagine it would go after my FACE? Now I gotta shell out cash for implants and crap, just so I can eat. Yes It is on my rage list.

But... I have also found a way to pass this info on to younger people SO it wasn't for nothing. The rage is still there but at least I got an experience in trade. REmemBER... we never would have listened to Sarno or taken TMS serious unless we had tried all of those other things. That will NOT assuage the child within who needs to rage But it will make sense to the 'parent' and the 'adult'

 

[EricFeelsThisWay]

I spent thousands of dollars on chiropractor, acupuncture, physical therapy, Dr’s visits, massages, personal training, psychotherapy, hypnotherapy.....so yea I def have resentment. However what I will say is that knowing my issues are emotional in nature has kept me away from traditional medicine practitioners when I know their service will be of no use to me. Journaling, drinking some tea, calling a friend, taking a walk, gojng to see a movie, taking a bubble bath...these are the cures, and they are all free. Now I witness other people go through the cycle shelling out copay after copay and I am sorry for them but they will see.

 

[miffybunny]

You can't regret the past because you were doing the best with what you knew then. Everything we go through has a deeper lesson. If I stewed about the untold amount of money and time spent on unpleasant and useless medical procedures, not to mention divorce lawyers lol...I would jump off a cliff. All you have is the present moment so It's better to be grateful that you are not in that place anymore. There are people who never learn, who never wake up and who stay stuck their entire lives...waiting for something or someone outside of themselves to fix them. That is a waste of life in my opinion. Everything you went through was to bring you to where you are now.

 

[Jude]

I haven't actually seen many doctors because I didn't have insurance for many years, so it really wasn't an option. I am grateful for the few I did see who confirmed I didn't have a physical problem when I was afraid I did. But here's who I feel real ANGER at: TMS coaches who take your money and then offer pat, one-size-fits-all solutions. Yep! I think it's irresponsible and outrageous. And I am angry with myself for falling for it. Once. Of course, a certain percentage will be helped because they happen to need some basic information about TMS in that moment and they didn't manage to find the free resources. And some will get nothing much either way. But then there's the group that worries me most--the ones who as a result of receiving superficial or misleading advice are put off and walk away from understanding how TMS is working in their own lives.

 

[miffybunny]

I haven't actually seen many doctors because I didn't have insurance for many years, so it really wasn't an option. I am grateful for the few I did see who confirmed I didn't have a physical problem when I was afraid I did. But here's who I feel real ANGER at: TMS coaches who take your money and then offer pat, one-size-fits-all solutions. Yep! I think it's irresponsible and outrageous. And I am angry with myself for falling for it. Once. Of course, a certain percentage will be helped because they happen to need some basic information about TMS in that moment and they didn't manage to find the free resources. And some will get nothing much either way. But then there's the group that worries me most--the ones who as a result of receiving superficial or misleading advice are put off and walk away from understanding how TMS is working in their own lives.

Sometimes, deeper psychotherapy is required that a TMS coach may not be qualified to give. Sometimes speaking to a TMS coach may be all a person needs to get over that hump. Everyone is different. Not everyone clicks with every psychotherapist either. I'm not sure who you spoke with or what your expectations were but I was fortunate enough to speak to Steve O and Dr. Schubiner briefly (a 2 minute phone call with Dr. Schubiner literally made all the difference at one point) and I had therapy with the pain psychology center on the phone. I'm not sure it's fair to expect a TMS coach to do intensive pychoanalysis or ISTDP therapy and I don't think that's what they advertise either. There is no comparison between the medical industry and a TMS coach (even a bad one). There is no comparison in how much money I spent on doctors as opposed to therapy. Each of my Ketamine infusions was 3K out of pocket (I had 5). I tried Calmare therapy which was in the thousands and not covered by insurance as well. What I spent on TMS therapy was worth every penny to get my life back and a drop in the bucket compared to the medical mill.

 

[Jude]

Sometimes, deeper psychotherapy is required that a TMS coach may not be qualified to give. Sometimes speaking to a TMS coach may be all person needs to get over that hump. Everyone is different....

To be clear, I was not speaking about psychotherapy. More to your other point, that everyone is different.
And (as I said) I agree with you that a coach can "hit the spot" with many people. And be clueless about how to help others who don't fit the cookie-cutter prescription. Since everyone is different, a coach who says (in essence, I'm summarizing here) "follow my 3-point program, and if it doesn't work for you, then the problem lies in what you are doing/not doing," will not hit the spot with everyone. Because those points are not what everyone needs. It would also help if the coach has the ability to say something along the lines of "this 3-point program worked for me, but maybe it won't work for you..." But then they could charge $100, could they. Because they only operate out of a predetermined formula.

 

[Celayne]

I have talked with a couple of well known TMS experts. In retrospect, I didn’t get any more out of those rather costly phone calls than I have gotten from peer support on this wiki or from other free resources. I was irritated with myself at one point for falling into the trap of thinking one chat with someone would solve all my problems. Especially the second call — I should have known better, but I don’t beat myself up over it because I was still looking for someone else to save me. I was pretty desperate at one time.

I imagine they offer the same advice to everybody because like conventional and alternative health care folks, they know what they have been taught or learned and that’s the knowledge you are buying from them.

Those two sessions cost me far less than the futile doctor appointments and testing, chiropractic care and all the other stuff I tried that didn’t help.

 

[Baseball65]

I was still looking for someone else to save me

Ultimately, all of us are conditioned to think and expect this.... Our collective cultural mindset implies it.

That's actually part of the thinking that got us into TMS-land. We had a SCARY symptom. Then we went to a 'specialist' or a doctor who told us something that vaguely answered our fearful inquiry. (not ameliorated...just explained) He gave us a solution. It didn't work. We went to another person. Didn't work. and another and another and so on and so on....

We always want to go OUTSIDE for answers in the world, but the truth is that the answers are always INSIDE. We don't like that because for many of us with really scary shit in our pasts it is easier to keep trying specialists OR TMS coaches. Every time I work with another TMSer who is 'stuck' or not getting it, I am aware that they have something REALLY painful that they either can't or won't look at. I don't blame them. I get really grateful that whatever BB65's 'deal' was, it isn't beyond the scope of reading , writing, screaming and breaking a few sheets of drywall.

I used to be VERY suspect of anything that cost money (chiro, kinesiology, acupuncture...etc). I had mixed feelings when I saw that TMS coach was a for-profit job... remember Sarno ditching his therapists?

Sarno was really clear that a learning program ought to banish it for 95% of us and some old school anger mining therapy would help the other 5%.

But some of us are 'special' and need to have to keep going OUT there... When I read 'Healing Back Pain' and saw the 95/5 split I was never in my life so FREAKING happy to find out I was average. In the Boring majority. NOT special. Thank You God.

That being said, I have benefited from reading the writings of some of the TMS professionals on this forum... So, I guess that is truly what 'mixed feelings' are....

Before anyone lays out cash... Read the damn books?

Love ya

 

[PainNoMore]

definitely been there. i had needless surgery that costs thousands of dollars. but, i'm past that now. and so very grateful that i've found the actual cause of the many different pains that i've had...and still get...i must be the king of the symptom imperative.
the thing that troubles me is when i think of all the people that are on pain meds (especially powerful addictive opioids)....and how hopeless so many of them must be.

 

[plum]

...the thing that troubles me is when i think of all the people that are on pain meds (especially powerful addictive opioids)....and how hopeless so many of them must be.

This gets to me too. It’s heartbreaking.

 

[TG957]

I guess I was so lucky to have only spent in the neighborhood of $8000 on my last bout of TMS before I knew it was TMS. Meditation was only $320 for two classes - and then it is all free of charge!

 

[daniebama]

i consider all the money i´ve spent has been been the way of learning how to get here..so it doesn´t hurt me any more

 

[deafheaven]

Think of all the money you'll be saving from now on

 

[TG957]

I would say my anger over money does not come close to my anger over the bad advice that was given to me and is still being given to hundreds of thousands of people around the world. And some of them do take that advice and endure useless and damaging surgeries, medications, and eventually become slaves to the medical procedures, while still in pain.

 

[daniebama]

I agree,this week my pain has been reduced a lot,now i am writting this i just come back after spending three hours mountain walking with no pain...and now i am thinking about a doctor here in barcelona (i payed 300 euros just for the first meet) ...i went with my sister,she saw me very worried about my just discovered spondilolistesis and she wanted to come with me...So,this doctor saw my MRI for ten seconds and told me "you have a irreversible and incurable illness for all your life" (dramatic)..but the point was when suddenly he looked at my sister who was in completely silence sit next to me and he says to my sister "and because you are his sister,i am sure you have espondilolistesis too and you don´t know yet"....WTF ...how can you be so bad person to scare a person with no reason ...now i think about that day,and for the first time,i laugh...i have tried to leave some reviews on his website explainig this and informing about dr. Sarno..but the make them dissapear..

 

[Baseball65]

saw my MRI for ten seconds

DUDE ! . I LOVE your profile penguin or whoever he is!

Yep... I might go to ten specialists and get a total of 5 minutes worth of time and they say and do and make life threatening/destroying statements with no context. Funny, at some points I was almost relieved because at least it was an explanation. I was so scared, ANY story seemed better than No story.

Once again,I am glad I was told about my congenital fusion..."You should have been in pain your whole life!" because I wasn't, so it was a clue and helped with the unraveling of the lie when I learned about TMS.

and, as Sarno points out, most of us had to get pretty beat up and scared before we'd be open minded to the truth.

“I have not failed. I’ve just found 10,000 ways that won’t work.”
-Thomas Edison

That's where we all needed to get, so it wasn't wasted money ;just our field research into the 10,000 ways that don't work!!

 

[daniebama]

DUDE ! . I LOVE your profile penguin or whoever he is!

hahaha yeah Beloved Grand Eagle it´s me (the guy not the penguin), i had to put this picture because my style with the guitar is pretty ridiculous
I understand Patrisia when talks about being angry about the money...but it´s not because of the money itself..it´s being angry about all this shit of medicine world that let people,forces people, to spend a big amount of money with no sense and no cure...knowing (because i am sure they know) Dr. Sarno´s therapy it´s cheaper and effective.So,in my case,anger was not only about the money itself,it was because the business around this world who lives in Middle Age doing surgerys with no sense and prefers money and leave people suffering instead of heal them..But the happines to get here and start this therapy,feeling changes every day..makes me forget and forgive them..they are not doctors,they think they are.

 

[Baseball65]

the guy not the penguin

That was awesome.

I did meet a couple of really honest Drs. In my pain odyssey. A Really young Surgeon who was later FIRED for not doing enough surgeries, and a brilliant brain surgeon who treated kids with epilepsy. Both of them said "Yeah... I see all of these anomalies on your MRI but they DON'T MATCH THE SYMPTOMS your having"
Like Sarno, they knew exactly where each spot on the spine should effect and were troubled by the lack of a match. Sarno pointed out that TMS is a REGIONAL process, and that's why the symptoms are so peculiar.
I really LIKED both of these guys but got frustrated that I wasn't getting better , SO I left them for the braggart, cocky little NBA surgeon who assured me he'd fix me....and then sent me to the chronic pain dumpster when I didn't respond.

So, I was personally responsible for the 50k dollar surgery... I wanted something to change and gave up on calm, cool professionalism for gimcrack du jour. I had access to humble, self effacing Drs but chose the other. My Dumb.

I do sometimes think about how this multi-billion dollar industry is all founded on a lie. It gives me pause when I think "I know" about other scientific presumptions and it makes me really grateful for Sarno and Co, because he was mercilessly ragged on by his peers. It also has made me a bit of a tin-foil hat guy as regards other stuff like this covid...at least their stats and assumptions.

Two idea's. One, My sponsor (spiritual mentor) always pointed out to me that it's all 'House money' and I was born without any and I am leaving without any. It belongs to this world and it even has pictures of politicians on it! yuccch. One day of life is worth more than they can print.

Two, God is faithful. When we go knocking and looking for answers, they do show up if I am open minded and persistent. I let Pentecostals pray over me and I don't even subscribe to their beliefs. I thought they were kinda weird... but two weeks later I found Sarno! Whose to say their prayers didn't work? Not Me.

So... if it took every penny I owned, it was still worth it cause TMS sucks. . and that's why I try to share it with as many people as possible. I owe it to God and Sarno and the world because it gave me what I asked for.