Day 1 acceptance level, doubts & fears

[Timothy007ish]

Having had some success with TMS recovery in the past I would say that my acceptance level of the diagnosis is good. In fact I'm sure TMS is the only reasonable explanation for my symptoms.

My background is one of childhood sexual abuse and I have had great difficulty learning how to simply talk about it. Feeling the feelings and processing them has been next to impossible. My feelings feel like they are bigger than me and could possibly consume me if I 'let go'.

Obviously this is my greatest source of doubt and fear. Doubt that I will have the courage to face the feelings and fear that if I do I'll be overwhelmed.

 

[Walt Oleksy (RIP 2021)]

I think an emphasis on feeling what causes emotions to give us pain is not really necessary. It can keep us too focused on the emotion. For me, it was just discovering that I was repressing some emotions since I was seven and my parents divorced. I don't think you have to go back and feel your emotions when you were sexually abused as a child. Just tell yourself that is the main thing troubling you, and your subconscious will get it.
Dr, Sarno says we don't have to solve any emotional problem... just discover it. Believing in TMS is enough to heal. Try now to get on with your life... one day at a time... live in the present, not the past.

 

[Timothy007ish]

I think an emphasis on feeling what causes emotions to give us pain is not really necessary. It can keep us too focused on the emotion. For me, it was just discovering that I was repressing some emotions since I was seven and my parents divorced. I don't think you have to go back and feel your emotions when you were sexually abused as a child. Just tell yourself that is the main thing troubling you, and your subconscious will get it.
Dr, Sarno says we don't have to solve any emotional problem... just discover it. Believing in TMS is enough to heal. Try now to get on with your life... one day at a time... live in the present, not the past.

Thank you for your reply. I'm already experiencing some success. This morning I was able to get in a 8+ mile run with no pain. Two days ago I couldn't barely go 3 miles without serious suffering. And all I did was recite from what I could remember of the 12 affirmations.

I am really trying to get on with my life and use revisiting the past only for learning.
However, maybe I misunderstood, but my take on the Week 0 material especially Allen Gordon's TMS Recovery Program suggests that feeling, expressing and experiencing the repressed emotions was good.
All I want to do is work this program to the best of my ability to gain the desired results.
I have no illusions about my history. I know that I have been emotionally damaged. I know that I have trouble feeling emotions, and I am realizing that years of self deception have blinded me as to their magnitude.
Can it be so simple that all that is necessary is to acknowledge that I am damaged and move on?
Oh happiness. I don't enjoy introspection. I would like to be free of the pain of the past(however manifested I my present emotions and fears) that seems to keep popping up like some kind of morbid wack-a-mole game.

 

[Walt Oleksy (RIP 2021)]

I'm not big on "feel the feelings." For me, it was more important to discover the emotions I was repressing and move on from there, to think positive and believe that I was already free of pain, and I was. Feeling the repressed feelings would have kept me in the past, but it was better for me to live in the present.

 

[Timothy007ish]

I'm loving this all the more. I can do this.
Dr Sarno's 12 affirmations are the perfect set of rails to keep me on track, believing that I am free of the pain. Experience is already providing me with more evidence that it is an irrefutable fact.
I can't argue with this morning's results.
Even several hours later, I am a little bit sore but the good sore that comes from worked out muscles. My pain really was psychological not physical.