HappyLittleClouds
Peer Supporter
Hey everyone,
I just wanted to post an update. It's been 4 years since my original post and 3 years since my positive update.
Just a summary: I've struggled my whole life with mind-body symptoms including widespread chronic pain/fibromyalgia, TMJ, migraines, headaches, menstrual issues, panic attacks, IBS. From 2017 for about four years or so, it became very severe. I struggled with severe CFS and then also agoraphobia that left me bedridden, then using a wheelchair, and even after I could walk again, I was homebound because I was getting so many terrifying symptoms when leaving the house. Discovering the science on the mind-body connection through the Curable app was the breakthrough that helped me start getting more control over my life.
When I updated you guys, I had gone from a really restricted life mostly inside my home to finally being able to get out of the house and socialize, do some movement activities like long walks, short bike rides, etc. My life was starting to look halfway normal even if my energy levels weren't very high.
Fast forward a few years and I'm doing more than I could have ever imagined. No, I'm not pain or symptom free. I still deal with a lot of those symptoms. That's the bad new. The good news is that it no longer controls my life. I can do SOOO much more now than back then -- or even before my downward spiral in 2017. I have been able to participate in intensive physical activities like martial arts and dance. Since a few years I've been pursuing my creative ambitions, starting so share my music and perform publicly, which I was always way to scared to do before. I've also been able to travel again to places across the globe and tolerate difficult conditions. I am working freelance from home and coping with full time hours. I'm generally trying to live my life aligned with love rather than fear. Trying to make the most of each day.
Has all of this been a breeze? Am I "pain free"? Absolutely not! I still get a lot of anxiety and sometimes panic attacks. If I over-do it, I get ill. But my stress tolerance is MUCH higher. And I have gotten to know my own boundaries better -- that's how I've been able to expand them. None of this happened overnight. The whole time it has felt like taking one baby step forward, two steps back. Snail's pace. But when I look back over the past 4 years, the changes are dramatic. I'm much more in charge of my own life now instead of the symptoms controlling everything. My symptoms aren't gone but they also aren't worse because of all the new things I'm doing. If anything they are better. But they go up and down to remind me to take care of myself.
I am finding that balance between avoiding/fleeing every activity at the first sign of discomfort vs. pushing through and overdoing it. There's a sweet spot in the middle where I challenge myself to do new things and tolerate some anxiety, but don't traumatize myself. That's how growth happens.
How did I do this? Primarily I worked with the exercises from the Curable app as well as getting regular support from a good therapist who is aware of mind-body issues. Go with baby steps and celebrate the smallest wins. When I went from only being able to lay flat in bed to being able to sit upright in bed, that was a HUGE win. It doesn't seem like much. But that was just as important as when I performed at a concert for the first time, or was able to keep up through a martial arts class for the first time. And find the little things to appreciate in your life NOW. Sometimes we get so caught up in our pasts and futures that we forget what we have now. What have you always wanted to do that you feel like you can't do because of your symptoms? Is there some way you can adapt it so you can do it today? If you want to dance but you can't get out of bed, can you find a way to make a bed-dance? Get creative and take inspiration from others who have gone this path too.
Happy to answer anyone's questions. Keep going and don't give up hope.
I just wanted to post an update. It's been 4 years since my original post and 3 years since my positive update.
Just a summary: I've struggled my whole life with mind-body symptoms including widespread chronic pain/fibromyalgia, TMJ, migraines, headaches, menstrual issues, panic attacks, IBS. From 2017 for about four years or so, it became very severe. I struggled with severe CFS and then also agoraphobia that left me bedridden, then using a wheelchair, and even after I could walk again, I was homebound because I was getting so many terrifying symptoms when leaving the house. Discovering the science on the mind-body connection through the Curable app was the breakthrough that helped me start getting more control over my life.
When I updated you guys, I had gone from a really restricted life mostly inside my home to finally being able to get out of the house and socialize, do some movement activities like long walks, short bike rides, etc. My life was starting to look halfway normal even if my energy levels weren't very high.
Fast forward a few years and I'm doing more than I could have ever imagined. No, I'm not pain or symptom free. I still deal with a lot of those symptoms. That's the bad new. The good news is that it no longer controls my life. I can do SOOO much more now than back then -- or even before my downward spiral in 2017. I have been able to participate in intensive physical activities like martial arts and dance. Since a few years I've been pursuing my creative ambitions, starting so share my music and perform publicly, which I was always way to scared to do before. I've also been able to travel again to places across the globe and tolerate difficult conditions. I am working freelance from home and coping with full time hours. I'm generally trying to live my life aligned with love rather than fear. Trying to make the most of each day.
Has all of this been a breeze? Am I "pain free"? Absolutely not! I still get a lot of anxiety and sometimes panic attacks. If I over-do it, I get ill. But my stress tolerance is MUCH higher. And I have gotten to know my own boundaries better -- that's how I've been able to expand them. None of this happened overnight. The whole time it has felt like taking one baby step forward, two steps back. Snail's pace. But when I look back over the past 4 years, the changes are dramatic. I'm much more in charge of my own life now instead of the symptoms controlling everything. My symptoms aren't gone but they also aren't worse because of all the new things I'm doing. If anything they are better. But they go up and down to remind me to take care of myself.
I am finding that balance between avoiding/fleeing every activity at the first sign of discomfort vs. pushing through and overdoing it. There's a sweet spot in the middle where I challenge myself to do new things and tolerate some anxiety, but don't traumatize myself. That's how growth happens.
How did I do this? Primarily I worked with the exercises from the Curable app as well as getting regular support from a good therapist who is aware of mind-body issues. Go with baby steps and celebrate the smallest wins. When I went from only being able to lay flat in bed to being able to sit upright in bed, that was a HUGE win. It doesn't seem like much. But that was just as important as when I performed at a concert for the first time, or was able to keep up through a martial arts class for the first time. And find the little things to appreciate in your life NOW. Sometimes we get so caught up in our pasts and futures that we forget what we have now. What have you always wanted to do that you feel like you can't do because of your symptoms? Is there some way you can adapt it so you can do it today? If you want to dance but you can't get out of bed, can you find a way to make a bed-dance? Get creative and take inspiration from others who have gone this path too.
Happy to answer anyone's questions. Keep going and don't give up hope.
