4.5 Years of Chronic Pain Resolved in 2 Months

https://www.tmswiki.org/forum/threads/where-were-you-a-year-ago.33399/

 

This is fantastic. Congratulations

 

Thanks! It’s still a struggle, but one filled with a lot more hope.

 

Cool so this makes a lot of sense to me. Basically, you freaked out initially (of course you would, anyone would), and it got worse as a result of this freak out UNTIL you had it confirmed that you had no hearing loss/infection. Naturally, because you got that confirmation from a medical expert that you were actually ok and nothing was wrong with you (and you didn't need medication), your fear dropped and it got better (typical TMS).

Then, you went on a vacation with your mum (stressful for its own reasons - and there is a pattern here with parents which makes sense), and this was so conflicting and stressful (for whatever reason) that your brain, having remembered the symptom pathways from a month ago, turned them back on in order to protect you. Had you known about TMS at that time, it might not have happened like that, but because you didn't, naturally you would have started to think (even subconsciously) "have they missed something"? - the fear returns which fuels the chronicity of the symptoms.

I'll stop there so it doesn't become confusing and we can work with what I said above, but a question to finish based on this (and I've assumed the answer in part above but I should ask you). If you thought it was a setback but that you'd get better from it - and note this is before you knew about TMS because you said after 1 week of this you found it - what did you actually think was going on? I.e. When it came back on the vacation but before you knew about TMS, what did you think was going on? Because you'd already had confirmation from the doctor you were ok, but obviously that didn't align with symptoms coming back on that vacation, so I'm just curious as to what your thoughts and headspace was in the time between the flare up on vacation and finding out about TMS.

 

I ask my partner to not watch the news when im in the room. I say im perfectly alright not knowing.

 

Eh, not really. I was freaking out a shit ton still. It isn’t all that comforting to hear: “We dont know whats wrong with you, get the hell out my office.” ENT had this incredibly dismissive tone. It didnt get better because of anything i did. I was freaking out about all noise. It just slowly got better and that obviously did decrease fear.

So I just saw it for what it was pretty much. Sounds are loud and that makes me uncomfortable. ‘How am i gonna get sounds softer again?’ I hysterically tried stopping wearing earplugs as much as possible but that just made me feel really unsafe and uncomfortable (“Oh no will that be a setback, my tinnitus is spiking and im so scared and my entire body is in shock.”). I was fully expecting it to go away but it didnt. And now almost 2 years have passed and I’m still really not doing great.

I wasnt all that concerned about ‘physical damage’. I have had a ton of injuries and they always seemed to heal. I had a lot of experience with being tired or burnt out and they could never find anything wrong. I wasnt all that concerned about what the ENT said. If anything a little hearing loss would be nice right now.

 

I wonder if @painexplained_tms would like to give us some advice here.

Maybe what she sees in practice a lot.

Things you do need to do vs what you do not need to do.

What she sees gets most rapid results.

From what I gather from the content on Instagram is only working with woman who can still manage to work.
Not with people who cant.
Only high achievers.
Although im sure most of us would be high achievers and living our lives if it was not for the chronic sensations.

I have to say Adam the coach in here is at least willing to participate and give aome advice from the kindness of his heart. And one does very much appreciate that.

I wish there were more coaches willing to impart some free wisdom which does not leave you scratching your head after.

I personally find nothing more irritating than lots of coaching pages saying something abstract like theres nothing to fix but you need to identify the cause. Join my programme to find out how. This is fear inducing. For me it makes one feel like that unless I pay a fortune I will never know what my problem is.

Sorry I am rambling again.

 

I believe in that too, that changing thoughts is also a neuroplasticity exercise and it takes time and repetition. The changes I talk about are the ones at the core of one's identity. Deep fear of rejection, shame, victimization, hatred towards oneself, avoidance of emotions... you know, things that were already there before TMS hit for real, adding to the fear state before pain played its part.

Yep, and here's what troubles me. The videos out there get too attached to the "symptoms not structural" issue (understandably, that's what scares people the most), but I think there needs to be a strong emphasis on the "btw your mind isn't broken either" part of TMS healing.

 

Yep, and here's what troubles me. The videos out there get too attached to the "symptoms not structural" issue (understandably, that's what scares people the most), but I think there needs to be a strong emphasis on the "btw your mind isn't broken either" part of TMS healing.

THIS!

 

Completely agree

 

You might like Maggie Sterling's channel. She's more about understanding one's nervous system is oversensitized, and soothing techniques like meditation might not be effective at all at this moment.

 

Hmm I get you - what would you put it down to in terms of you getting better the first time, or no clue? It's a great sign regardless as it's clear proof it's possible to get back there

Surely you had to label it somehow? You didn't look up your symptoms and self-diagnose? If you knew you had tinnitus at the time, why did you think it was happening? If I were you, I'd be looking for an explanation for my symptoms all day on google, even if it was right or wrong (before I knew about TMS, assuming I believed it was TMS).

So you did think you were injured? How much concern you had is not really where I'm going with it (as you mentioned you had experience with injuries healing), I'm more trying to establish what you actually think was going on - I.e. why were you having the symptoms before you knew about TMS?

 

Im sick of res

Im sick of research and trying to figure it out to be honest. Its driving me crazy.

Why some people get better quickly and others dont I do not know.

 

Stimuli.

How often is the brain over - stimulated?

Maybe there is too much time spent on screens daily and it makes the brain more anxious, depressed, tense, afraid, over - analytical etc. Meditation helps. Also spending less than 2-3 hours/day on screens. So the mental health is not affected.

Just saying...

 

I think the problem is meditation has been so westernized and subsequently people use it for low level goals, I want to be more productive or I want to be pain free. Historically people have been meditating to achieve spiritual success, to connect with god, or your higher self and to transcend life/death cycles. People should aim higher with meditation and simultaneously let go of expectations and just see what happens. We expect too much too soon. Any sort of big change takes time. And people hold over stuff from childhood where they think they’re a failure if they can’t instantly do something and think if they can’t instantly concentrate while meditating it’s a loss or a waste of time. Even just trying or succeeding for a second is a win. But we’re so (understandably) stuck in doomer mode that we can’t find it in ourselves to honor our wins.

 

R u healed?

 

Sometimes.

 

I mean, hyperacusis isnt a disease or real diagnosis, its just a symptom. I wasnt all that bothered by the tinnitus, it wasnt a big problem. There wasnt really anything to self diagnose mate. Thats weird for me to say but i just quickly realized that i should get off the tinnitus forums and just try to live my life.

Ive thought about it but theres no way to be sure and i dont really think it matters all that much. Id say my system just got overstimulated after second exposure. I was really trying not to freak out – really responding better than after first exposure – but i think the subconscious just yeah i dont know i couldnt get my body to actually calm down.

I am finding it very hard to deal with this. The big question is ‘how will i make sounds less loud again?’ I’ve been taken by surprise cuz i was doing really well and seemingly out of nowhere i took a hit and now im suddenly doing not so great.

Yeah its difficult man. When i was doing the least tms work it did get better and after it did not. I did obviously try to replicate my attitude of when i did get better but sadly to no avail.

I feel like I’m pretty calm and conveying safety.

But like this has kind of become a problem in and of itself. Ive had other ‘chronic pain’ issues since this all started but theyve all gone away.

Yeah man I just dont really know what to do. Im more sensitive, do i start wearing more earpro? I dont want to but i also dont want to create a conditioned response.

Babystepping is how some community members did get out of this. ‘1 minute first day, 2 minutes second day, 3 minutes third day. Unfortunately that also just did not do it for me. I found it very hard to create a positive feeling with the sound.

Its weird because i was doing quite well and im really trying to stay calm, but it does make me unsure. I just dont really feel in control when my body can just start doing weird shit like this.

Bloody tms