Day 30 Reintegrating old joyful activites

30 seems like a nice number to do an update.

My pain symptoms exist as tension headaches (which I've had for almost 3 years) and shoulder/neck pain (which I've had for 8 months). I also have anxiety/depression, which while still there, has made major improvements. I've been trying to do old activities that have been hindered by my symptoms: yoga, gardening, and reading novels.

Yoga/Gardening - Shoulder/Neck Pain
Just this past week I was able to do a full-length (i.e. 1 hour) hot yoga class, where I was able to use my upper body strength. The pain was still there and my mobility was limited, but I was able to get through the whole class. So in terms of not letting the pain boss me around, that was a huge accomplishment. I've also been doing a lot of gardening work, involving lots of shoveling and bending over. In fact, I spent much of yesterday shoveling top soil, and even though I felt pain, I tried to make sure I was aware of my thought patterns during the entire day. It's amazing how I never feel like I'm doing a good job.

Reading Novels - Tension Headaches
The trickier part of all this is the tension headaches. I've had them for longer, and they really create a considerable amount of brain fog. It becomes very hard to focus on things, even if I'm meditating. Reading, or quality reading, has become a huge challenge for me. When I say 'quality', I mean that it's hard to keep focused on stories. A while back I would be able to read semi-dense fiction: nothing crazy, but stories that would have lots of characters and inter-woven plots and constant scene changes. Now it seems I can only really read non-fiction stuff. I seem to read a lot of autobiographies/biographies now because of having on one narrator and a linear plot. So one of my challenges is not letting my brain fog/lack of focus intimidate me. So I've started to read a novel, and am trying to push through (not in a bullheaded way, though) when I'm feeling overwhelmed or confused. I have to reread paragraphs and all that, but I'm making progress. Reading used to be a real joy, but since these headaches came around, I basically gave it up. So I'm attempting to reintegrate it into my life.

I'd be lying if I haven't been discouraged by the pace of my recovery, but I'm trying to stay hopeful and educate myself as much as I can about this stuff. Thanks for the support!