Day 1 A New Beginning

Hello to you all. My name is Matt, I'm 27 years old. I've had chronic shoulder/neck area pain for over 3 years. I was initially introduced to Dr. Sarno's theory by watching a clip on John Stossel's FBN show in 2015. I found my way here to the forum and went through about 3 weeks of the Structured Educational Program before succumbing to my old habits of dealing with pain: ice, rest, anti-inflammatory medication, stretching, etc. The pain was worse than ever after those first 3 weeks; all the journaling, reading, and forum posting had caused my brain to "protect" itself by distracting me from the root causes of my pain. My mind truly did not want to deal with the strong emotions and past issues that were surfacing.

I gave in. I just wanted the pain to ease up a little. I've been treating the pain as a physical problem: more NSAIDs, massages, rest, ice, physical therapy. I've been in varying degrees of pain since May 2015, my first attempt at TMS recovery. The pain is with me every day, it's often the first thing I think about in the morning and the last thing I think about when falling asleep. I've missed out on so much over the last 3+ years. It's affected all aspects of my life detrimentally. I'm not the person I used to be. My health, my sanity is on the line. The thought of dealing with this pain for decades is terrifying. I'm ready to accept the path this time, in a way I wasn't in 2015. I need to address the emotional issues that caused these physical symptoms. And they must be strong, because my brain has decided that physical agony is preferable.

I have accepted that I have TMS, a condition in which chronic pain came about as a distraction from dealing with emotional distress. Although I believed in TMS when first attempting the program in 2015, I found myself doubting whether I could one day become completely free of pain. I thought I would be the anomaly. I've come to realize that I gave up too soon. That won't happen again.

Thank you to everyone that makes this support forum happen. I'm here to be supported and encourage others in their journey.

- Matt

 

Hi, Matt. I'm so glad you are starting TMS again. You didn't believe in TMS 100 percent before, and that's what kept you from healing. So long as you think your pain is from anything structural, it will remain, because as you have learned from past medical treatment, nothing is structurally wrong with you. It sounds simple, but it takes a lot of belief in TMS.

Journaling is bound to bring up repressed emotions that cause your pain. You just have to expect that. I suggest you try to discover those repressed emotions, but don't dwell on them. Even if it's only a list, knowing about them will reach your subconscious. And Dr. Sarno says you don't have to make any changes in your life... just acknowledge that you have the repressed emotions.

Try to stay away from any pain killers. They may only give temporary relief but they tend to make the pain worse over time. Doctors and pharmaceutical companies know this. so they just increase the dosage.