I recently had the opportunity to talk with the head of anesthesiology at he biggest hospital in town. For over an hour he shot down every idea I had about treating my worsening pains. He obviously didn't believe in treating chronic pain on any level except to say I should try to meditate, something I've already been doing for over 40 years. At the end of our interview I said 'you should never take away a patient's hope because that's all they have left sometimes'. He responded saying 'actually sometimes there is no hope and you might be better of accepting that rather than always trying to get help'. I was both crushed and furious. He basically told me to f-off and quit bothering doctors. I am already predisposed to feelings of gloom and despair and this interview helped cement my worst suicidal tendencies.
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Day 4 Worst thing doctor said...
- Thread starter Paxalot
- Start date
Hi Paxalot.
I really try to be nice and civil online, especially on this wonderful forum, but...that guy is full of sh*t! He's the one with no hope, which is why he has such a sour, miserable outlook. That makes me sad because that's exactly how that sort of attitude spreads, especially when health care professionals hand down that "judgment (sentence!)" from their high and mighty post. Think about all the folks who never question it. Ugh!!
No one should stop trying to get help until they are actually healed. I, too, looked for help in many places. I was willing to try a lot of different things and I knew the answer was out there. I kept finding pieces of the puzzle, but learning about TMS was my HUGE breakthrough!! This forum, the Structured Educational Program, and "The Mindbody Prescription" were all very helpful to me. I feel like I have a new body, with only occasional twinges of my old pain.
Your persistence led you to the right place! Just let the process happen, the letting go and the healing. Don't be hard on yourself and don't be in a hurry.
I really try to be nice and civil online, especially on this wonderful forum, but...that guy is full of sh*t! He's the one with no hope, which is why he has such a sour, miserable outlook. That makes me sad because that's exactly how that sort of attitude spreads, especially when health care professionals hand down that "judgment (sentence!)" from their high and mighty post. Think about all the folks who never question it. Ugh!!
No one should stop trying to get help until they are actually healed. I, too, looked for help in many places. I was willing to try a lot of different things and I knew the answer was out there. I kept finding pieces of the puzzle, but learning about TMS was my HUGE breakthrough!! This forum, the Structured Educational Program, and "The Mindbody Prescription" were all very helpful to me. I feel like I have a new body, with only occasional twinges of my old pain.
Your persistence led you to the right place! Just let the process happen, the letting go and the healing. Don't be hard on yourself and don't be in a hurry.
BruceMC
Beloved Grand Eagle
The anesthesiologist's reply characterizes the attitude of the whole "pain management" industry that medicates pain because they cannot eradicate it. When I mentioned to a Stanford anesthesiologist about the possible role of the unconscious mind and repressed emotions in the generation of chronic pain symptoms, he said, "Yes, you're unconscious when you're knocked out".
The double irony, though, is that the same Stanford anesthesiologist with the smart mouth also has been suffering with lower back pain and sciatica ever since he was 40 years old, had a big divorce, lost his house and became addicted to pain pills and alcohol. Rehab (of course) at a fancy clinic in the Bahamas, same one used by Eric Clapton and other rock stars to kick their bad habits. And he's the one who won't admit that his chronic pain might be psychological in origin! Perfectionist, over-achieving, obsessive-compulsive, continuously worried about growing old and making more money. What more can you say?
For a little more perspective on your doctor's attitude, Paxalot, you might want to check out Chapter 6 of Steve Ozanich's book, The Great Pain Deception, entitled "Opposition to TMS: JSBS". JSBS is an acronym for "John Stossel's Brother Syndrome," which characterizes the intransigent, rigid opposition to TMS you encountered. Steve thinks it's all part of ego's defensive strategy. See what you think!
Stella
Well known member
Hi Paxalot,
I had to get out my plastic bat, shape my pillow like his head then go after it. Talk about feeling anger.
It is very sad, like you, how many others who have seen him and been so discouraged. Think about sending him a letter when you are significantly better. Get out all your anger.
I had to get out my plastic bat, shape my pillow like his head then go after it. Talk about feeling anger.
It is very sad, like you, how many others who have seen him and been so discouraged. Think about sending him a letter when you are significantly better. Get out all your anger.
Thanks for the encouragement. There really is a tendency among doctors make patients feel hopeless. I suspect many people go into medicine for the money and the status and that they have no real passion for helping people. I've consistently been made to feel I was on my own and the whole medical industry had no time for difficult cases like mine.
Forest
Beloved Grand Eagle
Paxalot - I had doctors tell me that I was never going to get better as well, and that really is the most disheartening thing that one can hear. What I can tell you is that both of our doctors are wrong. After having chronic pain for 18 years, I have now been pain free for working on 5 years. The chapter from the Great Pain Deception that Bruce mentioned provides some great insight into why so many people reject TMS.
Day 4 The worst thing the Dr. ever said.... Well, i guess pple have seen worse, but after two months of faithful PT and doing everything he recommended, i was still in a great deal of pain. I described it so well in minute detail. What it felt like, where it was, what i thought triggered it,,, (and btw he is a friend of mine) He just simply dismissed it by saying , "that's not where we expect to see the pain coming from". Since structurally everything seemed fine and good,on MRI as an orthopedist he was done with me, with no ideas or suggestions as to how i could use my knee to successfully walk again.without pain..
Shanshu Vampyr
Well known member
I agree with all this. And would never tell people looking for pain salvation to stop looking for their cure. But would also caution those perfectionistic, obsessive TMSers not to work too hard at getting well.
I too have been through atleast 20 Dr's, searching and searching. Every test and believe me I had
them all, right down to a CT with contrast. It has taken me 8 long yrs and daily chronic pain to
really realize that this was not a physical problem. I have been through much in life as so many
others. It is stress. Feel confident, follow the program, follow Erik, Forest, and the many others,
they will lead you to a pain free life. They are wonderful! Write to Steve O!! Everyone here is
encouraging and will see you to the end of you pain and agony. Talk to Walt too, he is so helpful,
I just can't name enough, just believe and forget the Dr's. I've heard it all!! Nothing they can find
or operate on. Thank God!! Nancy
them all, right down to a CT with contrast. It has taken me 8 long yrs and daily chronic pain to
really realize that this was not a physical problem. I have been through much in life as so many
others. It is stress. Feel confident, follow the program, follow Erik, Forest, and the many others,
they will lead you to a pain free life. They are wonderful! Write to Steve O!! Everyone here is
encouraging and will see you to the end of you pain and agony. Talk to Walt too, he is so helpful,
I just can't name enough, just believe and forget the Dr's. I've heard it all!! Nothing they can find
or operate on. Thank God!! Nancy
Gigi
Well known member
I'm so sorry for your hurtful experience, Paxalot. That anesthesiologist must be a seriously unhappy man.
Last week I had the realization that every significant improvement in my health came about because of something I had read. That's an astounding thought, given the number of MDs that I've visited over the years!
A year ago I was in a wheelchair. Today I'm pain free most days, and back to walking at my "energetic" clip! My husband commented that he expected my health to only decline after last Fall. He never thought I'd come out of that wheelchair.
Never, never NEVER give up hope.
Blessings on your journey.
Last week I had the realization that every significant improvement in my health came about because of something I had read. That's an astounding thought, given the number of MDs that I've visited over the years!
A year ago I was in a wheelchair. Today I'm pain free most days, and back to walking at my "energetic" clip! My husband commented that he expected my health to only decline after last Fall. He never thought I'd come out of that wheelchair.
Never, never NEVER give up hope.
Blessings on your journey.
nowtimecoach
Well known member
What a great thread of conversation! And wow - unbelievable insensitivity on your doc.'s part. I understand as I've had kind of the same type of reaction. After I got over my hopelessness, despair and depression - something happened with that dour lack of diagnosis... it made me willing to read Sarno's book - which had been on my bookshelf for over a month! So what started out as horrible - "there is nothing we can do for you" ended up being my salvation!! Because it led me to TMS diagnosis and this indepth program for understanding it all.