My most recent incidence of TMS (and when I discovered I have TMS) has been approximately two and a half months of acute upper back and neck pain. Happily after only a week and a half my pain is a lot less, although it seems to change daily amd move to additional, new and exciting locations, I'm doing nearly everything I was before the problem developed and loving it. However, a stumbling block for me mentally has been an anti-depressant medication my doctor prescribed to deal with what he thought were over-firing nerve receptors. Anti-depressants, epilepsy and some other medications are also used for nerve related issues. Although I'm on a very low dose I still need to go off them gradually. I haven't been to the doctor about getting off it because although I'm convinced I have TMS I want to go to my doctor with even less symptoms to convince him. Does that seem like I'm hedging my bets? Also, I joined an acapella group last night and went to my first rehearsal (fun but not quite Pitch Perfect). Anyway while I was there I realized I had forgotten to take the medication and my pain increased significantly. I have been telling subconcsious that the medication does not mean there is anything wrong with me. Not quite sure what to do now.
Hi Zoe,
It's great that you've seen success with the TMS work. Noticing your symptoms move is a great indication of symptom impariitive at play. If you are not already doing so, I'd recommend keeping an evidence sheet to track your symptoms and enforce your belief.
I can understand your need to stop taking meditation. But the question I've always asked myself is, will I be fully functional without meds? Are they providing relief or are they yet another crutch?
I don't think you've realised how powerful your post is, but it appears you are are very anxious to heal. We all are. Without scaring you, for some of us healing from TMS is a life long journey. Since TMS symptoms are the manifestions of a life time of doing, we must really take a very softly softly approach with our inner child. If we are anxious, worry or set ourselves unachievable targets we are setting ourselves up for failure and can trigger new symptoms with greater severity.
If you feel you can absolutely manage the TMS with the knowledge that you've developed, that you could gradually reduce your medicine, of course under your Dr's supervision.
I'm not sure if you are already doing so, but I'd highly recommend that you incorporate mindfulness into your daily routine. Mindfulness, allows one to be more in tune with ones thoughts without reacting or responding. This, allowing you to create a space between you and any toxic thinking or behaviour that may be responsible for triggering your symptoms.
Finally, I'd like to add, please be kind, compassionate and loving to yourself, I know this work isn't easy, but it can be very rewarding uncovering who we really are.
God bless
