Dr. Zafirides What's the best way for me to deal with my fear

[Forest]

On behalf of the PPD/TMS Peer Network's Q&A with an Expert program, Peer Network member Enrique forwarded the following question to Dr. Peter Zafirides.

I’ve identified that I have some past and current stressors that bring up fears. I realize now that FEAR has been affecting me for my entire life. What’s the best way for me to deal with this?

Dr. Zafirides response is as follows:

This is another wonderful question. First off, fear is something that affects all of us. We are all in the same boat together as it relates to fear. How much we can take and how we deal with fear is where we may differ. For some individuals though, fear and other emotions will manifest themselves through physical symptoms, including pain.

Remember, in TMS, the feelings that lead to physical pain and other feelings of discomfort are more likely to be unconscious and out of our awareness. But, you bring up a very good point. Sometimes fear is the only emotional feeling we have signaling a deeper, unconscious emotional struggle.

It is very easy to say, and I mean no disrespect when I do, but the only way over that fear is through it. Give yourself permission to have those feelings of anxiety and fear. But don't let them prevent you from moving forward with TMS treatment. Often times, what people really fear is the uncertainty of their emotional response. They fear they will lose control, irrespective of if they actually would lose control.. For example, an individual may be fairy afraid to drive on the highway for fear of a panic attack. The only way to eliminate that fear is, at some point, they need to get on the highway. What likely happens is that the anxiety is very uncomfortable for the first few minutes, but it is not disabling, and certainly not to the point where someone "loses control". The important part is, that the anxiety will peak and then begin to decline. Until one experiences that and can put their arms around exactly what the anxiety will be like, we fear the worst. And when we are uncertain of the outcome, fear is a common emotion that results.
So as it relates to you, give yourself permission to experience the fear. In all likelihood the anxiety that may come from starting the TMS work will be less than what you are fearing right now. Hopefully it will be much less.. But that is the purpose of the anxiety, to prevent you from taking that chance and getting started.

Keep in mind, you are in total control. As it relates to this program, it is the minds intention to provoke either a physical or emotional symptom because it fears losing control of its response to unwanted emotions. In reality, there is no threat here. Through the TMS work, you are trying to do something good for yourself. You are trying to do something very healthy - and very healing - for your self. Allow yourself the compassion and forgiveness so that you can move forward in the program.

If the pain, physical or emotional, is too much once you have started then you decide if you can continue. But give yourself permission to at least begin the work of TMS.

You can absolutely do this!!

Never doubt how truly powerful you are...

Dr. Zafirides is President of Central Ohio Behavioral Medicine, Inc. (COBMI), Clinical Assistant Professor at Ohio State University’s Department of Psychiatry, and Staff Psychiatrist at Southeast, Inc. His area of interest within psychiatry is the mind-body role of emotions in physical illness - specifically chronic pain. He has been published in this area of psychiatry, lecturing both nationally and internationally on this topic. Dr. Zafirides has received Best Doctors In America recognition for 7 consecutive years since 2005. He has also been recognized nationally with the Patients' Choice Award in 2008, 2010 and 2011 as well as the Compassionate Doctor Award in 2010. His website is http://www.thehealthymind.com/

 

[Marla]

Thanks for posting this. It's hard to push through fear, but you have to do it to overcome it.

 

[Forest]

Until one experiences that and can put their arms around exactly what the anxiety will be like, we fear the worst. And when we are uncertain of the outcome, fear is a common emotion that results.

Taking this a step forward, I think a lot of people fear the TMS/PPD approach because they just don't know if it will work. When I first started the PPD approach, it was after I tried tons of other approaches and treatments, none of which helped. I think there is this little thought in people's heads that says here is another approach that will probably not work, which leads to the thought that if this doesn't work then what will? Personally, I think I feared that I would never be myself again. But once I confronted this fear, understood why I had it, and committed to this approach it faded away.

I did something similar to how I got over my fear of roller coasters. When I was young I was afraid of roller coasters. They scared me to death and I wouldn't go on any of the big ones. But then I just watched tons of other people going on them and told myself, over and over and over again, that nothing terrible is happening to these people, and eventually I overcame my fear (however I still get knots in my stomach when I wait in line). With my symptoms, sure I was afraid to be active again. But I read so many stories of people who fully recovered that I thought, "Hey, if it works for them, it will work for me." I gave the approach a try and sure enough I was able to overcome both my fear and symptoms.

When it comes down to it, I think the biggest help in overcoming my fear was simply accepting the diagnosis. I had to accept that I had PPD and not a structural problem, and that the reason nothing else worked was because I never treated the cause only the symptoms. We fear PPD because of past treatment failures, but this doesn't make sense because all of the previous treatments I tried did not understand the actual problem. PPD treatment is inherently different from all past treatments because it is the only one that address the actual cause of our symptoms. As Dr. Z mentioned, it's all about taking that chance and getting started with the program.

 

[Beach-Girl]

I have a lot of faith in the diagnosis although I still have a long way to go. I even took out "alternative therapies" from my health insurance plan just minutes ago - I am so sure that this is the problem.

But yeah - the fear part has me. And I am struggling my way past it.And of course my ramped anxiety levels. Everyday there is something new. I tried to work on some new mantras for today. We'll see how it goes.

BG

 

[dabatross]

forest you made a good point here.. look into your past and say "i've tried everything there is to do physically for this problem. what do i have to lose by going the PPD/TMS route?" thats the boat i'm in right now ive actually made a list of all of the things ive done to try and treat this problem and have seen they didn't work. what is the point of continually doing the same old things you tried already to fix the issue when you could be doing something new that will actually work. yeah one of those things that is feared would be "is this going to work or is it going to be another thing i try and doesn't work at all for me and then im screwed". if you go into it with that attitude you're putting yourself up for failure right from the get go. my new favorite quote is "what you fear you will create" so if you fear that the TMS/PPD treatment program won't work for you like the other stuff you tried in the past didn't then you're sure enough probably going to experience failure. i've learned to change my negative thought patterns on treatments because its not doing me any good. i think other people on this forum have the same problem because you dont want to waste any more time on crap that isn't going to work. you get frustrated with doctors who haven't fixed you and then you run across things like treatments for MBS and you see the doubt that most mainstream doctors have for it. this makes you question and doubt the process but you just have to overlook that.

 

[sewmuch]

Taking this a step forward, I think a lot of people fear the TMS/PPD approach because they just don't know if it will work. When I first started the PPD approach, it was after I tried tons of other approaches and treatments, none of which helped. I think there is this little thought in people's heads that says here is another approach that will probably not work, which leads to the thought that if this doesn't work then what will? Personally, I think I feared that I would never be myself again. But once I confronted this fear, understood why I had it, and committed to this approach it faded away.

I did something similar to how I got over my fear of roller coasters. When I was young I was afraid of roller coasters. They scared me to death and I wouldn't go on any of the big ones. But then I just watched tons of other people going on them and told myself, over and over and over again, that nothing terrible is happening to these people, and eventually I overcame my fear (however I still get knots in my stomach when I wait in line). With my symptoms, sure I was afraid to be active again. But I read so many stories of people who fully recovered that I thought, "Hey, if it works for them, it will work for me." I gave the approach a try and sure enough I was able to overcome both my fear and symptoms.

When it comes down to it, I think the biggest help in overcoming my fear was simply accepting the diagnosis. I had to accept that I had PPD and not a structural problem, and that the reason nothing else worked was because I never treated the cause only the symptoms. We fear PPD because of past treatment failures, but this doesn't make sense because all of the previous treatments I tried did not understand the actual problem. PPD treatment is inherently different from all past treatments because it is the only one that address the actual cause of our symptoms. As Dr. Z mentioned, it's all about taking that chance and getting started with the program.

I feel the roller coaster fear a lot on airplanes, when I cannot see the ground, especially at night, when it is bumpy and over water. Hmmm, something to think about this fear and TMS....