Day 42 What I learned about myself

I made it to day 42. It has taken me more than 42 days to get here. I have learned that I am (and have been) quite hard on myself and demanding of my own performance and achievement in life and work, and I have learned that I can take a day off now and then! I have learned about my personality (goodist, perfectionist and legalist all mixed and sometimes fighting) and how it has contributed to my suppressing and repressing of emotions,which in turn has led to the various and sundry physical ailments I have had in my 49 years. I have learned that I am strong, and I can make decisions and move my body and go for a long walk if I want to. I have learned that I am not so fragile and can recover from many debilitating things. I have learned that I do have deep emotions that are still lurking and it is safe to feel them and let them emerge. I have learned that there are emotions that want to be felt in everyday situations that I still have the urge to suppress, and I have learned that it is safe to feel those, as well. I have learned that the reason doctors can't find anything physically wrong with me is that there isn't anything physically wrong with me.

Thank you, everyone, who has encouraged me along the way. I'm so grateful to have found this forum.

 

Hi Aimee,

I feel so happy and relaxed reading your post. I hope that many people read your words. I am struck with the courage it takes to walk this "TMS path" as you have done.

What wonderful fruits there are to understand yourself more, and what an interesting, magical human experience we get to have!!

Andy

 

Well done on getting there Aimee, sounds like it has been a very worthwhile journey. I’ve nearly finished Alan Gordon’s program and the SEP is my next port of call, I hope I learn as much as you have