The link between job dissatisfaction and TMS

[Shakermaker]

But let's recap: You've stated that you are dissatisfied with your work choices, that you made a pragmatic choice for financial security, and that for you, this is not really acceptable. You are wondering how this has affected your health (TMS) and you are worried that it might affect your health in the future. You are allowing your brain to maintain a negative frame of mind by consistently using negative words to describe your job. This might be compounded by guilt, because you know there are plenty of people who would be happy to have a stable government job.

Consider this: it appears that you are reacting to being judged negatively for your choice. And lord knows, we humans really hate being judged.

Obviously, you are judging yourself. But it's really not "you" who is doing the judging. This judgement came from somewhere, and it probably came from the past. Who else is judging you? The answer to that question is not necessarily someone who is currently in your life - in fact, it's most likely to be from your past. Parental expectations never leave us - and we tend to apply their expectations to others that we form relationships with later on.

This is where you need to fight against your brain's attempt to keep repressing memories from your past. If you sense that happening, you need to just go for it, no matter how uncomfortable it makes you feel.

This is interesting. In my case my Dad is definitely involved. I work in HR and when I went into it 12 years ago, he was really disappointed, saying all they do in HR is make contracts and fire people. But now he is the most vociferous of people telling me not to change my job because the income is so good and stable etc.

Maybe in my case there is some perfectionism going on. My work doesn't particularly interest me, therefore I don't or can't be a really great performer in the field and build up my skills. Maybe my superego is telling me I should be a star performer and loved by everybody at work and just generally considered wonderful. Maybe it's telling me I'm a failure for not having fulfilling work. Or conversely, maybe it's my id screaming "i don't want to do this sh**, this is boring" and my superego is fighting back saying "leaving this income and stability could make me an economic failure". Man this is confusing.

I also don't like being at parties and when people I don't know ask what I do and I say HR, it's like they are instantly turned off. So maybe I'm being ruled by other people's judgments too.

But like Lowella I also feel a need to do something that really helps people and I think it's important to try our best to fulfil our deepest needs right?

 

[lowella]

shakermaker, I think you're on the right track - ALL of those things you mention are in my head as well. Probably no coincidence. Also I think I can add that a kind person pm'd me and noted that I DO have a relation to a family member and their thoughts, directly in some of my work, which may very well add significantly to the load. So perhaps some journaling for us about some family members for a while...you're right, it often feels confusing! Best wishes with it and maybe next year we will be counseling others here on these same issues

 

[Tms_joe]

It was a major contributor to my TMS. I was pressuring the hell out of myself to continue down the high income path I had paved. HATED my job and especially the people I worked for. That pressure and feeling of being trapped is just awful. If you're unwilling to do something physically about it the struggle goes on in the brain. Of course you can accomplish nothing, but that’s what us TMS sufferers do.

I think even a personality type like mine could come to terms with a lackluster job and make it work while not suffering, but it’s a LOT of psychological rewriting. Outcome independence, killing the ego, just accepting what is. I’m pretty close to doing this In a different job that is not AS bad as the previous. More about boredom which lets this mind wander.

The thing is, with a clearer mind I’m finding id rather let the job be background noise and form a game plan to improve myself so I can get into a more fulfilling job.