Penny2007
formerly Pain2007
That's exactly what I did!
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Alan has completed the new Pain Recovery Program. To read or share it, use this updated link: https://www.tmswiki.org/forum/painrecovery/
birdsetfree
Well known member
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Penny2007
formerly Pain2007
So, I haven't taken Xanax in 2 nights. I didn't have any problem falling asleep, but I woke both nights in pain after a few hours and took a pain pill. Luckily I was able to fall back asleep though it wasn't a great sleep.
I feel like I'm taking one step forward, 2 steps back. I get better and then feel crappy again. My anxiety has been bad in the morning except for today when it hit me more in the afternoon when my pain started soring. Perhaps it's an extinction burst since I've been hitting on some good stuff with my therapist.
I'm thinking of taking Xanax again tonight to get a good night sleep.
I feel like I'm taking one step forward, 2 steps back. I get better and then feel crappy again. My anxiety has been bad in the morning except for today when it hit me more in the afternoon when my pain started soring. Perhaps it's an extinction burst since I've been hitting on some good stuff with my therapist.
I'm thinking of taking Xanax again tonight to get a good night sleep.
birdsetfree
Well known member
I know this is tough but you are preoccupied with the pain, that is what will keep it going. When you go to bed expect the pain to wake you. When it does reassure yourself that the pain is harmless, work on soothing yourself with loving words like you would that scared inner child. Use the somatic tracking method that Alan G talks about in his new programme. Tell your brain you know what it is doing so stop. Cultivate indifference to the pain because after all it is just your own mind creating it. Use all your tools that you are gaining. Then wait. Live. Reassess the way you/others are treating you. Time will pass and this will resolve.
I believe taking calming medication that the Doctor has prescribed can be helpful temporarily but I would always try the above methods first and keep the drugs as a last resort.
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Penny2007
formerly Pain2007
Thanks - have been trying all of what you mention. I've started TMS therapy too. I have even managed to reduce the meds a lot, including the Xanax. But I feel the pressure of trying too hard with all these things as well.
It's early morning here and I've had a bad night despite taking Xanax before bed. Woke every 2 hours in pain and the pain meds aren't helping
It's very hard for me to function when I don't get enough sleep. Although I know it's all being caused by my brain, I'm willing to try anything else that may reduce this pain, like acupuncture.
I had been feeling a lot better re: the pain and anxiety and this just hit me hard again yesterday so maybe it's an extinction burst that Alan G. speaks of.
It's early morning here and I've had a bad night despite taking Xanax before bed. Woke every 2 hours in pain and the pain meds aren't helping
It's very hard for me to function when I don't get enough sleep. Although I know it's all being caused by my brain, I'm willing to try anything else that may reduce this pain, like acupuncture.I had been feeling a lot better re: the pain and anxiety and this just hit me hard again yesterday so maybe it's an extinction burst that Alan G. speaks of.
birdsetfree
Well known member
This is not about 'trying', this is about practising new pathways that take back control of your mind and body. Recovery is not linear. Don't get disappointed when you have symptoms as that will keep them going. It could be an extinction burst but either way the healthy mindset/behaviour is the same. It is great that you are feeling better, congratulate yourself for being on the right path and just keep going!
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Penny2007
formerly Pain2007
@birdsetfree - thanks. Still the perfectionist in me is "trying" to do everything right. Perhaps this is part of the problem solving mode my therapist discussed. He says my mind is always looking for things to solve, is always looking for a rabbit hole to go down. I put a lot of pressure on myself. It's hard to be otherwise because that's how I have been up until now. Be mindful, sooth yourself, do somatic tracking, don't focus on the pain, etc. etc. Am I doing it all right? Did I remember correctly what the therapist said? I don't know how to take the pressure off.
I just had an anxiety attack. Was in bed trying to go back to sleep. Pain meds had started working but then some mild anxiety hit because I guess the Xanax had worn off. I started shaking like crazy, jagged breathing and very dry mouth. My husband had to hold me and walk me around the house. It lasted for about 30 mins.
I just had an anxiety attack. Was in bed trying to go back to sleep. Pain meds had started working but then some mild anxiety hit because I guess the Xanax had worn off. I started shaking like crazy, jagged breathing and very dry mouth. My husband had to hold me and walk me around the house. It lasted for about 30 mins.
birdsetfree
Well known member
I'm sorry about that. Anxiety attacks are not pleasant at all. They can happen when we become overwhelmed by our own overthinking. Sounds like you have good support.
If I can offer you some comfort in all of this it would be that this will pass. Give yourself a break mentally by not thinking about all of this for a while, don't anticipate sleep or pain etc.
You are doing the best thing for yourself in my opinion by being on here, staying open to the effects of your mind on your body and working things through with a therapist. Pat yourself on the back for all of that. Stay on this path and grow into it.
Remind yourself that you are safe, practise self care and do things you love or find relaxing. Shifting your focus is hard to do but will get easier the more you practise it.
If I can offer you some comfort in all of this it would be that this will pass. Give yourself a break mentally by not thinking about all of this for a while, don't anticipate sleep or pain etc.
You are doing the best thing for yourself in my opinion by being on here, staying open to the effects of your mind on your body and working things through with a therapist. Pat yourself on the back for all of that. Stay on this path and grow into it.
Remind yourself that you are safe, practise self care and do things you love or find relaxing. Shifting your focus is hard to do but will get easier the more you practise it.
Penny2007
formerly Pain2007
Thanks very much. That's all the same advice my therapist gave me 
Indeed when I get busy with something, even housework, it helps because I'm in the moment and it's a type of mindfulness.
I'm not new to TMS. I've known I have it for at least 10 years. It started with just back pain. The anxiety is relatively new. I first felt it a few years back and went to a CBT therapist. That really helped and it didn't return until a year or 2 ago. but still, I coped and never took any medication for it. I only realized recently that the anxiety is also TMS.
Part of my anxiety is that even after 10 years of knowing this is TMS and working on myself (admittedly I've done very little work with therapists due to financial considerations), I still keep getting attacks and they seem worse to me each time. For example, even with bad back pain it didn't wake me at night and over the counter pills usually helped. Now, only the heavy stuff like Codene is helping which is addictive and has nasty side effects. So my mind starts to despair that I'm never going to conquer this entirely. Perhaps the new symptoms are just my mind finding new things as TMS.
Indeed when I get busy with something, even housework, it helps because I'm in the moment and it's a type of mindfulness.
I'm not new to TMS. I've known I have it for at least 10 years. It started with just back pain. The anxiety is relatively new. I first felt it a few years back and went to a CBT therapist. That really helped and it didn't return until a year or 2 ago. but still, I coped and never took any medication for it. I only realized recently that the anxiety is also TMS.
Part of my anxiety is that even after 10 years of knowing this is TMS and working on myself (admittedly I've done very little work with therapists due to financial considerations), I still keep getting attacks and they seem worse to me each time. For example, even with bad back pain it didn't wake me at night and over the counter pills usually helped. Now, only the heavy stuff like Codene is helping which is addictive and has nasty side effects. So my mind starts to despair that I'm never going to conquer this entirely. Perhaps the new symptoms are just my mind finding new things as TMS.
birdsetfree
Well known member
Your mind will try to trick you that each attack is 'different'. This is how it gets our attention. Neutralise the fear by realising it is all the same thing. You know what to do. Get busy with something else and pay it no attention. When you get the flare ups let that be an indication that you want to up your self care emotionally. There will be a period of time where you think nothings changing, just hang in there, be strong and stick to the tms plan. Let time pass and be patient, you are creating new pathways to relate to benign symptoms.
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Penny2007
formerly Pain2007
Still struggling & had a bad day yesterday but did an emergency session with my therapist which helped. He said to keep soothing myself and saying this will pass. It's really important to tell yourself this otherwise your brain goes to catastrophe mode thinking this will never go away, how will I ever function without sleep etc. Total despair. It helped during the night, together with Xanax. I slept in chunks and in different places in the house and didn't take any pain pills which he suggested I disengage from because I'm preoccupied with finding the right cocktail of pills and none really work consistently without side effect. This preoccupation is just feeding the pain. Woke this morning in pain and feeling depressed.
Therapist said, if you wake up in the middle of the night to tell yourself you can handle it. Do something. Don't try to problem solve the anxiety or pain. Tend to your anxiety , or work on creating safety for your primitive brain, try mindfulness or read a book. Do something. Trust that it will work.
The problem is tricky with sleep though because when you get very little, night after night you can't think straight.
Therapist said, if you wake up in the middle of the night to tell yourself you can handle it. Do something. Don't try to problem solve the anxiety or pain. Tend to your anxiety , or work on creating safety for your primitive brain, try mindfulness or read a book. Do something. Trust that it will work.
The problem is tricky with sleep though because when you get very little, night after night you can't think straight.
birdsetfree
Well known member
I like your therapists advice. Very reassuring.
It is tricky when you don't get enough sleep. Usually when that happens to me I try to have as normal a day as I can so that I am showing my brain that I am not going to let it get to me. I try to not think about going to bed at all. I just climb in when the time comes and read my book. Sleep usually follows. Chamomile tea helps calm me too.
It is tricky when you don't get enough sleep. Usually when that happens to me I try to have as normal a day as I can so that I am showing my brain that I am not going to let it get to me. I try to not think about going to bed at all. I just climb in when the time comes and read my book. Sleep usually follows. Chamomile tea helps calm me too.