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Questions/Ideas to Ponder

Discussion in 'General Discussion Subforum' started by Livvygurl, Jun 17, 2012.

  1. Livvygurl

    Livvygurl Well known member

    Hi All,

    I really appreciate everyone on this form, even guests that are just checking in and reading posts. This community has helped me to have more courage facing the challenges of TMS.

    I have some questions that have been swimming around in my mind about TMS. Feel free to answer them directly or philosophically, whatever mode you are in is fine.

    1. I wonder what commonalities that people with TMS have in terms of their childhood patterns, and family patterns.

    2. The idea of healing and being pain-free are interesting. What does this mean to you, how
    would being completely free of pain change your life?

    3. Some people say that TMS is a gift. If so, what does this mean to you, how has this experience
    offered you a new perspective about life?

    4. If you won a lunch date with Dr. Sarno what questions would you ask him?

    5. What role does humor play in your life?

    6. What is your relationship with your body like (on a good
    or bad day)?

    7. Feel free to make up your own question for the group.

    Thank you Peace and Healing,

    Livvy ~
  2. Forest

    Forest Beloved Grand Eagle

    Hiya Livygirl

    These are some really good questions and I will try to answer a couple of them. Some of them may need to be their own threads as well.

    To me, healing is being in control of your life. Having chronic pain prevents you from doing so many things that you enjoyed doing before your symptoms appeared. So much of your life revolves around your pain and your symptoms. You either think when are these symptoms going to go away or, if you unsymptomatic for a period, you think when will the pain start back up again.

    Being healed and pain free means that I am no longer focused on my symptoms and they no longer control my life. My healing really began when I started to think psychologically and no longer feared my symptoms. At first there was still some pain present, but I no longer obsessed over it and it stopped controlling my life. After awhile the symptoms faded away. Even now I may have the occasional twinge of pain some where, but I know that it is TMS and I don't let it consume my life. When I simply think psychololgical these little flare-ups go way almost immediately.

    Being recovered doesn't necessarily mean that we will never have TMS symptoms ever again. As long as we are alive our minds will be connected to our body, so we will always have some mind body reactions going on. The difference between being healed or not is that we recognize these symptoms as TMS and we eliminate the power they have over us. This really does lead to a sense that we regained our lives again. In my case, I no longer had to limit myself. I could walk as long as I wanted and could type (I had RSI in my wrists) as long as I wanted. There was nothing that limited me anymore, because I knew that I didn't have a structural problem and only needed to focus on the psychological components of the symptoms.

    When we are symptomatic, so much of our time and energy revolves around our symptoms. When we no longer have to worry about the symptoms, it really does feel like getting our live back!

    This really plays off of the question beforehand. TMS is a gift because if gives us the power to heal ourselves. One common experince TMSers have is seeing a whole bunch of doctors and having all of them say there is nothing they can do for you. To me this was the most disheartening part of my 18 years of being in pain. Learning about TMS gave me the knowledge to actively treat myself and recover. I didn't have to rely on an doctor or have surgery done. I only had to educate myself on what was going on and learn to think psychologically.

    There are also some positive aspects to the emotional work that is connected to recovering from TMS. I don't think a person has to journal to recover, but doing 4-6 months of journaling and emotional work will give a person a tremendous amount of introspection and personal growth.

    Lastly, TMS has allowed me to be part of this wonderful community and interact with so many great people. Meeting people who are going through similar experiences as myself has been very rewarding. If I never learned about TMS, I would never have thought about the TMS Wiki and would not have had the amazing opportunity to be part of such an amazing community of people.

    All in all learning about TMS has been a very empowering experience for myself. It has allowed me to growth personally and finally allowed me to take control over my treatment. While I would never wish anyone to have chronic pain for 18 years, I am very glad to be part of the TMS community.
    Livvygurl and veronica73 like this.
  3. Livvygurl

    Livvygurl Well known member

    Hi Forest,

    Thanks for your long and thoughtful reply and glad that you like the questions :) I agree believing and knowing about TMS gives one the ability to feel empowered and take control of the healing process through eduction and action. Speaking of education, I just came back from Half Price Books with a vintage Sarno circa 1982, Mind Over Back Pain. I believe this was his first book, I am looking forward to reading it to see the evolution of his theory. The theory that continues to change my life in wonderful ways!


    Livvy ~
  4. JanAtheCPA

    JanAtheCPA Beloved Grand Eagle

    Hi Livvy -

    I think that #1 can be answered in two ways:

    1. on the face of it, we are all over the map! Many people here have told us ghastly things about their childhoods and the horribly dysfunctional family dynamics they had to live with. Others of us had pretty good childhoods without anything other than the typical dysfunction of human beings trying to live together. And lots of different stories in between those two extremes.

    2. But if you look at it using Freud's theories, we all experienced the same thing, and, according to Dr. Sarno, it's our common personality traits that cause us to react with TMS.

    Many, if not most, of your questions are addressed in the self-study and journaling exercises in our Structured Educational Program, or in other self-help resources such as Dr. Shubiner's "Unlearn Your Pain". Actually, I think that the only one probably NOT addressed is the question about having lunch with Dr. Sarno, and that's a good one! I'll have to think about that.

    Livvygurl likes this.
  5. Livvygurl

    Livvygurl Well known member

    Hi Jan,

    Yes, psychological issues are commonly viewed as being a combination of environmental and genetic factors. The TMS personality type seems to be the genetic part, it was the environmental part that I was curious about. Of course, it is a very subjective question and sometimes people can be unaware of the pain from childhood because the experiences were too painful to hold in the conscious mind.

    I am looking forward to reading Dr. Shubiner's "Unlearn Your Pain", and will eventually try the journaling exercises :) Okay Jan, I am curious as to what you would ask Dr. Sarno if you won a free lunch and plane ticket to New York City. Feel free to be as creative as you wish to be!

  6. Beach-Girl

    Beach-Girl Well known member

    I agree Livvy that the genetic part could be a pre-dispostion to anxiety. And I've struggled with anxiety and pain for years, whereas my brother (who was protected by me) is just fine. He has little anxiety if any, and no pain. Interestingly, I recovered another memory during a nap yesterday from when I was 4. It was pretty traumatic and I'll write about it soon.

    Have to say that if I didn't have my sense of humor - I'd probably just give up. I love to laugh and make others laugh. It's been a nice way to hide the "true me" over the years.I'm learning to come out as the True Me and be serious instead of joking my way out of uncomfortable situations.

    Hmm Lunch with Dr. Sarno. I'd be so nervous I don't know what I'd ask. But I'll think on that one.

  7. Livvygurl

    Livvygurl Well known member

    BG and Gang,

    I have been opening the flood gates in my mind when I have free time and telling myself to just "feel whatever comes up". It is really intense but really great. Better to try this when you are alone or on the weekends ;) . I am in touch with the fact that society and my parents have conditioned me to act/feel certain ways at times. I stumbled across a very powerful (charged) feeling when I was writing about some of my childhood experiences of feeling deserted. I was emailing another member and BAM the emotion was revealed to its core! I was surprised to feel such a depth of emotion, it was a short stint. And it was RAGE!!! Pure unexpressed trapped feelings, YUCK! Perhaps I should go to a Primal Scream Therapist (very '70s). Anyhow, this is good news, better than being trapped in a stiff and sore body, I am slowly climbing out of the old patterns and venturing forth into the new, the unknown, and the excitment of the adventure...

    Livvygurl ~

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