Query about chronic nature of symptoms.

Over the last 7 years I have had huge issues with hypochondria which had gone hand in hand with a huge variety of 'symptoms'. Pretty much all of the symptoms fit the Somatoform Disorder criteria and I've come to see these as clear indications of physical anxiety/TMS.

I have had what I can't help but consider a separate issue of back and leg pain for about the last 5 years and whilst this is subject to pain flares and remission there is pretty much always a slight niggle there. I had an MRI on my back about 18 months ago and a small benign neuroma was discovered on my spine, this was actually reported upon as incidental firstly but when I pressed the issue it was suggested that the neuroma 'could' or 'possibly' may be responsible for the pain I was having but interestingly I don't have any loss of function or traditional nerve pain. My TMS therapist in the UK is convinced the neuroma is not responsible for the pain and believes it is a sensitised nerve system response in fitting with TMS/stress illness...he has actually sent my scans to Dr Hanscom to get his opinion in the hope this will convince me further.

So my query really relates to my main stumbling block with the TMS diagnosis as it relates to me. As mentioned I have had a huge number of symptoms over the last 7 years and these have been neurological, daily headaches, gastro etc etc and these symptoms seem to pop up and stay with me for a lengthy period but then tend to always diminish to be replaced by another symptom...this plays out like a totally classic symptom imperative and I'm totally on to it and can see the pattern. The problem is that with my back and leg pain is that it appears to be constant, it never goes totally really...yes, it does flare and there will be periods when I'm relatively pain free but the mild sensation of discomfort is ALWAYS there. It is interesting how the flares do not seem to have any rhyme or reason though...last Christmas was a disaster as I was in the most pain I have ever had with for the 3 days over christmas yet I haven't had a flare anything like it over the last year, for the last couple of days I have felt my back tightening and my leg starting to ache but I've sort of laughed this off as this was the built up to exactly the same thing last year. The neuroma was scanned again a couple of months back and it hadn't grown at all over the year and could well have been there all my life so a lot of this makes no sense at all.

I'm just wondering if anyone else has experienced this type of thing when they may have a wide variety of TMS type symptoms that go to be replaced with something else but have a longstanding symptom that stays with them be this back pain or whatever? Thanks for reading guys and any thoughts are grateful received.

 

Oh yes... I had chronic consistent pain in my neck and shoulders for 22 years - supposedly due to whiplash in a car crash. I then developed foot pain, sciatica, back pain, hair loss, hair growth, dry skin, dry eyes, sensitivity to light, to noise, to alcohol, to coffee, to sugar, then there was plantar fasciitis, reynauds syndrome, IBS, polycystic ovaries, thrombosis, panic attacks, irrational thoughts and a nervous breakdown!
All - I repeat ALL were due to TMS.
I spent two years working thru my TMS - using the Structured Educational Programme on TMS WIKI, Dr Sarno's and others books, meditation and journaling. I am now free of pain - occasionally the odd pain will flare - I address it as TMS and then ignore it - it goes! I am now working as a gardener and having a really physically challenging life - which would not of been possible before.
So , just plough on and do your TMS work, you will heal and yes, probably all your symptoms are TMS. Good luck.

 

Another point - when my Father-in-law wanted to give up smoking, his helpful wife added up what he was spending on cigarettes and then went out every 6 months and bought something for the same amount - something frivolous that bugged him. It was not too long before he found the will power to give up...
Perhaps add up the time you think about possible symptoms and the time spent having scans etc - and 'gift' yourself the equivalent time - to spend doing something pleasurable...

 

Thanks very much for taking the time to reply. Your comments about the 22 years long neck pain do give me some food for thought that the back pain could well be TMS.

I like your idea about adding the time up...what struck me though is that I can't actually think of anything pleasurable I would like to do with the time I have saved. That is probably the problem hey...

 

oh wow - that's your homework for today then! think long and hard until you find at least 3 things that you would consider pleasurable... it doesn't have to be bungy-jumping - it could be going to see a good film or taking an entire afternoon out to read a book, or buying yourself a posh cake from the patisserie... It's not hard to see where my pleasures lie!! what about you?

 

This gave me a little boost, 22 YEARs! and now pain free...absolutely amazing. what a travesty medicine has ignored this

 

Look at the thoughts that give rise to concerns about health and realize these are not valid. Ideas that we treat with confidence or seriously cause us to react and the reaction is not mental but physical. It is the result of various emotion and other reactions. I found that in many cases these are suggestions by other related parties, who are toxic. Their aim is to see you suffering to gain pleasure. You only need to recognize that the thoughts are perceptions of suggestions. They are null and void. Just discard them.

This commonly happens at holiday season because people are on holidays and have time to hassle others around them.
When you journal make a note of who you interact with and to whom you have given information about yourself or your movements. This will help you work out who is to be trusted and who is not to be trusted.

 

I've had so-called friends who rained my parades a lot. They seemed to enjoy making people miserable, like they were.
Misery may like company, but to me I try to be around positive people. Also, think happy and you will be happy.

 

There are some great vidoes on Youtube on how to be happy. Check them out!

 

I get what you guys are trying to say and I appreciate that there are some people who do get a kick out of making others unhappy and/or anxious but that isn't really the case here. It's most definitely an inside job.

 

wow 22 years of suffering.... thats a a tragedy .... i am so glad you are healed god bless you

 

we have to be careful, others do sometimes try to get us down to make themselves feel better, but also we 'mirror' stuff in others that we sometimes cannot face in ourselves. I have had to accept that there's STILL a 3 yr old tantrum-ass stuck inside me- which I have to distract now and again. Whisky works wonders...
wow - you know when you are being flippant - sometimes it is covering something up? I just realised I was 3 yrs old when I first downed a glass of whisky n soda (my parents were having a party and I was not supposed to be up) Did I down it cos all the people were acting happy and I wanted to be happy too - having often witnessed mega-fights and arguments between my parents.... As an adult I have used drink and drugs to cheer myself up and 'get out of my head' - how spooky!

 

I feel if we deal with what currently bothering us in the now not what happen years ago we seem to heal quicker

 

I agree...I certainly believe that in relation to my situation I generate tension and stress due to how I am in the moment rather than due to some internal and unresolved rage etc. Of course, I could be wrong and of course how I am in the moment could be because of these 'past issues' but I'm only commenting on how it feels to me. I really think that Monte Hueftle has got this aspect of stress illness nailed down.

 

When I first had a ruptured disc and back surgery over 20 years ago, I had constant back pain for 3-4 years. Sometimes it was less severe than at other times but it was always there to some degree. Then the pain moved up to the back of the right side of my head. My primary care physician diagnosed the head pain as occipital neuralgia and I started having physical therapy 3 times a week. I was often worried about having children and if I could handle it physically. When I got pregnant with my son 17 years ago, I had terrible morning sickness for the first 4 months and concern over my son's well being became my mental focus. By the time my son was born(four days after my father passed away unexpectedly) I had no more back pain. I would still get flare up of the occipital neuralgia, but my back was fine! Several years later I lugged two small children and a stroller up and down staircases and all over Paris, and not once did I have any back pain. What I did have was brain fog, chronic fatigue, anxiety attacks... About three years ago, during a career change and some other stresses(turning 50) the occipital neuralgia flared up in the worst way, and none of my usual therapies helped at all. In fact, they seemed to only make things worse. And I had Benign Positional Vertigo. My life was literally in a tale spin. I am convinced now, that all of it was TMS. It makes no sense to me that the back pain could have been so constant and debilitating for so many years and then just disappear. Most women complain of back pain when they are pregnant, and yet I had none. You did say your back pain at times is "relatively pain free but the mild sensation of discomfort is constant" Well, a mild sensation of discomfort is not too bad. I would try to get through the flare ups best you can and have confidence that it will return to mild sensation of discomfort. That sounds livable. The less thought and focus to you give to it, the better. Then at some point you may stop to reflect and realize that it is not even mildly discomforting any more. That is what has happened to me. I occasionally feel sensation or tightening in on the right side of my head/neck. I get a head ache on the right side of my head once and a while. That's okay. I know its TMS. I know the more I focus on my life and feelings, the more I take care of myself and don't beat myself up, the less likely it is to come.

 

I think it is understandable that you may now use something you found in your impressionable young years to have worked to make you feel happier.

What I hear you saying is that you feel, with some part of your personality, similar or same issues as you had as a child and you are reacting to them in the same way. I always see this type of occasion as an opportunity to discover what the issues are and who else may be involved. You can then address them as an adult would and not as a child, who is dependent and limited in how they can address issues, especially when those issues are created by parents.

I would embrace the child that you feel is part of your personality and not judge it for the reaction you feel but rather ask for what issues are there that is bothering it.

 

I explored lots of these 'parent-related' issues while I did all the work to recover from TMS. I found the most useful techniques that helped me 'get to the root ' of it was (in the Structured Ed' Prog) when you were asked to write a letter to a parent - with your non-dominant hand - this really got to the crux of my emotional problems particularly with my father. And then a meditational technique in Scott Brady's 'You Can Heal your Life' which was the key to releasing all the anger that I had kept inside. Now I always knew I had emotional problems from the way I was brought up - but despite being an educated and empathic person - I really did not know how much this impacted on my life and the way that I deal with people and situations as an adult. I have had tons of therapy over the years - which I thought had done me good - but in fact nothing had even scratched the surface. So the so-called fibromyalgia had been there to distract me... We all react and heal differently - and I wish that I hadn't had to delve quite so deep into the mire of my psyche... But for me it was the only way to heal. I had to sort out all the problems, all the sadness and anger and it took me bloomin' ages... I now can incorporate the child inside me and I understand my emotional and psychological reactions to events. I am kind to myself and others but I will not be pushed around or bullied. I am now a far better person for the journey - but I still keep an eye out for those little telling moments when another facet of me is revealed. Perhaps our tms work is never really finished - it is a lifetimes work...?