1. Alan has completed the new Pain Recovery Program. To read or share it, use this link: http://go.tmswiki.org/newprogram
    Dismiss Notice

Please help me my sciatica story feels so different then every one else’s

Discussion in 'General Discussion Subforum' started by moonman6, Mar 22, 2020.

  1. moonman6

    moonman6 Newcomer

    I’ve been reading this forum for months and finally decided to sign up so I can make this post. I really hope I get some answers. Here’s my story summarized the best I can. Please scroll down to the last paragraph for my main question if you don’t want to read my short story.


    7 years ago:
    I had mild tingling in my right leg that turned into full blown sciatica to where I couldn’t dress myself and was dragging my leg. I HAD ZERO OTHER SYMPTOMS AT THE TIME. My spine actually curved into the shape of a C to help compensate for the injury. I’m still till this day believe that injury was real and structural even though I believe in tms now.
    I had microdisectomy surgery and literally woke up pain free. My spine went back to normal and was pain free till 4 years later.


    3 years ago:
    I had a massive panic attack that landed me in the emergency room and thought I was dying. I ended up on the cycle of anxiety and was full blown with hundreds of symptoms I can’t even explain. I found out about Claire weeks and started getting better. Once I started getting better I hurt my back during yoga class. Ever since that yoga class my back has hurt non stop since. I just recently found out about dr. Sarno a few months ago and it made sense since I knew I was suffering from bizzare anxiety symptoms at the time.


    I’m starting to believe that the pain is structural and not tms anymore... which I know is bad. But I’ve been doing sooo good as far my anxiety and my symptoms are basically gone compared to how it was. But my sciatica pain has came back with a vengeance and I find myself limping around even though my anxiety symptoms are basically gone now. And it’s the exact same feeling I’ve had before surgery except not quite as bad. And when I look in the mirror my spine isn’t curved like it used to be.


    my main question:
    I’ve had microdisectomy surgery and even though I fully believe in tms I still believe my surgery was needed. I Know the mind can play tricks but the pain I was in was beyond anything that can be from tms. I couldn’t look down, sneeze, cough, sit, walk, and my sounds literally formed a C shape to compensate for the injury. But now I think my situation may be different and I’m actually suffering from tms now. I’ve had mris about 6 months ago that say I have a large herniation impinging one L5-S1 nerve root. What’s funny is when I got my mri I had no sciatica pain just back pain but now the pain is in my butt. How can I more forward with tms when I know I have a nerve being pinched?
     
  2. TG957

    TG957 Beloved Grand Eagle

    What I am going to say may sound brutal, but I feel that you need an honest opinion: this is a clear indication that you DO NOT believe in TMS, fully or partially. Every word of your post makes it clear to me that your symptoms are TMS. Why did I conclude so? Here it is:

    1. You are prone to severe anxiety. Anxiety is known to generate pain symptoms in people's minds
    2. You have had various symptoms and they were moving around your body
    3. Your most profound symptoms seem to present themselves one episode at a time
    4. Claire Weekes made a positive change at least once
    5. You feel that your sciatica story is different from those who succeeded
    6. Surgery could have been a placebo your mind wanted

    Why do I dare to speak with authority on this subject? Because I had suffered variety of symptoms, including severe issues with sciatica, lower and upper back pain etc. and I no longer have them, without any surgeries ever done on me. Also, I recovered from my last bout of TMS, which was CRPS (complex regional pain syndrome) which had very physical manifestations and no known cure other than denervation (when nerve is killed), continuous injections of botox or ketamine (essentially killing the nerve) or amputation of the effected limbs. No surgeries, no opioids, no botox or ketamine this time around either.

    I can also refer you to my other post, to save myself time on typing, where I describe what followed my recovery from previous conditions:

    https://www.tmswiki.org/forum/threads/tms-vs-getting-older.22642/#post-116900 (TMS vs getting older)

    I am not a superhuman, and if I did it, much like thousands of Sarno patients, you can do it, too. Best of luck and keep reading posts under Success Stories, that is the best medicine for TMS in my opinion!
     
  3. Miriam G. Bongiovanni

    Miriam G. Bongiovanni Peer Supporter

    Moonman6,

    Regardless of whether your past 'injury' was TMS or not, you have constantly been 'feeding' your brain with the idea that your pain is somehow structural, and this idea is still present in you today. You've gone through lots of procedures, and you could even have experienced the 'placebo' effect following a surgery, because you believed so much that it would work. Regardless of whether your past pain was 'structural' or not, I encourage you to start afresh.

    If you are considering the TMS method, then you need to believe 100% that your CURRENT pain is TMS. I fully agree with @TG957 that you still do not believe that your symptoms are 100% TMS. Unless you do, unfortunately there can be no progress, so start finding 'proof', and write a list of all the things that support the TMS diagnosis (for example, any personality traits that you've got that make you amenable to TMS, any instances of pain that do not make sense, etc).

    I've also had unbelievable sciatica pain which felt all too real and was all too physical (having TMS does not mean that your pain is just in your head). I could actually see my foot muscles contracting, and it was still TMS (refer to My Story for more details).

    Also, here I quote you:

    I’ve had mris about 6 months ago that say I have a large herniation impinging one L5-S1 nerve root. What’s funny is when I got my mri I had no sciatica pain just back pain but now the pain is in my butt. How can I more forward with tms when I know I have a nerve being pinched?

    You CAN MOVE FORWARD with TMS knowing that you have a pinched nerve because you will have to start believing that your pinched nerve IS MAY NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR YOUR PAIN, but is just a structural abnormality. Pain moving from one area to another is a very strong indication of TMS, which is something you should list down on your list of 'proof'. Also, according to Sarno, it's very unlikely to get prolonged pain from a pinched nerve, because that part of the nerve will 'die' and loose feeling if it keeps on being impinged on.

    I wish you luck on your journey, and please don't give up yet!

    Miriam

    (Holistic Life Coach and Mindbody Practitioner specialized in TMS Pain)
     
    TG957, JanAtheCPA and yb44 like this.
  4. yb44

    yb44 Beloved Grand Eagle

    I was given the same diagnosis and my pain was so bad I was bedridden, unable to move and when I absolutely had to, there was lots of screaming and crying. You story is not unique in the slightest. This is bog standard TMS.
     
    JanAtheCPA and TG957 like this.
  5. Bonnard

    Bonnard Peer Supporter

    I can really relate here.
    I was able to turn that around though into something that greatly helped me towards a solution.

    I've had pain where I couldn't work, where I could barely even walk, etc...
    When I consistently applied Sarno's suggested techniques, my symptoms went away. But, I still had some lingering fear that the pain was real/was structural.
    When debilitating pain would just simply disappear, or move to a different area of my body, I eventually realized that would be completely impossible if the symptoms were structural.

    For me, getting honest with myself and my symptoms and really paying attention and asking good questions of myself was key.
     
  6. TG957

    TG957 Beloved Grand Eagle

    This is a very good point. Being honest with oneself means accepting full responsibility for your own recovery. If we believe that the problem is structural, responsibility is on the doctor to find a magic pill. If it is psychological, the responsibility is on us. I remember how lost, disoriented and helpless I felt when I faced that realization. It was on me to figure out how to heal. But once I started healing, the sense of empowerment was exhilarating.
     
    Mars497@ likes this.
  7. JanAtheCPA

    JanAtheCPA Beloved Grand Eagle

    Hi @moonman6, and wowee! Your story has resonated with a bunch of our wonderful members who are more than happy to try and help you call bullshit on your primitive fearful brain.

    I don't think that I can begin to count how many times I've heard this - "but MY pain is different!" This is your brain on TMS - it's doing a great job convincing you of this, but it's BS. (@TG957, you know that I'm willing to be brutal as well)(but we wouldn't bother if we didn't care, right?)
    IMO, this is why people keep having surgery, because the short-term placebo effect is so powerful and impressive. Until it isn't. By which time it's too late to go back.
    And again ;)
    Well worth repeating.

    It's time to stop letting your primitive brain call the shots. You can take control, but it will take more will power than perhaps you can imagine. The resources we offer here are free and don't require any kind of commitment other than the one to do them consistently and with complete self-honesty - if you can do that, they will help you find the way.

    Good luck!
     
    TG957 likes this.

Share This Page