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Pelvic/Pudendal Strategies - Need Advice

Discussion in 'Support Subforum' started by sb_flyer, Dec 4, 2019.

  1. sb_flyer

    sb_flyer New Member

    For anyone on the forum with pudendal neuralgia issues that mostly present as nerve-like symptoms (skin tingling, burning, prickling, crawling, itching) through the various parts/components of the pelvic region, have you attacked this the same way other TMSers have treated more classic pain conditions? I ask because I have come to realize that I've had plenty of back/hip/neck pain issues in the past that in hindsight were TMS, but muscle pain and this 'pain' are so very different. I can actually handle my other pains and move forward without obsessing over them, but the nerve-like sensations in the pelvic, scrotum, genital areas is just so different for me. It's very mental and something I have trouble not obsessing over. I look for it the second I wake up and it is present throughout the day. Yes, when very busy and distracted, it fades, but it always seems to be lurking.

    Quick background...I've had these symptoms for 16 years. They were constant in the first 3-4 years, ebbed and flowed for many years to follow, and finally disappeared about 3-4 years ago. I'd get minor flares from time to time, but usually for no more than 2 days to a week. Now, I'm in week 6 of a horrible relapse and the symptoms and sensations are as bad as ever. I had a ton of stress and anxiety that precipitated this recent bout and I'm aware that nothing physical or structural happened or changed to cause the reappearance, but I'm finding I'm having a hard time not obsessing over the fear that this could be another 13 years of suffering - or longer.

    I've been working through Alan Gordon's program, I read Sarno (Healing Back Pain), I've been working through the Curable app, and have been meditating more, but nothing has seemed to help - at least not yet. I assume it's because I'm in this vicious fear cycle. My hope was that some - or one - of these tools would help me break that cycle. I know it's early and I'm certainly impatient. But, I'm also questioning how much my stress and anxiety is causing me to tense my pelvic floor and if I should be mindful of that physical tension contributing to all of this. Does that mean I'm not fully bought into this being TMS if I think the mind is creating physical tension that could be producing the symptoms?

    I know I'm a little all over the place in terms of my search for help/answers. I am certain this is TMS. Where I need help is some advice around whether I should go all in and do everything possible to try and get better or go the opposite route - that is simply accept that this is TMS, make sure I'm convinced about my outcome independence, and then not overdo the work with these various programs - i.e. just chill out and see what happens?

    Last edited: Dec 4, 2019
  2. Andy Bayliss

    Andy Bayliss TMS Coach & Beloved Grand Eagle

    Hi sb_flyer,

    The simple answer, if I understand your questions is that it is all TMS: the anxiety about your symptoms, and your life, the "physical tension," etc. There is no real "pure TMS." I advice you treat the thinking about causes, the efforts to fix the situation, and the symptoms as all of one piece. They are a result of inner tension which we all have.

    I think this is a good question. Each person finds their own way in this work. You read one person's approach, for instance "not worrying and trying to feel safe" and since it worked for them, you think "maybe that is the key!" Then you read the advise to "work hard, journal every day, don't give up."

    You have to experiment with different practices, all the while cultivating patience and confidence, with as much intuition as possible. What wants to be understood and seen in your life? In what ways do you act out your personality on yourself? What gives you ease, and what approach working with TMS might support this? These are some questions.

    It is OK that you may not completely buy into TMS 100%. When symptoms come, so do fears and doubts. This is natural. Acceptance cannot be obtained so much as absorbed, and it is easier to absorb if you're honest with yourself about your doubts. You're not doing anything wrong at this point. The confidence in TMS diagnosis takes its own time.


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