yarborough
New Member
hi, i have a question and hope maybe some of you can help me out.
i’m 33 and have been dealing with chronic headaches for almost five years now, which for the past few years i’ve felt pretty sure are TMS. it all started after my covid vaccination in may 2021. at first i had pretty normal side effects, like dizziness and a feverish feeling, but then it kind of turned into chronic headaches.
in the first months and years i did all the usual tests and workups: blood tests, different alternative medicine approaches, various off-label medications, and so on. after about a year and a half i came across TMS, and it honestly felt like it fit my situation perfectly, which was really reassuring. thankfully i never had to deal with fatigue. my symptoms have been there every day and are definitely very annoying and limiting, but i’ve also always had symptom-free hours, for example during exercise or sometimes while bathing. still, in five years i haven’t had a single completely symptom-free day.
after finding TMS, i read a lot of books and tried different coaches and programs. the approach that made the most sense to me was Dan Buglio’s, because it felt less like obsessing over meditation or strict routines and more like adopting the mindset that there is nothing to fix, that it’s okay, that you meet the pain without getting angry at it, and so on.
unfortunately, that and other things never really worked the way i hoped, and i keep wondering why, because compared to other people my symptoms don’t even seem that severe. i can work out, i’ve traveled, i’ve worked, so i’m doing a lot of things that should basically signal safety to my brain. i’m physically fit too. so i keep wondering why i can’t seem to get past these last 15 percent, or why i’ve basically been stuck on a plateau for five years.
at the same time, i’ve definitely noticed that my emotions play a huge role. when i’ve been sad, dealing with relationship problems, breakups, or a lot of stress, the symptoms got noticeably worse. so there clearly does seem to be some kind of trigger.
last year, after a very difficult breakup, i decided to step away from work for a few months to see whether that would help. i traveled and also started a psychosomatic rehab program. now all of that is over, and unfortunately i’m at a point where i’d say i actually feel a bit worse than i did five or six months ago, which feels really strange. even during rehab i had a lot of headaches, even though i didn’t really feel especially uncomfortable there.
and this is the main reason i’m posting now: i think i may have developed a new symptom. up until now it was mostly headaches, dizziness, body aches, a bit of tinnitus, and also this recurring pain at the injection site from the vaccine, which is one of the reasons i felt so convinced this had to be TMS.
but a few weeks ago, maybe five weeks ago, i noticed a slight weakness in my right hand while playing piano. i’ve played piano and guitar for almost my whole life, and i also work out, and i’ve never had problems like this before. at first i didn’t think much of it and just kept going, but there was still this uncomfortable feeling in my right hand.
then i came home from rehab and just continued life as usual, and i noticed the weakness seemed to get a bit stronger. i’ve also been doing regular workouts for about a year now. nothing extreme, just normal workouts, and i kept doing them during rehab too. the strange thing is that during rehab my headaches were worse, but i was doing less laptop work, and i’d say also a bit less guitar and piano than usual. i still worked out, but not hard, actually a bit less intensely than normal. so that was basically the time when this new symptom first showed up.
then after i got home, it got worse. work started again too, even with reduced hours, and i noticed i suddenly even had pain while typing, first on the right side and then slightly on the left too. my first thought was, shit, what is this now, RSI or something? then i read that RSI can also be TMS, which reassured me a bit. i stopped exercising for a week or two, but then thought that probably didn’t make much sense, so i just started working out again and tried not to give it too much attention.
at the same time, i was also under a lot of emotional stress. a lot came together at once: going back to work, emotional stress involving a woman, feeling overwhelmed, pressure, all of that. i really have to say that in the last two or three weeks i’ve been putting a huge amount of pressure on myself. so in that sense it would make sense that this symptom is showing up now.
on the other hand, over the last five years there were definitely other times when i put myself under a lot of pressure, including before i even knew about TMS, and it didn’t seem this bad back then.
so now i’m at a point where i honestly don’t know how to move forward. i’ve started reading some new books and am also trying Nicole Sachs’ journaling approach, because i’ve never really tried that before and i do feel like i have a lot inside me that probably needs to come out. so maybe that makes sense. i don’t notice any real change yet after three days of journaling, but at least i actually enjoy writing things out.
my question is mainly this, and i guess i’m mostly looking for some reassurance or maybe just your honest opinion on how to handle the hand symptoms. i feel like i can still work, but i really do notice weakness in my hands when playing guitar, playing piano, holding my phone, and even mild pain, also when playing basketball. i’ve still continued my workouts, but i keep wondering what actually makes sense here.
i’ve scheduled an appointment with an orthopedist just in case, although i’m not even sure what they’re really going to tell me. and part of me thinks it would be a pretty huge coincidence if i suddenly had pain in my right hand and forearm, and now even a bit in the left too, even though i haven’t dramatically increased my workouts, haven’t played more piano or guitar than usual, and if anything have done the same amount or even less pc work than usual.
is that enough to say this is TMS? because right now i honestly feel like there’s a 95 percent chance it is. and if that’s the case, should i still keep training, playing guitar, playing piano, even if it hurts? or what would you guys suggest?
i hope this makes sense and that maybe some of you can help me out. thanks a lot.
i’m 33 and have been dealing with chronic headaches for almost five years now, which for the past few years i’ve felt pretty sure are TMS. it all started after my covid vaccination in may 2021. at first i had pretty normal side effects, like dizziness and a feverish feeling, but then it kind of turned into chronic headaches.
in the first months and years i did all the usual tests and workups: blood tests, different alternative medicine approaches, various off-label medications, and so on. after about a year and a half i came across TMS, and it honestly felt like it fit my situation perfectly, which was really reassuring. thankfully i never had to deal with fatigue. my symptoms have been there every day and are definitely very annoying and limiting, but i’ve also always had symptom-free hours, for example during exercise or sometimes while bathing. still, in five years i haven’t had a single completely symptom-free day.
after finding TMS, i read a lot of books and tried different coaches and programs. the approach that made the most sense to me was Dan Buglio’s, because it felt less like obsessing over meditation or strict routines and more like adopting the mindset that there is nothing to fix, that it’s okay, that you meet the pain without getting angry at it, and so on.
unfortunately, that and other things never really worked the way i hoped, and i keep wondering why, because compared to other people my symptoms don’t even seem that severe. i can work out, i’ve traveled, i’ve worked, so i’m doing a lot of things that should basically signal safety to my brain. i’m physically fit too. so i keep wondering why i can’t seem to get past these last 15 percent, or why i’ve basically been stuck on a plateau for five years.
at the same time, i’ve definitely noticed that my emotions play a huge role. when i’ve been sad, dealing with relationship problems, breakups, or a lot of stress, the symptoms got noticeably worse. so there clearly does seem to be some kind of trigger.
last year, after a very difficult breakup, i decided to step away from work for a few months to see whether that would help. i traveled and also started a psychosomatic rehab program. now all of that is over, and unfortunately i’m at a point where i’d say i actually feel a bit worse than i did five or six months ago, which feels really strange. even during rehab i had a lot of headaches, even though i didn’t really feel especially uncomfortable there.
and this is the main reason i’m posting now: i think i may have developed a new symptom. up until now it was mostly headaches, dizziness, body aches, a bit of tinnitus, and also this recurring pain at the injection site from the vaccine, which is one of the reasons i felt so convinced this had to be TMS.
but a few weeks ago, maybe five weeks ago, i noticed a slight weakness in my right hand while playing piano. i’ve played piano and guitar for almost my whole life, and i also work out, and i’ve never had problems like this before. at first i didn’t think much of it and just kept going, but there was still this uncomfortable feeling in my right hand.
then i came home from rehab and just continued life as usual, and i noticed the weakness seemed to get a bit stronger. i’ve also been doing regular workouts for about a year now. nothing extreme, just normal workouts, and i kept doing them during rehab too. the strange thing is that during rehab my headaches were worse, but i was doing less laptop work, and i’d say also a bit less guitar and piano than usual. i still worked out, but not hard, actually a bit less intensely than normal. so that was basically the time when this new symptom first showed up.
then after i got home, it got worse. work started again too, even with reduced hours, and i noticed i suddenly even had pain while typing, first on the right side and then slightly on the left too. my first thought was, shit, what is this now, RSI or something? then i read that RSI can also be TMS, which reassured me a bit. i stopped exercising for a week or two, but then thought that probably didn’t make much sense, so i just started working out again and tried not to give it too much attention.
at the same time, i was also under a lot of emotional stress. a lot came together at once: going back to work, emotional stress involving a woman, feeling overwhelmed, pressure, all of that. i really have to say that in the last two or three weeks i’ve been putting a huge amount of pressure on myself. so in that sense it would make sense that this symptom is showing up now.
on the other hand, over the last five years there were definitely other times when i put myself under a lot of pressure, including before i even knew about TMS, and it didn’t seem this bad back then.
so now i’m at a point where i honestly don’t know how to move forward. i’ve started reading some new books and am also trying Nicole Sachs’ journaling approach, because i’ve never really tried that before and i do feel like i have a lot inside me that probably needs to come out. so maybe that makes sense. i don’t notice any real change yet after three days of journaling, but at least i actually enjoy writing things out.
my question is mainly this, and i guess i’m mostly looking for some reassurance or maybe just your honest opinion on how to handle the hand symptoms. i feel like i can still work, but i really do notice weakness in my hands when playing guitar, playing piano, holding my phone, and even mild pain, also when playing basketball. i’ve still continued my workouts, but i keep wondering what actually makes sense here.
i’ve scheduled an appointment with an orthopedist just in case, although i’m not even sure what they’re really going to tell me. and part of me thinks it would be a pretty huge coincidence if i suddenly had pain in my right hand and forearm, and now even a bit in the left too, even though i haven’t dramatically increased my workouts, haven’t played more piano or guitar than usual, and if anything have done the same amount or even less pc work than usual.
is that enough to say this is TMS? because right now i honestly feel like there’s a 95 percent chance it is. and if that’s the case, should i still keep training, playing guitar, playing piano, even if it hurts? or what would you guys suggest?
i hope this makes sense and that maybe some of you can help me out. thanks a lot.
