• Alan has completed the new Pain Recovery Program. To read or share it, use this updated link: https://www.tmswiki.org/forum/painrecovery/
  • Welcome to the new TMS Wiki server! Things aren't finished yet: email is not set up, so notification and password-reset emails don't go out, and new registrations are paused until email is installed. Details and updates are in this thread (click here). Locked out? Email tmswikisignups@gmail.com from the address where you receive TMS Wiki notifications.

New member (lynn)

L

LEW

Peer Supporter
Hi Everyone,
I just joined this wiki and am so happy to be part of this. I have had TMS for about a year and a half and am really struggling with recovery. I have a TMS therapist that I'm working with and a regular therapist. One says get angry, the other says don't. What have you all found to work best. Also is there a support group in Boston. Would love to join. Thanks. Lynn
 
Hi Lynn. Sorry you are getting conflicting information and direction. I am curious why the one therapist would say don't get angry. Definitely, get angry! You don't need to get violent or take it out on anyone. You can write like crazy and hit the page with all your angry energy. Or you can just go to town fantasizing what you might do if you really let that anger out. That's where you can get violent! The truly important thing is to recognize when you are angry and to allow yourself to feel it. This took a lot of practice for me. I liked to talk myself out of it, rationalize how useless and unproductive it was. I would try real hard to understand the other person's perspective and not give myself permission to be angry. I was perpetually nice to everyone but myself! Sometimes if you find you have difficulty feeling and expressing anger, its a very good idea to learn how to recognize your internal bully. Often we take the anger out on ourselves because we learned somewhere along the line that it is not safe to feel angry with others. And being angry at yourself does not count! Now I am much better at knowing when I am angry and just feeling it. You don't have to change anything or fix anything. Just let yourself feel it.
 
Hi, Lynn. I like Anne's advice. I get angry at my computer and it causes me to have headaches.
I swear a blue streak at my computer when it loses things I've written or does other crazy things.
I find it helps to get angry and yell at it. I just have to be careful I don't throw it on the floor because
I need it. I'm a full-time freelance writer of books and am on the keyboard every day for hours.
 
Anne Walker said:
Hi Lynn. Sorry you are getting conflicting information and direction. I am curious why the one therapist would say don't get angry. Definitely, get angry! You don't need to get violent or take it out on anyone. You can write like crazy and hit the page with all your angry energy. Or you can just go to town fantasizing what you might do if you really let that anger out. That's where you can get violent! The truly important thing is to recognize when you are angry and to allow yourself to feel it. This took a lot of practice for me. I liked to talk myself out of it, rationalize how useless and unproductive it was. I would try real hard to understand the other person's perspective and not give myself permission to be angry. I was perpetually nice to everyone but myself! Sometimes if you find you have difficulty feeling and expressing anger, its a very good idea to learn how to recognize your internal bully. Often we take the anger out on ourselves because we learned somewhere along the line that it is not safe to feel angry with others. And being angry at yourself does not count! Now I am much better at knowing when I am angry and just feeling it. You don't have to change anything or fix anything. Just let yourself feel it.
Click to expand...

Wow Anne. This is really helpful. I am working on trying to figure out when I'm angry. I too have been cued to not get angry which doesn't help. I know this is a process and I will be patient with the process. Knowing everyone is here for constant encouragement is so great. Thanks for your guidance. My maiden name is Walker by the way. Ha. Lynn
 
Lynn Levy said:
...I too have been cued to not get angry which doesn't help.
Click to expand...

↑
"... I have a TMS therapist that I'm working with and a regular therapist. One says get angry, the other says don't."


Which says what? As they say on the outside of the junk mail envelopes, "A favor of a reply would be appreciated."

Thanks,
tt/lsmft

"...there are so many things little and big that are tms, I wouldn't have time to write about all of them" Dr. Sarno
 
In the same boat TT, that why got rid of tms therapist I like regular therapist instead.

I feel the tms does reach deep emotions but going deep really as not caused me much relief
 
I would not say either I have been stuck in my progress ...I am leaving with my wife which we are still talking about divorce so this well of rage his stopping me from true healing but with that said I have made peace with my living situation
 
Maybe if you stuck with your TMS therapist you may be making progress instead of being stuck. What didn't you like about your TMS therapist?
 
TT you can say maybe or I should of for everything...but at $150 a session times ,10 sessions my progress was min, I like her just fine she was terrific but I guess she brought me as far as I could go.

I felt by reading and journaling is as effective and with the occasional unbias opinion to talk to a couple times a month I am a bit further.

The are many people worse of them me that are finding success without tms therapist. At times I feel like to go back but until health ins picks this up I can't not afford to be spending $600 a month
 
Thanks for the feedback Marco, you probably need to resolve your marital issues to lower your TMS reservoir. I just experienced a break-up of a long term relationship and can feel my TMS stress levels lowering appreciably.

G'luck!
tt
 
Lynn Levy said:
Hi Everyone,
I just joined this wiki and am so happy to be part of this. I have had TMS for about a year and a half and am really struggling with recovery. I have a TMS therapist that I'm working with and a regular therapist. One says get angry, the other says don't. What have you all found to work best. Also is there a support group in Boston. Would love to join. Thanks. Lynn
Click to expand...
 
I'm a psychotherapist in the Boston area, and I have recognized that I have TMS. I think there are different theory bases. I think it would be hard to have two psychotherapists simultaneously. There needs to be, I think, some coordination between them. I think with all therapies you need to find what resonates with you.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top