Mindfulness meditation is an excellent way to cope with the information overload we experience these days as well as the constant mind chatter we all experience. So many of my patients tell me they don’t know how to meditate, or say they just ‘can’t do it’, so this blog explains how meditation can be so helpful, while also providing you off with a ‘quick start’ guide to mindfulness meditation.
Our minds are constantly bombarded with information from radio, television and computers as well as all the other distractions we have in our lives. If we never take time out to allow our brains to ‘defuse’, how can we be expected to process all this information and cope with it all without feeling overwhelmed? The other problem with never taking time out from the constant demands and distractions in our lives is that when we do face controversy, confrontation or upset of some sort, we tend to bottle up how it makes us feel in order to be able to get on with whatever is next in line for us that day.
This is a typical cause of the stress we experience these days and when you realise that ‘stress’ is actually not just the actual ‘stressor’ itself, but how we respond to it, you can see how our perception and therefore our response, will be completely different depending on how we actually feel inside.
Another form of stress is self induced, created by our constant mind chatter, although most of us don’t even realise how much stress this is causing us because it is so normal for us. This is where our learned behaviours, beliefs and attitudes play a part, with our mind chatter reinforcing these constantly to us. For example, if you have a habit of being self critical and a perfectionist, then your mind chatter will play away in the background creating inner turmoil as you ruminate over an issue you don’t feel you did it well enough.
Unfortunately most people don’t recognise that we do actually have a choice in how we speak to ourselves, even though it isn’t necessarily going to be easy to make these changes, especially in the early stages. However, once you notice how you speak to yourself you will recognise how often this mind chatter is negative, unhelpful and more often than not inaccurate based on past experiences.
Taking time each day to be mindful and to meditate can be so helpful in allowing your mind to quieten down and process everything that has happened, which then helps you to feel more calm and therefore more able to respond, rather than react, to what happens in your life.
The main thing about mindfulness meditation is to become intentionally aware of each moment and to be completely non judgmental of yourself and your thoughts. Even Mindfulness Meditation Masters still have thoughts that flit through their mind, but the main aim is to just notice them as just thoughts, let them go and not get caught up in them. Below are a few tips to help you make a start on learning to meditate mindfully.
1) Find somewhere quiet, warm and comfortable to sit. You can lie down, but it is more likely you will fall asleep then rather than meditate.
2) Often having a specific place and even a regular time to meditate can be helpful . This is because you develop an association between this place and time and being still, which can help you settle into meditation more easily.
3) You might want to sit in a comfy chair, or cross legged on a cushion on the floor, but try to sit upright if you can so you will remain relaxed, but not so much that you fall asleep.
4) To begin with you might want to take two or three slow deep breaths which trigger your parasympathetic system into going into relaxing the body.
5) In order to become more relaxed you might also find it helpful to slowly scan each part of your body and relax each area before moving on.
6) If you have pain, resistance towards it or frustration, actually creates more inner turmoil that also then fuels the pain. Take note of any discomfort for a moment and be compassionate towards it, allowing it to be there without judgement and then move on down the body.
7) Throughout this breath gently, through your nose if you can because then you are less likely to hyperventilate. Breath at whatever speed and depth feels right for you and you will probably find that as you relax your breathing will become slower and less deep. It is important to go with what feels right though and not try to adjust your breathing to what you feel you ought to be doing.
8) Once you feel relaxed, sit quietly and focus only on where the breath is going in and out at the tip of your nose.
9) If you find your thoughts wander, just notice them without becoming caught up in them in any way, then let them go and take your attention back to your nose again. Repeat this as often as you need to without cause for concern.
10) Don’t judge how well you have done! Be kind to yourself and recognise that even just by sitting down without any distraction for 10 – 15 minutes will have provided you with an opportunity to ‘defuse’.
You will find that with practice it does get easier to be still for longer and to let go of your thoughts more easily. In fact if you do struggle with being able to calm your thoughts at all, it can be helpful to offload onto paper beforehand. This is called ‘Stream of Consciousness’ journaling and is a great way to get your thoughts out of your head and onto paper. It is often much easier to quieten the mind after ‘emptying your head’ of any worries, decisions etc. It is also much more likely that after doing this and then meditating, your intuition will come up with ideas, solutions etc to whatever was on your mind.
Why not do this daily for a month and see how you get on? I can guarantee that by then you will probably try and keep that space in your day free to continue because of the benefits you will have noticed. In fact even your family and friends might comment on the change in you too!
