Ignoring the Pain

So as I journey into Day #10 of the SEP, I noticed over the last 3 days that my pain is getting worse especially after physical activity.

Sarno says to think about emotions and what's causing the pain. Even though I am doing that, I still find myself "checking in" on the pain 100 times a day! The very thing I need to avoid!!

Any advice, I am journaling a good bit and it's helpful. But the pain will stay if I get scared. After all that's what got me here.

 

Hi Susan,

My pain always seems to get worse with physical activity too, and I monitor it often as it's pretty hard to ignore. I am on Day 16 of the SEP, so I know it is still early days, but each time there is a little voice wondering, maybe there really is a structural problem (I am about as classic a TMS case as anyone could find). Sometime in the last week I read a post where someone said when they checked in with the pain they acknowledged it as a signal to think psychological. This is wildly paraphrased, I might not have it right, but it seems useful enough I will try it.

AS for the pain talk idea, I'm not that good at it. Enough people yelled at me in childhood that frankly I'm not that happy yelling at any part of my consciousness. I admit I may have to just do it if it's necessary, and it seems to work for many people. Since yesterday I've tried instead saying to my subconscious, "Up until now you have been doing a good job of helping me avoid my emotions because I couldn't handle them. Now things are different-- I am in a loving situation, I have many tools, a good forum, good friends, etc, so now I want you to stop doing the pain thing and instead help me get more in touch with the troublesome emotions." So my mantra is Stop the pain, Allow the feelings. We'll see how I go!

 

Hi Terry:
Thanks! I like the mantra, I am on Day #11 of SEP and it's been up and down. I am getting back to doing things I enjoy andI am a lot better at ignoring the pain, but like you said, sometimes it's so hard. And for me, there are so many emotions, mainly anger that I need to work through.

I do like the talk the you are doing to your unconscious. Just being kind to yourself instead of battling and fighting which is necessary at times.

There is so much coming up from my past I've now developed insomnia, which scares me to death, because I know I need to sleep to heal.

Probably another TMS symptom.

You will heal!!! You are doing all the right things!

Susan

 

I think Dr. Sarno says if physical activity is painful don't do it until pain goes away for a few days or a week.

I walk and drive to go shopping and can bend down to pick up my dog's poop, but no exercise. Yet.

Sometimes when I do pain talk my subconscious takes the pain away but not always.
I've told it I feel angry, enraged, guilty, etc. about more things than I ever thought I could discover.
What the tarnation more does it want from my tired head?

Sarno says thinking about all the causes of our TSM is not unhealthy and in fact is good for us, so
we don't suppress it. But I think we need to balance that with anything positive. Hard to do when it's
a gloomy rainy dark Sunday.

 

Explorer, what book is the SEP plan in? What doe SEP stand for?

I'm in day 11 of Dr. Scott Brady's plan in his book PAIN FREE FOR LIFE. It's a 3-step plan and the first two steps are easy but the third, about journaling, is very complicated. I'm a college graduate and not sure I'm following it as he says to. He bounces around a lot in the journaling section and it's hard to keep track of it all.

Dr. Sarno in HEAING BACK PAIN and THE MIND-BODY PRESCRIPTION there no definite step by step plan.
I've ordered Steve Ozanich's THE GREAT PAIN DECEPTION and wonder if there is a definite step by step plan in it.

I just thought of it, but rainy, damp days can cause pain even without TSM.

 

Hi Walt:

The Structured Educational Program is on this site. Just go on the Wiki home page and you will see it.

I am trying to do one plan at a time as not to dilute the solution.

As far as the physical exercise is concerned I was fine until yesterday. The pain either stayed the same or got better. I think I have to get back to the repression and emotions. I also have a work trip coming up which could be causing me issues and I don't even know it.

And yes, rainy damp days make me sad. The pain is even worse on those days.... The good news is that you have all sunny days ahead of you, painfree and happy!

 

I didn't know about SEP being on Wiki. LOL. I'll take a look but agree with you... one plan at a time.

I just took my dog for a walk and had pain but my subconscious didn't want me to talk to it.
I've read that when pain increases it could mean the subconscious in closer to giving up on using pain on us.
I'll grab at that straw.

Yes, the upcoming work trip could bring on more stress. Maybe you can do something on the trip to make it more pleasant.

 

Enjoy walking your dog, Walt. I know you enjoy that. And maybe that's what it is, the unconsious getting ready to peter out on me. That just what I need.

 

I just watched the video interview radio host Janette Barber has with Steve Ozanich about his new book THE GREAT PAIN DECEPTION and it's terrific. Find it at the right side of the TSMwiki home page.

He says when our subconscious moves our pain around to other parts of the body it means we're winning. My back and side pain usually is on my left side but sometimes moves to my right side.

 

Walt:
I ordered Steve's book, hope to get it soon. I have heard wonderful things about it. And my pain is also moving around. The back of my legs used to hurt/burn and now the top is. It's very strange. I think TMS is on the run.

I have a lot of work to do. Staying postive is really important. Steve reminded me not to fight the pain and anger it just go with it. That's what I am going to work on this week. Just letting it okay and working TMS. Sometimes it's a fight to stay positive when one is in pain. But those who have healed have......

 

Yes, it's hard to follow Steve's advice and not to fight the pain and just go with it.

Sarno's philosophy is so simple...Just BELIEVE our subconscious causes the pain to distract us from thinking about causes of our anger, guilt, etc.

We don't have to delve into our past or present to learn what the causes are. But I'm doing that so I can tell my subconscious what they are.

 

There is a thread in the Discussion Forum about Fear of Walking, which I found helpful about this problem. It also includes some helpful insights on journaling. 'This link should get you there, or else try the search box in Forums.

http://tmswiki.wetpaint.com/thread/3307067/Fear+of+walking

I not only went walking yesterday, I took off running. It was a beautiful day and felt right to do. Of course later, I thought uh oh, what have I done. But this morning I am in no more or less pain than usual, so I am pretty encouraged. I know though that if it had been worse (perhaps from some stressor, or the subconscious turning up the heat), I would be thinking for sure it was the running. I am slowly learning to remember to always think psychological.

 

Hi Terry:

This post hit the spot. I couldn't get to the link and will try later. Kuddos to you for breaking into a run. I used to run and really loved it. I will get back into it again.

As for fear of walking my nerve pain has spread to my calves and I was worried about walking just today. I am also getting pain in the top of my feet so when I actually do go for a walk it now hurts my feet.

The pain is moving around and getting worse in some spots so I know I've to the unconsious on the run. I am also trying to live one day at a time. Which is really hard for us TMS'ers.

Again, kudos to you! Awesome you are making progress!

 

Steve Ozanich's suggestion for ignoring pain makes a lot of sense to me:
Ignore the pain by focusing instead on any of the psychological causes of our TMS:
anger, rage, guilt, perfectionism, etc.

I do also like yelling at my pain, but after a few yells, I'm now trying to follow Steve's advice.
That way the subconscious may get the message I want to send it: Sending the pain is no longer
going to work with me. I have an arsenal of causes of anger, etc. to focus on.
Never realized how many until I began journaling.

 

I'm in the midst of reading STeven's book and I LOVE IT...but I haven't yet gotten to the part where he makes suggestions on how to heal. The strength he shows in his own personal story gives me motivation on my hard days.

 

I ordered Steve's book and will get it in a few days. I think I'd go right to the part about how to heal the pain,
but think I already know it... don't focus on the pain but on the reasons for repressed emotions. Anger for what someone did
to me long ago. Sometimes it works for me and I don't
feel the pain, but not always.

 

If this is any consolation to you, Explorer, I began the SEP 5-months back (and read Sarno 3 years ago) and it was only last night, when I took a 3 miles hike on the Nature Preserve, that I didn't have any pain and also started walking real fast like I used to when I was "normal" (pre-TMS relapse in 2007-008). So . . . Rome wasn't built in a day. TMS doesn't vanish in the twinkling of an eye. I did notice that I went walking last night when I hadn't intended to do so. I was going to take a bike ride, but it got dark. Seems as though I snuck up on the hike without any preconceptions about improvement and was surprised when I went fast without pain (outcome indepence?). Tricky business, sneaking up on a somatized neurosis when you're not thinking about it and monitoring it.

 

Walt - I felt a lot of anger and rage today during my theraphy session. There was a lot of built up stuff there. Today was a hard day ignoring the pain because it moved to my hands which scared the heck out of me.

Lala - The Structured Education Program is on this wiki. It's the one I've been doing. Talk about what' in my journal to my therapist is very helpful. Journaling has been hard.

MorComm - I hear ya! The hardest thing for me to do is accept that this is a process and be patient. That's not my greatest virtue. I cry a lot when new pain arrives and start the fear pain cycle all over again. It's great to hear that you are hiking and walking w/o pain. I took my daughter to the mall for her Homecoming dress and shoes and only once though about the pain. It keep moving all around. Kinda crazy.....

 

Sounds like me 3 months ago. As hard as I tried to tell myself it was an illusion, my lower lumbar pain and sciatica continued to come back after various pain-free windows raised my expectation levels. However, if it's any consolation to you, I notice with each pain-free episode followed by a pain relapse that the overall cycle has been running down, like my TMS is running out of energy. It's like my mind can't be bothered to keep it going. I have noticed these past two weeks that I've been what I term "lazy" - not pushing to achieve every waking moment. Hope you can do the same!

 

Excellent news since I am only two weeks into the program. I have nerve pain in both my legs and arms. Did you have that as well. I have to discipline my mind. It's very hard after thinking my life was over due to fibro. I am a classic TMS person. Perfectionist, Goodist all whole deal.

Today is day 3 with hightening symptoms. I keep reminding my pain that I don't need it anymore I addressing the hard issues. And I really am....