I just took a shower

Mani

Mani

Well known member
I washed my hair for the first time in a year. The people here must know how it feels to involuntarily be the grossest person ever. I havent taken a shower in more than a year. Obviously ive tried to bathe but it was always a disaster and just terrible.

It feels so dehumanizing to not be able to wash properly. This is one of the things with tms that this forum tends to gloss over. Being a gross individual makes me not wanna be amongst people in the first place, which is a huge tms problem.

I dont know man i just wanted to share this. I dont know when ill be able to do this again but i need to celebrate not having gross dirty dandruff hair for the first time in forever.

Have a nice weekend all. I dont know if Ive addressed this but its Lent so I’d like to wish everyone the best of luck in the upcoming weeks. Holy Week is right around the corner Spring is coming and the sun is starting to wake up

Cheers <3
 
Congrats! You should feel super proud. It's a milestone moment. I'd also like to think that if you did this now, you'll be able to do it again...maybe sooner rather than later!
I've also been dealing with being inside and not getting out much in the last couple of months. Not the same as your situation for sure, but I can relate a little bit. Finally got the courage to get out and get a haircut last weekend that I'd been putting off for weeks and weeks.

We are celebrating Lent and Holy Week as well. So blessings to you and anyone else who partakes.
 
Mani said:
I washed my hair for the first time in a year. The people here must know how it feels to involuntarily be the grossest person ever. I havent taken a shower in more than a year. Obviously ive tried to bathe but it was always a disaster and just terrible.

It feels so dehumanizing to not be able to wash properly. This is one of the things with tms that this forum tends to gloss over. Being a gross individual makes me not wanna be amongst people in the first place, which is a huge tms problem.

I dont know man i just wanted to share this. I dont know when ill be able to do this again but i need to celebrate not having gross dirty dandruff hair for the first time in forever.

Have a nice weekend all. I dont know if Ive addressed this but its Lent so I’d like to wish everyone the best of luck in the upcoming weeks. Holy Week is right around the corner Spring is coming and the sun is starting to wake up

Cheers <3
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Sounds like quite the relief! I definitely take washing for granted - it must feel so good after all this time! :)
 
Scott G said:
Finally got the courage to get out and get a haircut last weekend that I'd been putting off for weeks and weeks.
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As you can imagine i also havent been to the barber in roughly 2 years. Thus far I havent taken any length off myself. I need to put it in a man bun. I really want to get my hair cut but I have to be patient.
Scott G said:
Not the same as your situation for sure, but I can relate a little bit.
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Oh yeah I’m sure you most definitely can. There’s no point in comparing, arguing whos got it the worst. Were all going through the same process of fear and healing.

Adam Coloretti (coach) said:
it must feel so good after all this time!
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Kinda. The showering itself is a little scary still to be honest. To be clean does feel amazing, although its still not relieving. I mean, if i dont shower for a week ill be gross again. I struggle with acknowledging success — another part of the Tms puzzle
 
Mani said:
To be clean does feel amazing, although its still not relieving. I mean, if i dont shower for a week ill be gross again.
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At my worst, I couldn’t shower or take a bath for many months. It’s amazing how clean you can actually keep yourself with a simple flannel (washcloth) wash. I found it’s a good way to baby step your way toward being able to shower again — or to manage between showers — especially if standing is difficult due to pain or fatigue (though I appreciate that the latter probably doesn't apply in your particular case, but the same principle applies... and that is to take things in baby steps to go 'under the radar' and not alarm the brain — no 'all or nothing' thinking).
Mani said:
I struggle with acknowledging success
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You’ve already acknowledged your success by posting about having a shower — that in itself shows awareness and true progress. What you seem to be finding harder is celebrating it, and/or seeing it as the beacon of hope it really is — it's proof that you will be able to do it regularly again!
 
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That’s amazing! You should really feel proud of yourself. I was thinking that to keep the momentum going, it might be fun to treat yourself to some cool, maybe even a little bougie new shampoos, conditioners, or body washes. It’s amazing how much of a difference those little things can make. I know for me, those things make me feel excited to pamper myself. Makes me feel like a million bucks.
 
BloodMoon said:
You’ve already acknowledged your success by posting about having a shower — that in itself shows awareness and true progress. What you seem to be finding harder is celebrating it, and/or seeing it as the beacon of hope it really is — it's proof that you will be able to do it regularly again
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very well put, youre right on. I struggle with celebrating anything i do or have done.
 
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