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Day 9 How It's Going

tag24

tag24

Peer Supporter
(For context, the SEP tells people to post about how treatment's going so far on this day.)

It's been going OK so far. I've been doing the work, engaging with the journalling... it's been emotional, and tiring. I'm really sleepy after finishing that last letter to be honest, which I think is another way the body tries to protect us from what's in the mind. But I'm getting through it. I'm struggling to think of a lot of people that I have stressing me tbh, most of my stress is internal and self-directed/societally driven? So might need to adjust some prompts accordingly to fit that.

Symptom-wise, it's been rough. Last night, I suddenly developed new pain/areas of effect with my issue, and they haven't gone even through the night. I panicked about it for a while, fell into cyberchondria Googling again... I managed to pull myself out, eventually, but it was a dark time and I still feel quite afraid. I believe I have emotional work I need to do, and I'm happy to commit to the program where that's concerned, but I still find myself doubting it's TMS, even though:
  • It onset in a period of high stress.
  • It's only gotten worse in the last 3 or so weeks AFTER I began to fixate on it as it was.
  • It got way worse yesterday after an emergency life stressor came up.
There's definitely mindbody involvement here, it's obvious. And stories from people like Dorado, TG957 and Miffybunny incl. symptoms like mine and they all had improvement/cure from mindbody practices... but the seed of doubt is hard to shake. I'm afraid I'll never get better. I hope that I will.
 
Hello. How are you now. I am 3 weeks in and just feel worst. I am walking alot and doing all the things, journal and meditation. My nerve and burning pain has spread from face to ribs and sleeping is so hard and woke me up at 3am. I am also inspired by those stories and keep pushing on but I am struggling at the moment. If I could see one change that would be so helpful but its going the other way still .
 
Bex1111 said:
Hello. How are you now. I am 3 weeks in and just feel worst. I am walking alot and doing all the things, journal and meditation. My nerve and burning pain has spread from face to ribs and sleeping is so hard and woke me up at 3am. I am also inspired by those stories and keep pushing on but I am struggling at the moment. If I could see one change that would be so helpful but its going the other way still .
Click to expand...

Hey there! I'm still working on it, I'm no worse but no majorly better BESIDES in how preoccupied I am with all this, I've started to care a lot less about the symptoms. You could be in the grip of symptom imperative/extinction burst so don't worry, this will pass as well - I'm not really in the position to give good advice about it but please, keep doing the work. If NOTHING else, gaining awareness and compassion for your anxiety and fear about this will help you to cope, and I promise that as you become less fearful, you will not feel as consumed by this as you do now.
 
Thank you and all the best to you also. Yes it seems that SI is what's occurring which can cause some more anxiety to pop up. This morning and last night sleep was difficult due to symptoms waking me no matter how many times I had told my brain we were going to sleep well . I can feel my nervous system shake internally too alot and I feel like there is an internal fight almost. Still learning how to manage it all and thank you again for you advice. Best wishes Becky.
 
Bex1111 said:
. I can feel my nervous system shake internally too alot and I feel like there is an internal fight almost.
Click to expand...
I saw this in one of your other posts as well, and I have certainly experienced this, which I think of as jitteriness.

My best coping mechanism is to acknowledge it and let it go as simply a symptom of what you are accurately describing as an internal conflict. And, as I think I said in another post, I always have faith that it will pass, which it always does, always without any awareness of when it stops.

In other words, I think it's important to acknowledge the symptom, rather than trying to ignore (aka repress) it. Then, make a mindful decision to treat the symptom as having no significance to your physical well-being - rather, always see it as a sign of an emotional conflict.

The next step is to examine the source of the emotional conflict. It might be important, or it might be a response to something rather minor (like a personal interaction that didn't go well or maybe even something you saw or heard like a news item). You never know what our brains think is important to repress!
 
Yes its a very interesting symptom when I just observe it. I have had it many times throughout my life( shows how often I have been unconsciously in conflict) , but these last 3 weeks I have felt it often , especially at night and the mornings . I am taking that as a good sign that change is happening.
 
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