Daniel L. How do I overcome pain fighting back?

This question was submitted via our Ask a TMS Therapist program. To submit your question, click here.

Question

I am 52 years old; a 4 year survivor from Stage IV Cervical cancer; my divorce was finalized in the Spring of 2012; my sister succumbed to metastatic breast cancer in the Fall of 2012; my mother (age 80) is currently undergoing chemotherapy treatments; we survived Super Storm Sandy also in the Fall of 2012; I share custody of our 3 teenage children - the oldest is heading off to college this Fall! I have TMS. I have no doubt about it. I have a TMS trained physician - Dr. Paul Gwozdz - who was himself a patient of Dr. Sarno. I've read each of Dr. Sarno's books (and of course, saw myself on every page!) I'm now devouring Steven Ozanich's "The Great Pain Deception" - quite possibly the most concise work on the mind-body connection. My pain emanates from my hips and pelvic region. It travels down both legs, to my knees, calfs and ankles. I depend on a cane to walk. I'm exhausted. I'm embarrassed and self-conscience. But today I did something good for myself - I attended a water exercise program at my local YMCA! The problem - I am crippled in pain, more intense than anything before! Bouts like this set me back - WHY is my body fighting me so hard? I'm in bed crying and trying to get comfortable. Even throughout the class, I was trying to VISUALIZE the blood and oxygen flowing down through my hips and legs - but all I'm left with is stiffness and PAIN!

 

Answer

Wow – you have a lot of potentially stressful situations in your life. Take a moment and be proud of yourself for weathering those things as well as you have. Seriously.

Okay, first of all: your body is not fighting you. I know it feels that way, but your body is actually sending you a message that something needs to slow down.

If you conceptualize your body as fighting you, then you’re setting yourself up for a battle. When you get ready for battle, your body goes into a state of anxiousness/excitement (the fight part of fight or flight). So take a deep breath, and remind yourself that your body isn’t trying to fight you.

Secondly, I want you to take it slowly. You may have bitten off more than you can chew by going to the water exercise class. Perhaps just a few minutes in the water will keep your Autonomic Nervous System from overreacting. As it happened this particular time, your ANS went into overdrive because the class was (either consciously or unconsciously) terrifying. You have to ease into these kinds of new situations to help out your nervous system.

What do I mean by that? Think of your nervous system like a muscle. If you haven’t worked out for weeks, months, or even years, then you wouldn’t expect yourself to go the gym, workout really hard, and feel great. Nope. You’d be in a fair amount of pain and pretty uncomfortable if you push yourself that hard.

Instead, you slowly start working out and increasing weights and the duration of exercise as you get stronger and stronger. Your nervous needs just the same kind of adjustment period.

As I said, part of you was terrified at going to the class, so just like you’d console a little kid that was terrified of riding a bike, we need you to console yourself. Tell yourself that you don’t need to go ride 10 miles, but if you can just ride for 10 feet, then you’re doing great. Just get into the water for a few minutes, do some small exercises, and call it good for the day.

Be patient with yourself and throughout the whole process, remind yourself (whether you have pain or not) that you’re doing great.

---

Any advice or information provided here does not and is not intended to be and should not be taken to constitute specific professional or psychological advice given to any group or individual. This general advice is provided with the guidance that any person who believes that they may be suffering from any medical, psychological, or mindbody condition should seek professional advice from a qualified, registered/licensed physician and/or psychotherapist who has the opportunity to meet with the patient, take a history, possibly examine the patient, review medical and/or mental health records, and provide specific advice and/or treatment based on their experience diagnosing and treating that condition or range of conditions. No general advice provided here should be taken to replace or in any way contradict advice provided by a qualified, registered/licensed physician and/or psychotherapist who has the opportunity to meet with the patient, take a history, possibly examine the patient, review medical and/or mental health records, and provide specific advice and/or treatment based on their experience diagnosing and treating that condition or range of conditions.

The general advice and information provided in this format is for informational purposes only and cannot serve as a way to screen for, identify, or diagnose depression, anxiety, or other psychological conditions. If you feel you may be suffering from any of these conditions please contact a licensed mental health practitioner for an in-person consultation.

Questions may be edited for brevity and/or readability.

 

Hi, Guest.

Daniel Lyman has given you excellent advice. I especially agree with him about doing exercise or going back into the pool gradually,
small steps at a time. Each step makes us feel better physically and emotionally. As you do them, think positively that they are helping you heal.

And if you haven't yet, start the Structured Educational Program which is free in the subforum on this web site. It will take you through short
daily steps to discover the TMS emotional causes of your pain. Then healing comes. It's healed me and many others.