How do I get rid of beliefs that come as a symptom of TMS?

[embodydami]

Without going too deep into my personal story, a couple years ago I healed myself of debilitating back pain through reading Dr Sarnos work about TMS. I felt so in my power that I was sure I would never have to deal with physical pain again. However this year I started getting chronic headaches on the right side of my head that were so intense and would last up to 2.5 months. Ive had migraines my whole life so I naturally assumed this must be physical and I fell off my progress and out of my power. I was back in the loop for the last 8 months. I noticed that the head pain would manifest most when I had plans I was really looking forward to, like a self-sabotaging pattern. I could feel great all week and as soon as the weekend came around and I was excited to do something (even if it was as simple as enjoy my time off work at home by myself) the headache would start and I was in pain all day. This pattern happened so many times..I fell so depressed because of this and developed a belief that "Im not allowed to have fun." It felt like everyone around me could feel light and free and enjoy fun and I just had to suffer. I came to my senses and realized this is TMS in another form. Im currently still doing work but Im finding Im struggling the most to let go of the belief that I can't have fun, and the fear that Im going to get this head pain as soon as Im looking forward to something.. even though I know its just the TMS. Ive tried to do work around deserving to have fun, but Im really curious if anyone has experienced something similar even after the knowledge that its the TMS. Ive even uncovered why I manifested the first migraine I had when I was 5, and this aftermath belief is still hanging around!

 

[Kozas]

Yes! I have mainly stomach and teeth pain but before events I have headeches. My solution? Trying to relax is pointless, so try to meditate some time before event. Even 5-10 minutes can calm you and kinda forget about anything. This way you can 'cheat' your subconscious because you are not concentrating on the future, but on the present and your breath. It helps me

 

[JanAtheCPA]

Frustrating, but also interesting, because I remember that the phenomenon of the "weekend headache" was discussed in an article I read at least twenty years ago, which postulated a mindbody connection. I don't recall the exact premise of the article, but I feel like it meshed with Dr Sarno's distraction theory (which years later made total sense to me when I came across it in 2011). I do remember that the article proposed that it had nothing to do with self-punishment, but rather the opposite: it was the brain's opportunity to finally let go of the stress and pressures of the work week, all at once, kind of a crash-landing.

Indeed, I recall that I was very taken by the concept back then, when I had a 40-hour office job, because I also frequently experienced bad headaches on Saturdays. The crazy thing is that I realize now that those became less frequent after reading the article. You might compare it to the so-called "book cure", and it absolutely was, because, without any other knowledge, or any emotional growth or work, my weekend headaches were, in fact, replaced by other symptoms - the ones that I was still suffering from in 2011 when I discovered Dr. Sarno. Thanks to the things I learned on this forum and from the SEP, I got my life back, although, as with all things TMS, it's an ongoing story.

In any case, @embodydami, you don't need to believe for one more second that you don't deserve to enjoy your time off. You do need to figure out what your fearful primitive brain thinks it is protecting you from, once the distraction of the work week has ended.

 

[JanAtheCPA]

Well, I don't know about "cheating" your subconscious, but @Kozas reminds me that the use of positive visualization is in fact very powerful.

 

[Kozas]

Well, I don't know about "cheating" your subconscious, but @Kozas reminds me that the use of positive visualization is in fact very powerful.

Haha yeah maybe I used wrong word! Sorry, english is not my first language. Maybe better suited word would be to 'convince' subconscious or co-operate with it?
It's not even that I visualise anything I just focus on my breath and let my thoughts pass by, sometimes I focus on good feelings comming and soothing me, it's not even about 'healing me' or 'curing my pain' it's only about mental soothing. Very beneficial for me!