yb44
Beloved Grand Eagle
Hello all,
It’s been a long time posting. I was here a while back, posted something which another contributor criticised so I deleted my comment and left, sensitive sole that I am.
Anyway the last decade has been a challenge to say the least. Life changing accident for my daughter, divorce, three job changes, three house moves, C19 with months of isolation, mother’s death and plans to retire next year. Lots of abandonment issues, feeling like a burden, not wanting to be a burden.
In the UK we are offered general health checks as long as we don’t have any pre-existing medical conditions like asthma or diabetes. Normally they take place once every three years. Because of the backlog caused in part by the whole C19 thing, I hadn’t had one for eight years. I do have general blood checks yearly. On the back of the health check, I was sent for further blood tests. I spoke with a GP over the phone (can’t get an in-person appointment for love nor money). She told me one of my liver enzymes was slightly high but nothing to worry about, yet she asked a series of questions that must have triggered my TMS inclinations there and then. She sent me for a bone scan to check for osteoporosis which runs in my family. I then waited 5 weeks to get another phone appointment with a different GP to hear the results. She told me I was on the cusp between osteopenia and osteoporosis (I had been diagnosed with osteopenia over 20 years ago). I could go on medication if I wanted. I said nope, don’t want meds. She then made me explain why. Finally she conceded and said they’d test again in 3 years. Oh, and the liver enzymes thing? Nothing new. It’s been slightly elevated since 2021. Don’t worry about it! Kinda late to tell me that. The first GP hadn’t disclosed this pertinent fact.
Almost from the day I spoke with the first GP I started to experience pain. Type and location irrelevant. After rest, exercise, getting on with my life, it’s still with me months later. Some days are better than others. It’s got TMS written all over it. Perfect storm, nocebos, existential issues. It all fits.
It’s been a long time posting. I was here a while back, posted something which another contributor criticised so I deleted my comment and left, sensitive sole that I am.
Anyway the last decade has been a challenge to say the least. Life changing accident for my daughter, divorce, three job changes, three house moves, C19 with months of isolation, mother’s death and plans to retire next year. Lots of abandonment issues, feeling like a burden, not wanting to be a burden.
In the UK we are offered general health checks as long as we don’t have any pre-existing medical conditions like asthma or diabetes. Normally they take place once every three years. Because of the backlog caused in part by the whole C19 thing, I hadn’t had one for eight years. I do have general blood checks yearly. On the back of the health check, I was sent for further blood tests. I spoke with a GP over the phone (can’t get an in-person appointment for love nor money). She told me one of my liver enzymes was slightly high but nothing to worry about, yet she asked a series of questions that must have triggered my TMS inclinations there and then. She sent me for a bone scan to check for osteoporosis which runs in my family. I then waited 5 weeks to get another phone appointment with a different GP to hear the results. She told me I was on the cusp between osteopenia and osteoporosis (I had been diagnosed with osteopenia over 20 years ago). I could go on medication if I wanted. I said nope, don’t want meds. She then made me explain why. Finally she conceded and said they’d test again in 3 years. Oh, and the liver enzymes thing? Nothing new. It’s been slightly elevated since 2021. Don’t worry about it! Kinda late to tell me that. The first GP hadn’t disclosed this pertinent fact.
Almost from the day I spoke with the first GP I started to experience pain. Type and location irrelevant. After rest, exercise, getting on with my life, it’s still with me months later. Some days are better than others. It’s got TMS written all over it. Perfect storm, nocebos, existential issues. It all fits.
