Jccfergie
Newcomer
Hu all, I posted this in the “general” forum 2 days ago, and didn’t receive much reply. I gather this is actually the place for this kind of post, not there, though I do want to say thank you to Kalo for a thoughtful and kind reply.
This is my first post on this forum. I first discovered the concept of TMS years back, while living in Russia, at about age 25. I had already dealt with about 7 years of mysterious back pain, and migraines since the age of 9, which a litany of testing did nothing to address. (It was all done at Columbia-Presbyterian, where I grew up in NYC, among the best hospitals in the nation). All of the TMS models stuck like glue, but I had very little means to seek real guidance with it, so I adopted some of the principles, and moved on. A few years later, I used a very similar approach to treating years of substance abuse/addiction, and it proved far more effective than any of the previous “brain disease” or 12-step models.
Still, the chronic pains, while minor and dulled, never went away. This winter, after what was a few years of tremendous upheaval, both joyful and traumatic, bad hip/glute pain and sciaticareturned, without any acute cause. I took an approach of slow yoga, meditation, some PT protocols, and frankly, some psychedelic work, and it cleared. Then again, a very stressful life moment hit in April, and it’s been a struggle since. Most recently, it’s sciatica, to the extent that I can barely walk, work or stand up (yet I can still squat 400lbs without issue), along with neck pain, TMJ, tooth pain that comes and goes with the jaw tension, and migraines. I read up on TMS again, and even more, it stuck. I’ve been seen by every physical specialist under the sun. Nothing. I’ve tried reading and meditating more, and nothing’s working.
I am now singularly obsessed with the pain and tension I’m feeling, and the hopelessness and lack of function accompanying it. I’m not enjoying my work, my farm, my community, my hobbies, my marriage. I am functioning at maybe 15%, on a good day. I’m not overtly suicidal, but I’m not enjoying being alive, and the thoughts are getting darker and scarier. This is just horrible.
What are some of the best options or resources for such extreme cases? I have basically unlimited financial resources, and can make time. This has got to stop before it unravels my entire life. I’m really scared.
Thank you for any help or advice. Blessings,
Jim
This is my first post on this forum. I first discovered the concept of TMS years back, while living in Russia, at about age 25. I had already dealt with about 7 years of mysterious back pain, and migraines since the age of 9, which a litany of testing did nothing to address. (It was all done at Columbia-Presbyterian, where I grew up in NYC, among the best hospitals in the nation). All of the TMS models stuck like glue, but I had very little means to seek real guidance with it, so I adopted some of the principles, and moved on. A few years later, I used a very similar approach to treating years of substance abuse/addiction, and it proved far more effective than any of the previous “brain disease” or 12-step models.
Still, the chronic pains, while minor and dulled, never went away. This winter, after what was a few years of tremendous upheaval, both joyful and traumatic, bad hip/glute pain and sciaticareturned, without any acute cause. I took an approach of slow yoga, meditation, some PT protocols, and frankly, some psychedelic work, and it cleared. Then again, a very stressful life moment hit in April, and it’s been a struggle since. Most recently, it’s sciatica, to the extent that I can barely walk, work or stand up (yet I can still squat 400lbs without issue), along with neck pain, TMJ, tooth pain that comes and goes with the jaw tension, and migraines. I read up on TMS again, and even more, it stuck. I’ve been seen by every physical specialist under the sun. Nothing. I’ve tried reading and meditating more, and nothing’s working.
I am now singularly obsessed with the pain and tension I’m feeling, and the hopelessness and lack of function accompanying it. I’m not enjoying my work, my farm, my community, my hobbies, my marriage. I am functioning at maybe 15%, on a good day. I’m not overtly suicidal, but I’m not enjoying being alive, and the thoughts are getting darker and scarier. This is just horrible.
What are some of the best options or resources for such extreme cases? I have basically unlimited financial resources, and can make time. This has got to stop before it unravels my entire life. I’m really scared.
Thank you for any help or advice. Blessings,
Jim
