Hello to you, my future friends!
My first experience of Dr. Sarno’s work was the John Stossel video. I bought his books and have been reading and journaling and releasing RAGE for twelve days now.
I have no doubt whatsoever that this is what I’ve been looking for during all my years of suffering Chronic Fatigue and debilitating Depression!
I am feeling oxygen returning to my muscles - life!
I have so much to share I can’t type it all.
This is a summary of my story:
With depression I told my mother when I was age 7 that I wanted to die. In 1971 in my world things like this were not talked about in my world. Nor was there much medical ‘help’ for me at that time.
I don’t know when my father’s abuse started but I know I lived in terror since at least she 5. I sat at the top of the stairs one night when I was supposed to be asleep and heard my father talking softly to my mother about me. He said ‘I don’t know, sometimes I want to kill her’. So began my deeper fear that I believed he was going to kill me I just didn’t know when. My fight or flight response was in a permanent state of ON until 12 days ago (I am 57 and was home bound)! I was taught in my formative years and until age 20 when I moved out that I was shameful, unworthy and undeserving of love. I got hit with the belt, spanked until I bled, days (or weeks I can’t remember) of the silent treatment and always there was the Death Stare. When drinking sometimes my father would hug me in a sexual way and sometimes he exposed himself. Yes this is getting long. Mom was incapable of nurturing or expressing love.
Since I always hated myself I made big and bad decisions throughout my life.
I totally embrace this recovery program. I struggle with how fast my mind feeds me lies even when I am practicing mindfulness!
Thank for listening to me!
Oh, and I have some back pain which is not nearly as painful as the Chronic Fatigue, Depression - and I forgot to mention Binge Eating disorder, also since childhood. The CF started after my second divorce at age 35.
Peace.
My first experience of Dr. Sarno’s work was the John Stossel video. I bought his books and have been reading and journaling and releasing RAGE for twelve days now.
I have no doubt whatsoever that this is what I’ve been looking for during all my years of suffering Chronic Fatigue and debilitating Depression!
I am feeling oxygen returning to my muscles - life!
I have so much to share I can’t type it all.
This is a summary of my story:
With depression I told my mother when I was age 7 that I wanted to die. In 1971 in my world things like this were not talked about in my world. Nor was there much medical ‘help’ for me at that time.
I don’t know when my father’s abuse started but I know I lived in terror since at least she 5. I sat at the top of the stairs one night when I was supposed to be asleep and heard my father talking softly to my mother about me. He said ‘I don’t know, sometimes I want to kill her’. So began my deeper fear that I believed he was going to kill me I just didn’t know when. My fight or flight response was in a permanent state of ON until 12 days ago (I am 57 and was home bound)! I was taught in my formative years and until age 20 when I moved out that I was shameful, unworthy and undeserving of love. I got hit with the belt, spanked until I bled, days (or weeks I can’t remember) of the silent treatment and always there was the Death Stare. When drinking sometimes my father would hug me in a sexual way and sometimes he exposed himself. Yes this is getting long. Mom was incapable of nurturing or expressing love.
Since I always hated myself I made big and bad decisions throughout my life.
I totally embrace this recovery program. I struggle with how fast my mind feeds me lies even when I am practicing mindfulness!
Thank for listening to me!
Oh, and I have some back pain which is not nearly as painful as the Chronic Fatigue, Depression - and I forgot to mention Binge Eating disorder, also since childhood. The CF started after my second divorce at age 35.
Peace.
