I feel like you and me are on very much same trajectory. My grief is that I can’t have children if i have pain (we wanted them just before my injury and that put a stop to it!), but TMS is the gift that stopped me from hitting those life KPIs for the sake of it. I genuinely think I wouldn’t have been a good mother, with all the self-doubt, pressure, Type A personality traits I don’t think I’d have done a good job. When I get out the other side of this, im going to be someone I never thought I could, and that’s someone who loves themselves wholeheartedly (and thus loves the extension of themselves even more deeply)