Giving up the 'props'....

Hi all, I'm working my way through the books and trying to take all the advice on board - it all makes perfect sense, including stopping using all the props I've been using such as heat, pillows, walking stick, rolling walker etc and I completely understand the need to do this. The problem is that I can't walk more than about 100m unaided without being in excruciating pain - that's fine, I'm willing to face that one and scream at my brain to switch the pain off, command it to do so. Alas my brain is ignoring me. Once I get where I'm going (perhaps to the shops) if I find myself having to stand still in a queue for example, I'm almost passing out with pain and sometimes have to sit down on the floor. Then I can't get home again because of the pain. I take the theory on board and understand it, but in practical terms it's not possible at the moment. How do others get through this one please? I'm really keen to find out as I realise it's stopping me moving forward with getting out of TMS.

 

All of us who are healed went through this. It was probably the scariest part. I was so addicted to my back brace, it felt like a loving Gods embrace around me... the thought of not wearing it was terrifying, Even after I intellectually knew it was a conditioned prop!
Sarno was pretty clear that we do this as our confidence builds. Just like returning to full activity it is necessary BUT doing it prematurely could possibly scare us (You'll never be 'hurt' by it...at least physically)

When I worked through each one I focused on Conditioning (standing still is such a benign activity) and what might have been going on the first time I ever thought that standing caused pain. You might want to meditate on the ridiculous truth that others' pain is triggered by sitting! The other most benign activity in the world...

our intellectual brain is usually weeks in front of the unconscious... don't stress about it...keep advertising in your own head and you will KNOW when it is time

 

Thanks so much @Baseball65 - I was really worrying about that but will relax and let it happen in its own time. I think things are starting to move, because today reading one of Sarno's books, I suddenly and inexplicably started to cry - let it go a bit as I knew what was happening. Walking afterwards was considerably better (from not being able to) and I even got out of the car and forgot that I'm usually in agony when I do that. Had coffee with a friend and was tearful again three times. Feel like a bit of a dork but she also suffers from TMS (diagnosed by me!) and I know I can be myself with her, and she is going to start reading my books, so a good day all round although I've used quite a few tissues!!!! Thanks again for your support, I really appreciate it.

 

To which I will add, take this transition slowly! Just like people who want to stop taking their pain or depression meds, or others who want to get back to their old gym routine, you were at the severe stage of using a walker, and although you know consciously that you don't need it, you have to give your body and your fearful brain the time to learn this for themselves after many years of living with fear and with walking aids.

Take the walking stick with you, and do a little meditation before you step out the door. Visualize yourself walking easily with the stick, and standing comfortably in line with it, but not needing to lean on it. Say to your brain that it's okay to have it there for comfort right now, but that you don't really need it, and that together you're going to work on using it less and less.

If you have to stand in line, listen to your poor fearful brain as it tries to go into "Oh no, a line!" fear mode, and talk back to it, calm it down, tell it that you can do this, because you are perfectly safe and this is not necessary!

Are you doing the SEP?

 

Thank you @JanAtheCPA - that's helped me to relax about what props I need. When I use the walker, I'm very careful now to not actually lean on it unless I feel I need to so I don't think I will be long before I'm good enough to stop. I'm crying LOADS at all sorts of daft things - actually dreading the Remembrance Day Service this afternoon in the retirement village where I live, as I don't doubt I will be very emotional (I always am anyway at this service). I'm afraid I don't know (and a search isn't telling me on here) what SEP stands for, but I'm assuming it's some kind of program. I'm not, but I'm following Dr David Schechter's workbook every day and completing the questions on there, which I guess might be the kind of thing you mean. Getting to some of the 'nitty gritty' questions now which is opening a lot of old emotion - hence the tears I guess! I am definitely improving massively day by day and seeing a pain-free future ahead of me!

 

Perfect. Yes, sorry, the SEP is our Structured Educational Program, on the main wiki, and the work will be similar, but it has links to outside videos and articles, for different perspectives.

The early days can be hard, and emotional, and confusing, often involving new symptoms and and/or increases in old ones. But it sounds to me like you're doing the work! You will experience success, I feel it.

 

Thank you for the encouragement @JanAtheCPA I finally know I'm on the right track!