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Gentle and Bemused Change

Hi Lily, it's great to hear of your progress. Taking it at your own pace and with a feeling of control is 100% the right way to go.

And symptoms that rise and fall are the rule during recovery. Sometimes it is nice to think of a tide going out. The overall water may fluctuate, but it is the tide itself that really matters.
 
Update: Last eve, I made another attempt to remove the vicodin from the nightly meds. This time I inserted a substitute in the form of Kava extract. Kava has been helping with my afternoon IBS (significant pain reduction). A small insert here - the night before last I experienced a severe nightmare, the first in many many years. My nightmare-veteran-husband handled it well, and our dog cuddled close. So it was a strong leap for me to attempt any changes last eve. However, leap I did.

It worked.

As of today, I am vicodin free. *smiles* I do, however, reserve the right to take one 'as needed'. So long as I leave my options open, I rarely need to revisit those options.

This ... because of all of you on this forum. Thank you!

with grace and much gratitude,
^_^
 
Hi Lily Rose,

That's wonderful news, I'm so proud of you ! :joyful:

Doesn't it feel good to get off one of your regular medications. You're doing this exactly right, slowly and only when you feel absolutely ready. Every med I eliminated felt like a small victory, and encouraged me to keep going. The date I got off everything was 10th June 2012, it's like my second birthday ;)

I think you're right to allow yourself the "as needed" option, it takes the pressure off.

I don't know if you're a religious person, but I saw a billboard outside a church today saying "Remember, whatever is in front of you, God is behind you." It really cheered me up.

Just keep going, you're making fantastic progress :happy:
 
I love reading positive updates like this! I haven't had a prescription for Vicodin for many years, but I will admit that when I did it was wonderful. Mind you, I hoarded medication and took advantage of the refills. Even when I was off the medication, I stockpiled it. I probably have several large vials of the stuff in our safe for emergencies. Ha! I found that after going off the med that if pain was bad enough to go back on, I would beat myself up over it, thinking I was going addict. When I would have a flare up, I would take a had a pill a day and even feel guilty over that. I almost rather wanted to be in pain than take med! Well, now if something flares up (it has to be pretty bad), I give myself permission to take something ....... telling myself it's for the symptom, not the cause.
 
Hi, girls. Great posts from you all today.

I love the church billboard sign. It's a keeper for my desktop.

Lily Rose, wonderful news.
I've used Kava tablets in the past and they were fantastic.
I took one tablet to get through a stressful afternoon a few years ago and it gave me a
relaxed day and night and into the next day.
I keep a bottle handy for if and when. They're my "Dumbo's feather" to give me courage at times.

For anyone reading this post who doesn't know about Kava, there are web sites all about it.
It's a natural herbal kind of tranquilizer. It doesn't make anyone drowsy or lose touch with what's
going in, it just moves worries and anxieties to the back of the head so we don't think about them.

And they're not habit forming.

I'd like to know your experiences with Kava if you want to share them.
 
I forgot to add that I too have used Kava. My nurse practitioner actually recommended to me years ago when I was in the thick of panic attacks. It is wonderful!
 
I bet Kava could help a lot with panic attacks.

I don't consider using Kava a TMS crutch.

Sometimes we need some help beyond the meditation and other TMS techniques,
and Kava is part of God's creations.

I read that Captain Cook discovered Kava on a voyage to the South Seas and asked
islanders how they became so relaxed. They told them they made a drink from the Kava root.
That evolved into the tablets or powder used today.
 
Congratulations Lily Rose! We all know we are changing every day from the healing work we are doing and through this community, but it is nice to have those concrete, objective milestones from time to time.

I got rid of my pain medication last June, but I still have 2 other meds I'm working on reducing gradually. I've now cut those in half. I'm beginning to feel so much more like myself, and more in touch with my feelings.
 
Ellen, did the doctor say it's okay to cut the medication in half? He may want to keep having you on them,
but if you don't notice any adverse reactions by the gradual reducing, it's doing great for you psychologically.
 
walt glenview said:
Ellen, did the doctor say it's okay to cut the medication in half? He may want to keep having you on them,
but if you don't notice any adverse reactions by the gradual reducing, it's doing great for you psychologically.
Click to expand...
I'm working with my doctor on this, so all is good. But thanks for your concern.
 
Hi, Ellen. I asked because a few years ago I had financial problems that caused some anxiety
and got some medication from my doctor but after a few months stopped taking it cold turkey
and felt some withdrawal. It eventually went away but I should probably have asked my doctor
how to ween myself off of it.
 
I have also been quite successful at reducing medications. I reduced my amitriptiline to .25 from .50 now for 6 years. I also was taking 325mg Ambien, reduced now to half that, some nights none at all. I very seldom take a Tylenol at night anymore.
 
Congratulations Lily-Rose - what a wonderful milestone for you!

Years ago, before I ever even knew what TMS was, I had many years of "nervous stomach" issues. Fear of people/people-pleaser, anxiety, etc brought on near-panic-attacks and spastic colon/run to the bathroom issues for me. Kava Kava worked wonders for me. It really helped with the stomach spasms and with my nerves in general. In fact, I'm glad it's been brought up on this board as I think I will try it again to help through the anxiety and fears I'm facing as I work towards a cure. I'm not sure how it affects others, but sometimes I would take up to 6-8 capsules all at once (as opposed to the recommended 1-2) to give me the relief I needed.

If anyone is thinking to try it, it should be noted that Kava Kava isn't designed for long term use: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kava
 
I've taken Kava Kava just one tablet and it calms me. Haven't taken it for years but it works for me.

I read that it isn't habit forming and it's only natural herbs that help us to relax and relieves anxiety.
 
Another, small update: As of last eve, the reduction of Gabapentin went down another 300mg. I was anticipating some withdrawals, but as of yet, I am clear. Perhaps more prone to the heat surges, but nothing untoward. I mentioned to my saint-husband of my surprise, and his response was simply, "When ever you set your mind to something, you do it." Indeed. This is why I take such time in mulling over things, soaking information, considering.

This forum, and all of you which make up this forum, truly are beautiful souls.

with grace and much gratitude, I thank you ^_^
 
Lily Rose, I was elated to hear your update. You have accomplished so much! You are so
very strong and determined, that's why you are moving forward with your life. I truly
admire and respect you for your support and utter strength. Keep writing and encourage
all of us to move to higher levels as you have. Love You, Nancy
 
Lily Rose,

Congratulations on another milestone! I love the confidence you have in making these changes.

Reading about your 'heat surges' reminds me that I haven't had that symptom for awhile. Oops! Hope I'm not setting myself up to have that symptom today. Oh well, I can chase it away if it comes. I know it's just TMS messing with my ANS.

Onward and upward, dear one.....
 
nancy said:
Lily Rose, I was elated to hear your update. You have accomplished so much! You are so
very strong and determined, that's why you are moving forward with your life. I truly
admire and respect you for your support and utter strength. Keep writing and encourage
all of us to move to higher levels as you have. Love You, Nancy
Click to expand...

Read these words aloud as you look into that mirror, Nancy ..... read them and know they are YOU.

Ellen said:
Congratulations on another milestone! I love the confidence you have in making these changes.

Reading about your 'heat surges' reminds me that I haven't had that symptom for awhile. Oops! Hope I'm not setting myself up to have that symptom today. Oh well, I can chase it away if it comes. I know it's just TMS messing with my ANS.

Onward and upward, dear one.....
Click to expand...

Confidence ..... mmmm *smiles* That, and a bit of 'What do I have to lose?' attitude. I am careful not to trap myself, or lock myself in any boxes. The meds remain nearby. I always leave myself an emergency exit option ... this allows me to be free in my exploration. If something is taken away from me, I fret ... if I walk away from it myself, well, that changes everything. Eventually the meds will fade out, and they will be just a memory. But not today. Small, watchful steps, fully observing all reactions.

Heat surges ... I rather like them. Being always cold, this makes a delightful change.

with grace and gratitude,
^_^
 
Medication, relaxation pills, I call "Dumbo's feathers" and have kept them handy but rarely used them.
It gave me strength and comfort to know I could take them if I wanted, or really needed to.

Eventually I left them in the bottle or at home and lived my life without them.

A psychological crutch? Probably, but they helped to have if needed. I just came so I didn't need them.
 
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